Merkin of GIANTSBOARD.COM

GAMEBALL and JOKER ==> GIANTS at RANGERS 11/01 WORLD SERIES GAME 5

2010-11-02T01:27:00.000-07:00

World Motherfucking Champions my friends….been waiting a fucking LONG TIME for this…..all those years of futility and heartbreak….all those cold nights at Candlestick and Pac Bell Park….. all those games listened to on the radio, watched on TV and in person….…..all the box scores poured over, the stats and scouting reports read….all the hundreds and thousands of dollars spend on gear and tickets and travel…..all TIME spent working the Giants into our lives day in and day out for most of the year every fucking year……all the disrespect from the media and rival fanbases……all the ghosts of the past that haunted us…..all of the emotional investment that you have put into this team…..well my friends….it was all worth it……everything you put into this team has been paid back tonight……so dear rest of the Baseball World…..Kiss My Ass and Suck My Dick…..the San Franfuckingcisco Giants are WORLD CHAMPIONS……and THE only trophy that really means anything is FINALLY coming home…….

GAMEBALL and JOKER ==> GIANTS at RANGERS 11/01 WORLD SERIES GAME 5

GAMEBALL

RENTERIA

Edgar fucking Renteria…..World Series MVP…..it doesn't matter that he had back to back overpaid subpar years anymore….when we look back years from now at Edgar in a Giants uniform, all you can say is World Series MVP…..he could ride down that Market Street Parade fondling himself screaming racial epithets and he would still of a fucknig Hero…..just Maldonado and Jose Cruz's are victims of forgotten regular seasons over post season mishaps……Edgar will benefit from being THE MAN with his 2 Homers in 2 separate World Series game to give the Giants a lead then would not relinquish……good job Edgar, and don't be surprised if we don't see Edgar back in a Giants uniform next year…..and no matter how he plays during the regular season, we can always fall back on that whole Clutch thing…..just get him to the playoffs……

TIP OF THE CAP :
LINCECUM
Within a batter, I knew Timmy was on and the Rangers had a uphill battle….he looked as sharp as the Shutout versus the Braves…..and how can you not love this kid…..Athletic with the long hair and free spirit (code word for likes to smoke pot)……he's everything that Nor Cal cool is all about….I can't see this kid in any other uniform, and lets hope he feels the same

WILSON
Yes, was nails all postseason…..and tonight did something neither Nen nor Beck ever did…..get the ULTIMATE out of the season…..

ROSS and URIBE
Back to Back singles set up the game winner

HUFF
Laid down a nice sacrifice bunt…..his FIRST of his career…..and in a World Series Clincher…..and man was it a beaut….

HARMON and SUE BURNS
For helping save the Giants from the move, wish you could be here with us and hope you are watching…..

McGowan
Catches a lot of flak, but was a major part of keeping this team here and by extension making this day possible

SABEAN and STAFF
Taken their share of flak….and maybe Sabean isn't making those calls in the draft…..but someone in that office picked Cain JSanchez Wilson Posey Bumgarner Linceceum Romo Runzler and obtained Huff Pat Ross FSanchez Uribe and now we can put Renteria on that list,…..yeah, they have made a couple bonehead moves, but when you bring home that Trophy, all that shit fades in importance……

SAN FRANCISCO GIANTS FANS
We got a KICK ASS Fanbase…..smart, loyal, tenacious, stubborn…and there are a FUCKING SHIT LOAD of us…..man, I am proud to be one of you and call myself a Giants Fan….. we don't get enough love from the rest of baseball, and it don't fucking matter…now we got our fucking Trophy and no Media Expert can take that away from us…..

TJ
Got Will Clark Auto, Got to see the Giants Win it all…..and even got Torres Champagne goggles as a souvenir…

JOKER

DODGERS

Dodgers??? What the hell??? Why you talking about the Dodgers…..I will tell you ……when I was a kid the Giants broke my heart…..the year was 1987…..I was still young so I figured that if it wasn't 1987, then 1988 was certainly our year…..most of the same team coming back and hell we didn't find out stride until the second half anyway…..yup was going to be 1988…well…..lets just say 1988 isn't famous for a Giants Victory…..and I was not only crushed my Giants weren't back in the postseason…..I got to watch the storybook Dodgers take the fucking title….Mickey Fucking Hatcher….no speed, no bat, no power, no defense….what the FUCK……well I tell you what…..as bad as I felt on that day…….I have to imagine that's what those Dodger fucks are feeling right now……looking at how their year when to SHIT….how their owner screwed them over and how the Giants have THEIR STORYBOOK team ride into October all the way to the promised land……Hey Call me a Sore Winner if you will, but part of being on top of the mountain is rubbing it into the faces of those less fortunate….

SMACK OF THE STICK :
A'S FANS
Plenty of room on the bandwagon, come on over…..and hey, after the A's move your kids will grow up to be Giants fans anyway….its what's best for your family

ARLINGTON
Hey, look at the bright side…..at least you won't have to watch your home team lose the Super Bowl too

OK Folks…..honestly this whole thing is still a little surreal……headed into the City right after the last out ….we flipped over a Couple Zip Cars and set fire to a Segway…..but it still hasn't settled in…..just watched the Trophy Ceremony and it is starting to set in…..maybe tonight when I close my eyes….maybe Wednesday when we are at the Parade…..maybe come spring when we are back at the park…..not sure how I will finally react……the only thing I DO know is we are no longer that cursed franchise striving to someday reach the top…..no, this changes everything……we CAN get there, and now we are just like a bunch of other teams that know the taste of victory……was convinced it would never happen in my lifetime……now it has…..and, well……maybe I can stop being such a cynical fuck….well, for at least a few months.,……

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(The fine print: There will be cussing and bad taste. This is written with the heat of the moment feel you may have during the game, with rational thought sprinkled in now and then. This is entertainment folks, sure there is a lot of truth and I am a genius, but this is all about having a laugh and enjoying the ride…….now lets go heckle Jeff Kent when he gets inducted to Cooperstown..)

by merkin

GAMEBALL and JOKER ==> GIANTS at RANGERS 10/31 WORLD SERIES GAME 4

2010-10-31T23:56:00.001-07:00

It was a night of celebration for San Francisco Giants fans…. everyone texting, phoning, and emailing each other in anticipation of the Giants first World Championship in San Francisco…..but as excited as we all are…..just something to remember…the Last Time the Giants were up 3-1 in the World Series….umm…errr….well.. It was 1933 and Carl Hubbell just Finished pitching an 11 inning complete game in a Series the Giants would win….well, that doesn't really illustrate my point….my point is, as Giants Fans we all know it ain't over until its over and no game is as important as the next game…..so yes, be happy and enjoy the moment, but until that last out is made you keep the pressure on…..and DESPITE having tickets in hand for Games 6 and 7…..I hope the Giants finish this thing off tomorrow and those tickets remain unused oddball keepsake of games never played…..

GAMEBALL and JOKER ==> GIANTS at RANGERS 10/31 WORLD SERIES GAME 4

GAMEBALL

BUMGARNER

Man, what they heck can you say about this kid….his crossfire slingshot 94mph hitting the inside corner to righthanders…..his offspeed pitches on the outside breaking down hitters…..his awshucks demeanor with the press….Electric Stuff and Cool Head….and the kid was just straight up Money tonight going 8 strong and dominating the vaunted Rangers offense in their own backyard……all at the tender age of 21……I mean what were YOU doing when you were 21?....hell what was Timmy, Matty, and Sanchez doing when THEY were 21……hell, even Mozart was a late bloomer compared to Madison……Ahhh to be Young, Talented, and on the Verge of a Championship…….

TIP OF THE CAP :
HUFF
Huff into the DH role which is easier that it sounds, but Aubrey was up the task Hammering a Curveball from Hunter into the Texas night for the Giants first runs of the night

SANCHEZ
Hitless on the night, and failed to advance Torres from second twice with no one out….but that didn't matter tonight, as Sanchez was the man with leather tonight, with great play after play … a snag and turn on a Hamilton hot shot….a vertical leap and snag on a Francoeur liner….and shot hop and tag on Hamilton's Stolen Base Attempt…..a catch on the deflected ball and tag on Hamiltons grounder…..and then starting a DP with a quick feed on the 6th…..man, Freddy was about as game changing as you can get from an infielder on defense…….

TORRES
Was all over the bases tonight, single and a Stolen Base…..and a pair of Doubles, including driving home the 3rd run of the night……Andres has found his stroke again just in time for the series, and it sure is a beautiful thing…..

WILSON
What…..1-2-3??? guess it doesn't ALWAYS need to be torture……

POSEY
Hit a Fucking Titleist Golf Ball to Center Field and that thing just carried……but the most BEAUTIFUL DEFENSIVE PLAY I have seen in a while is the SEED it throws to Second to a Sanchez Shorthop tag on Hamitlon….I swear I have been watching that thing over and over, and am just sit there in disbelief…..man, that is fucking BADASS…….

RENT
3 hit night for the Kid, and 2 of those were truly blistered……and solid D in the field…..never seen Rent play this well in a Giants uniform for this long…..

URIBE
Took at 0 For, and did blow an exchange on a grounder……but he has been SOLID at 3rd and since Bochy has been running him out there, he has looked more and more comfortable….

TJ
For representing Giantsboard deep in the heart of Texas…..and for giving me the Vlad line I will use in a moment…..

JOKER

VLAD

Choose your own punchline
1) I hear Wash has petitioned Major League Baseball to play National League rules in Texas in Game 5……
2) I hear Vlad decided to go as Pat Burrell for Halloween…
Man, Vlad is piling onto the Brian Sabean redemption tour with his play in Right Field added to his embarrassment at the plate……not looking like a quarter of the Player he was in Montreal…..sure, we wanted him back in 2004 and that Angels contract expired last year…..but just hearing his name makes you think of that whole lunatic fringe quote and the shit Sabean took over the years….but enough about that……I;m going on my Tivo and watching Vlad crack a hamate bone trying to check swing on a change up one more time before bed……just fucking awesome…….

SMACK OF THE STICK :
OGANDO
Biggest stage, and with the Rangers still in the game….with its offense just itching to put up a crooked number…Big chance to make a name for yourself….…and you blow out a ribcage muscle……http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2ETfiuc7hqg#t1m55s>We know Brian Wilson says you go warrior here

HUNTER
Looks like Sidney Ponson, sweats like Tyler Walker, gets beat like a Drum…..

RANGERS FAN
Got Posey's HR and then gives it up for a simple Auto Ball….shit dude, you coulda got Catchers gear…bats…..maybe some World Series tickets…..hell, if you played your cards right you mighta gotten something you woulda really loved…..Super Bowl Tickets…….and you are pretty much guaranteed not to watch your home team lose that one……

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(The fine print: There will be cussing and bad taste. This is written with the heat of the moment feel you may have during the game, with rational thought sprinkled in now and then. This is entertainment folks, sure there is a lot of truth and I am a genius, but this is all about having a laugh and enjoying the ride…….now lets go heckle Jeff Kent when he gets inducted to Cooperstown..)

by merkin

GAMEBALL and JOKER ==> RANGERS at GIANTS 10/28 WORLD SERIES GAME 2

2010-10-29T00:52:00.000-07:00

Holy Fuck…..what a night…… traded in my infield season seats for 3 front row bleachers…..was able to bring my girl and my Dad to the game…..and what a fucking game……last time my Dad and I were in the World Series…..well, first I cried tears of joy that I could share a World Series with my Dad….a real life Field of Dreams moment for me…..well, that sweet day in 2002 turned bitter sweet with the result of the game…..it was Game 3 and the Angels handed us our heads on a platter…….
Fast forward to tonight's crushing of the Rangers …..man….this fucking game reversed any scars I had from that Game 3…..hell my Dad was there tonight AND there for the walk off win in Game 4 of the NLCS and I got to tell you…..he has had one hell of a postseason……

So here I am, voice completely spent to the point that I can't even talk…..up 2-0 with our work still cut out for us as we travel to Texas…..and I tell you what, even though I have tickets for Game 6 and 7……I really fucking hope they close the deal on the road…..sure I would LOVE to celebrate on the field…..but I ain't taking any fucking chances……too many years that ended in misery…..when you are this close to promise land, you don't take the scenic route….you hop on the fucking expressway and you put the pedal to the floor……it takes 4 wins to take home the trophy…..we got 2…..now lets concentrate on getting that 3rd win before we even think of a 4th…….

GAMEBALL and JOKER ==> RANGERS at GIANTS 10/28 WORLD SERIES GAME 2

GAMEBALL

CAIN

Now Statsheads and sabermetrics is all good with me…..but it is also a dangerous thing when people don't understand what they are talking about…..Stats are NOT the game, Stats DESCRIBE the game…..and Stats in the wrong hands make idiots sound intelligent……I bring this up because if you have been following the Giants closely the last few years, you have likely heard how Cain wasn't GOOD, he was just LUCKY……and lucky…..and lucky……and man, looks like Cain has been lucky for another year and right into the postseason.;……you know what, take your theories and suck my left nut sack……cause I know what I see, and this guy is a FUCKING STUD……now I may use the F Bomb more than most, but I cannot emphasis this point enough….CAIN IS A MOTHERFUCKING GODDAMN FUCKING STUD…..there, I think that did it….move along…….

TIP OF THE CAP :
RENTERIA
Holy shit….I thought Edgar was supposed to be old and broken down…..well someone poured some Rocket Fuel into that old engine, cause Edgar has been solid on the D and CRUSHED a high fastball 10 rows deep for the first run of the game….chip in a single to break the game open in the 8th and he got some serious consideration for the Gameball……who knew….of the 16 starting position players, Edgar's 3 homers were less than EVERY SINGLE PLAYER IN EITHER LINEUP…..Hell, even Matt Mr Misty May Treanor had 7 Homers…….

ROSS
Nice play to 1) make Young think twice about being doubled off 2) keep Hamilton's ball in front of him……and battled a 10 pitch walk in the 7th and scored the BIG 2nd run of the game……and of course played his part in the 8th inning merry go round…..

NATE
Nice backhand stab in Triples Alley in the 7th….

URIBE
BIG RBI to plate the second run of the night and solid D on the left side once again…..

LOPEZ
Nursing a 2 run lead in the 8th, got Hamilton with a runner on 2nd and 2 down seemingly handing Wilson a 2 run lead to protect in the 9th……

JOKER

WASHINGTON

Man, I got to say that I was really confused by Washington's bullpen usage….Oliver was his guy to face Huff…..and then Uribe and Renteria???..... Well I'll take that matchup any day of the week…and it paid off for the Giants…..honestly I expected O'Day to get the call…...he has been your go to right handed setup guy, I think you HAVE to go back to him and maybe he doesn't hang a slider this time….But the real move….or lack of move was watching Holland be left out there to die….. now follow me if you will……starting from the time his first pitch missed the zone……the 65 second mark was the 1st walk…ok, just the first hitter……he will find the zone……his 6th straight ball comes at the 2:25 point, here maybe you get someone warm……3:40 mark his 8th straight ball and the pitching coach heads to the mound, here you HAVE to get someone warm……4:50 mark, another ball and finally SOMEONE starts to get warm….6:18 mark….finally a strike……6:37 mark, ball four run scores and he is out of the game……ok, now it took Lowe about 1:47 to get ready…..if you start him warming after 6 straight balls maybe he can come in before a run scores…..hell, if you start him warming during the coaches visit, you can stall for 30 more seconds and get him warm……and ALL THIS WITH AN OFF DAY tomorrow and IN THE FUCKING WORLD SERIES…..good god, Washington….this isn't a trip into Cleveland in June…..you USE what you GOT……you don't just hand this game over to the Giants……and when it was 2-0, they still had a shot….but as soon as it went 3-0 your odds went the wrong way really fucking quick…….now, it may be nit picking, but IN THE MOMENT as was just FLABERGASTED THAT NOBODY was IN THE PEN….hell, even just standing there READY TO START WARMING……….

SMACK OF THE STICK :
KINSLER
Yeah……that was a nice hit there…..your loss…..our gain…….

MOLINA
Watching the postgame interview yesterday, I got the feeling Molina wasn't that upset about the loss……sure, he's a competitor…..but we all know he is a big softy,…..and for some reason I get the feeling he wouldn't mind losing if it meant a ring for all his friends……I mean he DID spend 3 1/2 years here….his self described BEST YEARS OF HIS CAREER……and that warm welcome in Game 1 must have pulled at those heart strings……maybe I'm crazy, but something makes me believe this……maybe Molina ain't the Ranger secret weapon we thought after all…..I mean, hell he is hitting 350 in the postseason and Washington is still using Treanor as a "personal catcher" for Wilson….come on, think Eli Whiteside is going to catch Sanchez on Saturday????.....yeah, not fucking likely……

and yes, they are SMOKING WEED……not crack….and yes, its one hell of a fucking ballpark, thank you very much……

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GB and JK ARCHIVES AT THE GIANTS BOARD BLOG

(The fine print: There will be cussing and bad taste. This is written with the heat of the moment feel you may have during the game, with rational thought sprinkled in now and then. This is entertainment folks, sure there is a lot of truth and I am a genius, but this is all about having a laugh and enjoying the ride…….now lets go heckle Jeff Kent when he gets inducted to Cooperstown..)

by merkin

GAMEBALL and JOKER ==> RANGERS at GIANTS 10/27 WORLD SERIES GAME 1

2010-10-28T00:34:00.001-07:00

Man, great fucking night…..still getting over a cold with a throat that really shouldn’t be doing any yelling….. got out of work in plenty of time to get to the game and settle into my seat 24 rows up into the bleachers…….so fucking surreal…..Giants caps and jackets with that World Series patch…. the media crawling everywhere and a whole alien world feeling to a ballpark I have frequented at least a couple hundred times the past 10 years……after a few innings it started to feel like a baseball game again….and then after the 5th inning it was just a tidal wave of emotion…..celebration…..and cheering…..and somewhere in the midst of all that yelling from that raw broken throat…..I tasted blood…..now some might think it was from that damaged esophagus of mine…..but I think it was the Blood of the Texas Rangers…..and much like a wounded animal, they are dangerous……so get them while they are off balance and do as much damage as possible before we get to Texas….a 7 game series is a long time and today we got a Big win versus their ace…..but it was just 1 win……you need 3 more to bring home a trophy…….

GAMEBALL and JOKER ==> RANGERS at GIANTS 10/27 WORLD SERIES GAME 1

GAMEBALL

SANCHEZ

Man…..Sanchez was looking pretty dumb following the Timmy Brainfart inning getting his ass doubled off 2nd…….but he made up for it in spades with a double in the 3rd to knock in the Giants first run of the night and send the tying run to 3rd with 1 out…..and then again in the 5th doubling home the go ahead run….and just to put a cap on the night he knocked home in number 10 for one hell of a night……

TIP OF THE CAP :
URIBE
Of course the 3 run bomb…..but also a BIG DP in the 1st to bail Timmy out (glad Pablo wasn't out there) and then a scoot and throw on Micheal Young grounder……

RENTERIA
Solid D including gunning Ian Kinsler on a grounder that looked like it might be headed up the middle…. Uribe and Rent….may not the best range, but they make solid plays on everything they get to…..you gotta stay with this left side for the rest of the series……

TORRES
Double and a HBP and 2 runs scored…..

HUFF
3 hits and his bat is heating up

ROSS/POSEY
lone hits came in the middle of rallies…..

CASILLA
Restored order with a big strike out to bail out Timmy in the 6th…and then worked through a Huff error in the 7th

ROMO
Pitched through a chop hit to get it to the 9th……

WILSON
Meh…..we got the win

JOKER

LEE

The most popular question I have received the last few days was….."So like….uhh, what you think of Cliff Lee?"…….my response……he's a pitcher and last I saw he has an ERA above 0…….I was more worried about Halladay Hamels and Derek Lowe….sure, the Giants have more history against those pitchers…..but all three of those guys have better STUFF than Lee….now don't get me wrong, Lee is a great pitcher….but he can be had…..he lives off control and if he isn't hitting his spots, then he can be hit….now you can say that about a lot of pitchers….but with Lee he is hitting his spots like a Left Handed Greg Maddux…….and those off nights are few ……so good news is the Giants were able to lay off teasers and punish mistakes and get the W…..but just cause we got him here in SF doesn't mean he won't come out with a Gem in Arlington in game 5…..but then again, we have proven he is human after all….and that’s gotta help any future matchup……..

SMACK OF THE STICK :
TIMMY
About a big a brain fart as I have seen in a long time….that was so bad I actually.saw an infant in a stroller jump to his feet and utter his first words….."WHAT THE FUCK IS HE DOING??? THROW THE BALL DAMMIT…"….I don't suggest taking your youngster to a ballgame that young, they can be very impressionable…..

YOUNG
His bobble at 3rd seemed innocent enough….but was the start of the game winning rally……

KINSLER
What the hell…..does he make a habit of bonehead baserunning when his team trails late in a game??

BIG BAD VLAD
Man, this dude isn't a BAD fielder…..he is a LAZY fielder…..I don't think he has run more than 90 feet in a day, let alone an inning…..shit he made Jose Guillen seem mobile……

NATIONAL PRESS
Just shut the fuck up……shut it and open your goddamn eyes…..

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(The fine print: There will be cussing and bad taste. This is written with the heat of the moment feel you may have during the game, with rational thought sprinkled in now and then. This is entertainment folks, sure there is a lot of truth and I am a genius, but this is all about having a laugh and enjoying the ride…….now lets go heckle Jeff Kent when he gets inducted to Cooperstown..)

by merkin

GAMEBALL and JOKER ==> GIANTS at PHILLIES 10/23 NLCS Game 6

2010-10-24T20:03:00.000-07:00

Man, the fantastic season just keeps on rolling….. looks like my rainy Game 5 with sardine train has resulted in a cold…..been sleeping all day……well, sleeping and rewatching that damn game over and over……. I don't have words to do this feeling justice……the Giants are pennant winners, and are on the doorstep of completing some unfinished business……and guess what…..looks like they are underdogs…..yeah, heard that one before…….this still is baseball my friends……..

GAMEBALL and JOKER ==> GIANTS at PHILLIES 10/23 NLCS Game 6

GAMEBALL

BULLPEN

The Giants might not have had the best top 3 pitchers heading into the playoffs, but few would dispute that this was the deepest staff in terms of quality arms….and that depth paid off with Affeldt coming in for 2 solid innings that really stemmed the Phillies offensive momentum…..and then Bumgarner's high wire act for two innings highlighted by a strikeout looking of Francisco with a runner on 3rd and 1 out……then Lopez retiring Polanco on a flu ball before once again schooling Utley and Howard…..and then Timmy and Wilson….well, hey neither was pretty but they put up goose eggs and that’s the bottom line…..

TIP OF THE CAP :
URIBE
That's the Uribe I have been waiting for…..well, no he wasn't patient at all….but he did make an adjustment…instead of trying to pull everything into the Left Field seats he actually shot the ball to Right Field for a single in the 2nd……and this approach would pay off in the 8th when he hit the go ahead Home Run about 7 angstroms over the right field wall sending the Giants fan base into a frenzy of celebration and then group chanting of counting down the outs while images of Phillies 3 run homers flashed before our eyes on every pitch……

TORRES
After swinging himself out of the lineup against Oswalt in game 2, Andres came back with a single to lead off the 1st….and then a DEEP shot that sailed over Victorino and then bobbled through his arms and off the wall…..for a single……still think he shoulda scored on that hit by Huff……didn't look like he was at full speed and Victorino made a nice charge and got a good bounce

SANCHEZ
Shooting singles all over the field…….but also the bunt that set up the Giants scoring opportunity in the 3rd…..

HUFF
Singled in a run and then a heads up play to score on the errant throw by Polanco…..

DEFENSE
Not spectacular, but solid all around……and with Ross playing balls quickly off the right field and the left center walls took away a couple 90 foot chunks from the Phillies….and that was a big deal in a close game…..

JOKER

SANCHEZ

Bochy has made the analogy about the 2010 Giants being the Baseball version of the Dirty Dozen…..well, if that’s so I think we found our Maggott as Sanchez lost his head and almost derailed our mission into enemy territory last night…..with no idea of a release point and continuing to use his mouth to write checks that his right arm couldn't cash……the best thing he did all night was to get his panties in a bunch and start bitching at Utley, unwittingly giving his replacement time to warm up……man, this guy is an enigma….so talented….looks so good at times, comes up big at times…..but man, what a meltdown…….honestly I think you start him in Game 2 and potentially Game 6 and let him have the friendly confines of San Francisco…he gets the bail out of the pitchers spot coming up…….and if he does blows it at home, you can use the pitchers spot with a pinch hitter…..and thereby gain a small offensive advantage…..as opposed to the DH park….

SMACK OF THE STICK :
PHILLIES HITTING
Now, if I were in the same position I might feel the same way…….but the Phillies didn't magically stop hitting……the finished 2nd in the league in runs scored….and were 2nd in the league in runs scored in September……they demolished the Reds…..and then all of a sudden they didn't show up versus the Giants??? Well that’s how some of the National Press sounds…..almost astounded they didn't steam roll Giants pitching…..and maybe so, but it also seems like there should be just as much if not more credit going to Giants pitching shutting down those very same Phillies Hitters that didn't "show up"….

PHILLIES DEFENSE
Now I don't watch many Phillies games that the Giants aren't involved in…..but I am under the impression that their defense is better than they played…..at least Rollins and Victorino played below my impressions……and THIS was the difference in the series……the Phillies kicked, bobbled, and airmailed their way out of the postseason……

CITIZENS BANK
Sorry, still a joke of a ballpark…..but I'm sure some hitters are thinking the same about ATT……and I will take it…..

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GB and JK ARCHIVES AT THE GIANTS BOARD BLOG

(The fine print: There will be cussing and bad taste. This is written with the heat of the moment feel you may have during the game, with rational thought sprinkled in now and then. This is entertainment folks, sure there is a lot of truth and I am a genius, but this is all about having a laugh and enjoying the ride…….now lets go heckle Jeff Kent when he gets inducted to Cooperstown..)

by merkin

NLCS Game 5 Aftermath

2010-10-22T23:23:00.001-07:00

NLCS Game 5 Aftermath

The offday after the Game 5 loss……Gameball and Joker?....Well really not feeling it, and not really feeling the relevance the day after the Giants were dealt a big blow to their World Series aspirations. The Euphoria was building through the week and was just building into game time yesterday….. About noon yesterday I got a call from a friend that had front row on 3rd base…. now I already had my front row bleachers which I paid a pretty penny for…. but these were seats that some people consider once in a lifetime seats…… I have sat there many a time, but not for what could be a once in a lifetime game……so here I am, with two sets of tickets charged with the task of trying to recover as much cash as I can from the first pair, finish everything I needed to do at work in order to leave early, manage to dump my car at a BART station instead of driving in which is my norm, and getting to the game on time…..lets just say it was a mad scramble of a day…..finally get out of work a little later than I hoped, jumped out of the car and into the BART Train…….once we got to the city I realize I have lost my mitt that dates back to when I actually played baseball…..whatever…..maybe I left it in the car…….

Make it to the park with 20 minutes to game time and get into the MASSIVE Will Call line…….fuck……not going to make first pitch…….rain starts, but I could give a fuck, just need to get into the park……the line moves quickly (thank you Giants employees) and get the tickets without issue…..into the line at the front of the park……THAT moves quickly as well……rush through the park and into the seats just in time for first pitch……fucking awesome……gonna be a great goddamn day…….they might just put this away and I get to be in the middle of a supernova of euphoria…..and without a car, I can do whatever the fuck I want without worrying about traffic or a garage closing or anything……

Now these are sweet fucking seats….. I won't go into detail, but those that know me know where these seats are, and when I am bellowing from this distance I am hard to miss….so I lay into Halladay, but after about an inning I soon realize my voice peaked a couple days back….. still got the volume, but cannot sustain it for more than a few minutes without resting the voice a little…..good thing I some backup…(thx JK and Monkey)…….. heckling alternates from reading back radar guns readings back to Halladay and questioning his velocity, and chanting Cry Baby every time he starts flashing looks at the Ump….. the rain starts……but I could really give a shit……no cap, no jacket, short sleeves, doing my best to yell my ass off ….rain dripping off me, shirt soaked….still clapping and yelling best I can……

Man, they fucking HAD this game…Halladay was on fumes (now we find out injured)…...but a couple gaffe's from Pablo and Huff really open the door, but the Giants are keeping it close and they still got a shot to pull it out,…..yelling until the last out…..and reality set in…..there will be no storybook celebration at home with the streets surrounding 3rd and King pulsing with a euphoric mass of humanity…..no, nothing but a long couple packed train rides home to lick our wounds and return the next day to normality…….some 20 year old kid on the train decided he was the man, and had to impress the females….so he is leading the sardine train in a cheer when he guarantees a World Series…..the crowd responds……honestly, wanted to burst his ignorant bubble…..and this was a distinct possibility as I am NOT shy….and I AM loud (and again, those that know me…..)…..but hey, I am also NOT an asshole….so whatever, let him have his stupid fucking moment, and let the people pretend to rally……but the reality of the whole thing is….its a fucking game…..a goddamn fucking game……and I mean that, not to diminish its importance, but to illustrate that either team can win any night……the bounce of the ball here, a slip of a cleat there, a hard hit ball finding a glove, a bloop falling in, a couple calls by an ump and everything can change…….thats just the way it is……

So what's the point of all this, well…..my bubble has been popped and I have come to terms with the 2010 season…. the Giants hit the road still holding a 3-2 lead…..but based on past history of 1987 and 2002 I have been conditioned to expect the worst……so a part of me has already mourned this season and prepared for the end……Belief? Faith? No, sorry I don't believe in that shit no more…..and you know what…that's all OK……perfectly fine, because I don't play professional baseball for the San Francisco Giants Baseball Club….but I do know a group of 25 people that do, and I know that they could give a shit about Faith and Belief in anything but their abilities……

So tomorrow, we pick up the series in Philadelphia in what is NOT a must win game……yes, for the first time since October 1st, the Giants enter a game that is not a worn out cliché' ……yes, the Giants would do themselves a big favor by ending this tomorrow……but even if they DO lose, they are a team that has faced bone crushing losses all season, without any lasting effects…….this is NOT the 1987 Giants or the 2002 Giants who seemed to fold when the chips were down at the end…..this is the 2010 Giants who have suffered big losses only to bounce back the next day……and just to illustrate the resiliency of the team, think about Game 3 of the NLDS……with a 1 run lead in the 8th, the Giants give up a seeming game winner to Hinske…….but with two down in the 9th, the Giants come up with back to back hits to tie the game…….now I am not saying the Giants are always going to come back….but I tell you what, they are going to fight for every inning, every out, every pitch like professionals…….and as long as they can keep doing that, they just might actually be playing baseball in San Francisco next week……because baseball is just a fucking game, and anything can happen…….

Go Giants!
merkin

PS if you find a beaten old Black Mizuno Fastback Infielders Glove on BART, let me know

GAMEBALL and JOKER ==> GIANTS at PHILLIES 10/20 NLCS Game 4

2010-10-21T00:43:00.001-07:00

FUCK YEAH…. so many thoughts….so many things I want to say…..man it was a wonderful up and down night…..and just too much back and forth for my lungs to handle……by the time the 6th inning rolled around I had lost my voice and given myself a pounding headache from all the noise that I WAS making……but I was able to rally with some lozenges and tasty beverage…..and had enough in the gas tank to make it through yelling the rest of the game…..out of the ballpark……yelling all the way back to the car…..and when I dropped a buddy at the BART station….well there was some yelling there as well……hell I barely needed a car to get home……I just rode that wave of euphoria all the way home……

I have been 1 game from the series 3 times in my life…..in 1987, I was too young to know that we COULD lose…….in 2002….I believed the Giants were MORE talented than the Cardinals …but this is an entirely new feeling…this just doesn't seem real….and I don't think it will even sink in until the offseason……when the season began, we had hopes of a playoff MAYBE…..but the real horizon was 2011…..in mid-August, the Giants pitching swooned and the Padres pulled away and we thought MAYBE a wildcard…..and then now up against a superior Phillies team….it was a MAYBE …..a BIG MAYBE …..this is a team that isn't supposed to be here…..a collection of castoffs and role players augmented by a Stud Rookie Catcher and a Ungodly Good Pitching Staff……you look at the faces in that dugout and it’s a hodpodge of retreds…..you look in that Phillies dugout all I see are all stars…..man….this isn't happening…..this can't be happening…..I can't fucking process this……I swear to god, the more my brain soaks this in, the more my heart lumps up into my throat,…….just fucking typing this, I got fucking tears welling up in my eyes…..man, 1 fucking win,…….just one more fucking 1 and we can maybe….maybe make up for some unfinished goddamn fucking business……fuck……ok, I gotta stop and compose myself here……

OK, got my head on straight again……so lets not think to far ahead here…..the Death Blow is the hardest…..you saw the way the Padres suddenly came to life with the backs against the wall…..well the Phillies are MUCH better than the Padres….and if we lose the 1st one this time, the next two are in Philly……so GET THIS SHIT DONE TOMORROW WITH URGENCY……..you got them down, and you KEEP them down…..you get that Philly Offense rolling and you might not get it to stop again…….

GAMEBALL and JOKER ==> GIANTS at PHILLIES 10/20 NLCS Game 4

GAMEBALL

POSEY

I can't really say much….4 fucking hits…..play at the plate….and loved how he kept his hands back on the ball from Oswalt, something we see too infrequently from Giants hitters…..

TIP OF THE CAP :
URIBE
OUTSTANDING play in the hole, and of course the ball that ended it…..

HUFF
Was stroking it all over tonight….and looks like he may just have his swing back

CODY
This guy is just flat stupid good right now……I mean, playing above your head and you got the stadium chanting your name…..and you sting the ball time after time…..not only does everyone expect Cody to do something….Cody expects Cody to do something

PABLO
Yeah, hit into the DP…..but his swing is looking MUCH better and his WHOLE GAME is looking a lot better…..lets hope he has it back…….there is much work to be done….

WILSON
Got some outs, got the win….has a beard ……some shit like that

JOKER

NO ONE

Not a night to harp on anything or anyone Giants….and I won't dare tempt the baseball gods by singling out any Phillies……..lets just say, this will be a joker free night ……..

SMACK OF THE STICK :
CASILLA/ ROMO
Well……you saw…..I don't need to go into detail tonight

So not feeling me yet……..well, try watching this thing…..yes you have seen it before……but this time, its not about the past….this is about the fucking present……good night, sleep well and MAYBE next time we talk…..well…..lets just say........ MAYBE there will be tears of joy from all Giants fans……..

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(The fine print: There will be cussing and bad taste. This is written with the heat of the moment feel you may have during the game, with rational thought sprinkled in now and then. This is entertainment folks, sure there is a lot of truth and I am a genius, but this is all about having a laugh and enjoying the ride…….now lets go heckle Jeff Kent when he gets inducted to Cooperstown..)

by merkin

GAMEBALL and JOKER ==> GIANTS at PHILLIES 10/19 NLCS Game 3

2010-10-20T00:14:00.000-07:00

Oh Man, great fucking day at the ball yard…. great fucking win…. emotions ran high today as the Giants and Phillies both needed this game to get the upper hand…….the crowd was great and I have to say that I was in rare form today…my voice has rounded into postseason shape and I was bellowing from the front row of Triples Alley letting Werth know whose house this was……had the section of the ballpark rolling……and Jayson's got rabbit ears……hell, even had some of the press guys next to us rolling with the Werth's Randy Powers Mullet……and a quick lesson for the amateurs out there……
1) CLEAR ……Enuciate Enuciate Enuciate
2) CONCISE….. Minimize the Syllables ... say only what is NEEDED to make the point
3) SIMPLE…. don't get all Dennis Miller on us, SAY what you MEAN
4) CHANT……at the end of a heckle, pick a part and CHANT it on repeat……
5) TIME……pick your spot, you aren't going to overcome the crowd or PA system
6) PROJECT……use the diaphragm (TWHS)….and BREATHE OUT HARD……
7) CONTENT…… last and most important…..no swearing, no your mama jokes, and please no SUCK…..SUCK is the refuge of the weak mind…..THINK about your prey and what might bother him……fuck, pick up your goddamn I Phone and Google his ass……..

Go it?.....so don't yell and think anyone more than 2 rows from you can hear anything unless you follow these rules……got it?....great see ya tomorrow for another round…….

and btw, I posted some pics from Today's game here

GAMEBALL and JOKER ==> GIANTS at PHILLIES 10/19 NLCS Game 3

GAMEBALL

CAIN

Shit, almost went to Cody for the gameball out of habit…..but no, today belongs to Matty…..and he was a fucking BEAST out there……GODDAMN I LOVE THIS KID……with a spotty history versus these hitters he came up LARGE with 7 innings of 2 hit ball…….and man, when he buzzed Rollins on an 0-2 pitch in the 2nd……man that set the tone…..Rollins with the base clearing double in game 2 and with his 6 for 10 off Cain….Rollins must have been feeling pretty good……..but now he had something else to think about….and after a couple teasers outside, Cain came back inside with a fastball that was meekly popped to Short…..and then an inning later coming in high and tight to a bunting Hamels…..and then one batter later drilling Victorino……there is no diving across the plate today…..and you now have to respect the hard stuff inside, which opens up the soft stuff away……..man, this kid is a throwback…..you get the sense that he truly dislikes the opposition and especially hitters…..you could see that at the All Star game where he looked like WHY THE FUCK AM I IN THE DUGOUT WITH YOU???? 1/2 the time……he eventually loosened up, but I am sure he was feeling awkward…..good work Cain, big win…..now take a seat and get ready for your next assignment……and lets hope that’s NEXT weekend and not this weekend…..

TIP OF THE CAP :
CODY
The Man……brings his offensive road tour home for the first time…….he left ATT Park a surprise replacement in right……he returns the firmly entrenched incumbent, and a virtual lock to be a member of the 2011 Giants…….

ROW-ROW
Looked like he was guessing up there most of the day……and he guess right 1 time, and that was enough to get himself on the positive side of the ledger……and he, you got to admire this guy for being a team player and pulling for the guys waiting for his chance……yeah, I know he's an overpaid bastard……but still, I will give him some props……

RENT
Single in the 4th was the first of the day and was the started the Giants offense for the day

BURRELL
Drew a big walk following Sanchez's Bunt, in front of Ross's RBI Single…..

SANCHEZ
Got the bunt down in the 4th, and was credited with an Utley Aided RBI Single…..

HUFF
Just out the reach of Utley for the second run of the game

LOPEZ
Righties? Lefties? It don't matter, this kid is getting it done

WILSON
Not always pretty, and often douchy…..but you can't argue with results….

BOCHY
Hey……it worked…….what can you say…….

DEFENSE
Taken for granted for most of the year…….flawless on a tough day with tough sun and shadows and lots of pressue……

JOKER

GHOSTS

Lots of Giants fans are coming out of the woodwork….and hey, there is plenty of room on the bandwagon…..and remember……some of today's bandwagoners are tomorrow's diehards…..but the one thing about the newer Giants fan that gets under my skin is the whole BELIEVE thing….it's not their fault, and I am sure we were all that way at some time……buts that’s NOT the way things work, and as much as I WANT to believe…..thats just not possible……you see being a Giants Fan is NOT easy…….the season doesn't end with a big fucking parade…..all you get is a big fat middle finger year after year after fucking year…….Personally, my first Ghost arrived in the 1987 NLCS….and then 89 then 93 then 97 then 98 then 2000…..and you get the idea……WE DON'T WIN IT ALL, WE CAN'T WIN IT ALL, THAT DOESN’T HAPPEN……yet no matter how many times I tell the stories of heartbreak I can tell, I still here something about how this is different……and yes we have a chance…..we have a very good chance…….but my ghosts won't let me believe until that final out is squeezed , there is a parade down Market Street,….and I can finally call that goddamn 800 number and get my Sports Illustrated Special Edition…hell, maybe they can even throw in a Football Phone……….but sorry kids…….that is STILL a long way off…… keep grinding G-Men…..keep grinding every pitch of every at bat…..and maybe the baseball god might actually show us favor and reward us one and for all……..

SMACK OF THE STICK :
PHILLIES COACHING STAFF
Seemed to me that the Phillies had the same gameplan versus Cain as they had versus Lincecum and Sanchez……wait it out…….sorry Charlie, that's not the smartest thing versus Cain, and I saw many an early hittable strike blow past a passive lineup…Strike 1 was looking for 9 of the first 11 batters.....man, love that shit…Strike 1 is the biggest pitch in baseball…….keep on watching my friends…..you can't hit if you don’t swing the bat….

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GB and JK ARCHIVES AT THE GIANTS BOARD BLOG

(The fine print: There will be cussing and bad taste. This is written with the heat of the moment feel you may have during the game, with rational thought sprinkled in now and then. This is entertainment folks, sure there is a lot of truth and I am a genius, but this is all about having a laugh and enjoying the ride…….now lets go heckle Jeff Kent when he gets inducted to Cooperstown..)

by merkin

GAMEBALL and JOKER ==> GIANTS at PHILLIES 10/17 NLCS Game 2

2010-10-17T23:43:00.001-07:00

Yeah, I'm fucking pissed…… the Giants had a chance to put their fucking throat on the goddamn Phillies necks and they just couldn't get it done…..now if I take a step back and realize that the Giants are coming home for 3 and are still in a very good position to get the job done….maybe I can relax a little….what's done is done……but goddamn, when you have a close game and a chance to go up 2-0 versus a dangerous opponent……you do everything you go to do to get that win…….

GAMEBALL and JOKER ==> GIANTS at PHILLIES 10/17 NLCS Game 2

GAMEBALL

CODY

Again WAS the Giants offense……another Homer……a walk………the two outs made were a hard hit ball to deep center and a K looking on a full count trying to draw a walk with the Giants down by 5…..good work Cody, but can you spread some of that magic around the clubhouse??? These guys look like they could get no-hit in tee-ball…..sure Oswalt was dealing, but he is hittable and even a few baserunners early in the game could have shifted the momentum……but good god, when didn't even get a chance to suck with runners in scoring positions……but I digress….this is Cody's world, we just live in it……

TIP OF THE CAP :
SANCHEZ
One hitter had some success today…..a sharp grounder through the left side and a line drive to center was about a potent as our Non Cody offense got……

SANCHEZ
Following in the footsteps of Wilson and Timmy, was all over the place…..but was able to get off the hook nearly every time…..nasty stuff had the Phillies swinging and missing all night…and he recovered from his early shakes and pitched through the botched popup…....and kept that nasty Phillie offense while he was in the game……

TAKEO SPIKES
Was true to his word, the Georgia native and lifelong Braves fan was seen in a Giants hat in postgame…..a little easier now that the Braves were sent home….of course if I was a Braves fan I would be pissed…..

DESEAN JACKSON
Electric Philly Wideout went down hard with a head injury……no one wants to see that, even if they are playing for Philly…….and plus he's a Cal Bear…….get well soon……..and no, he's not on my fantasy football team…..

JOKER

DEFENSE

FUCK…..this is NOT how a championship team plays…just fucking bush league……wild throw in the 1st from Fontenot……Huff doesn't come off the bag to make a play and gets lucky when it hits the runner…….and hell, Huff has played enough first base to know to come off the bag and give it a swipe…..maybe he gets him, I don't know……but this is the fucking playoffs…..you make these plays or go home……and we're not done yet…..but when you let the jackrabbit Rollins lead off the inning with a dropped popup in the middle of the goddamn diamond???? I think the bulk of that has to be on Fontenot for not taking charge…..but some of that goes to Sanchie for not yelling something……but the killer was the cutoff from Huff……the throw was good and on target with time for Posey to make a play……but Huff makes the instinctive play looking at the runner and the 3rd base coach……can't really blame him for that, but somebody has to be fucking helping him out…..he can't see Oswalt going……man…..just fucking bush league……we were in a close one and we let the Phillies pull away…….and good god, will someone move Fontenot off 3rd…..he is lost over there, even Pablo with his 1 miscue that cost us in Game 2 of the NLDS would be an improvement over this shit….the guy is miscast as a 3rd baseman…..yes, I know he played over 300 innings at 3rd for the Cubs in 09-10…but guess what….the Cubs fucking suck………

SMACK OF THE STICK :
SANCHEZ
His control was the death of him tonight…..walking in the run in the 1st after a couple walks and an error…..and then running up high pitch counts early in the game made for an 7 inning hook after a single to the opposing pitcher…….and once Sanchez was out, the merry go round began……

IASSONGA
Good god, do ALL the umpires suck? I mean really, I am not where the strike zone was half the time….good god, seems like they have gotten worse in the postseason…..

TORRES
Man, he is dragging…..he is swing so late I am not sure if he is swinging late on the last pitch or early on the next pitch…..he was THE MAN when the Giants were scuffling for runs this year…..things have gotten so bad that some Giants fans are seriously calling for Rowand in the lineup……yes, seriously……

RAMIREZ
Gave up the single to Polanco to plate Oswalt

CASILLA
Well…..lets just say he's lucky that ball didn't get out…..

BOCHY
When things go bad, the Manager usually catches some heat……and maybe there was no way out of there……but I got to say when you intentionally walk 2 in an inning and they both score…..well, you picked the wrong matchup……personally I was thinking Affeldt v Rollins……but you coulda done Casilla v Werth…..instead with the bases juiced and the wild Casilla down 2-0 to Rollins and the bases juiced……well, he got a fastball…..give Rollins some credit, it was a good fastball at the knees…..but still, everyone in a 3000 mile radius knew what was coming…….

GIANTS FACEBOOK
This is just asking for karmic shit OK its cute to take pics of Giants hats IN FRONT of Phillies landmarks…..but putting a cap ON Rocky's statue is over the line in my book…. smacks of when the Dodger fans tried to dry hump the Willie Mays statue……yes, I know Rocky isn't a real person, but don't tell that to Phillies fans….hell I think he is leading the polls for a Senate Seat…..wait, shouldn't laugh about that…..I live in CAL LI FOR NI A………

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GB and JK ARCHIVES AT THE GIANTS BOARD BLOG

(The fine print: There will be cussing and bad taste. This is written with the heat of the moment feel you may have during the game, with rational thought sprinkled in now and then. This is entertainment folks, sure there is a lot of truth and I am a genius, but this is all about having a laugh and enjoying the ride…….now lets go heckle Jeff Kent when he gets inducted to Cooperstown..)

by merkin

GAMEBALL and JOKER ==> GIANTS at PHILLIES 10/16 NLCS Game 1

2010-10-16T23:22:00.000-07:00

Great Win, Big Win…..Fuck yeah……the Giants playing the ironic role of David to the Phillies Goliath score first blood deep in the belly of the beast versus their Ace of Aces…..More than just a Win for the Giants, as that first win is always the hardest and if there were any doubters…….well, lets just say this is now looking clearly like a dog fight……..but lets not get ahead of ourselves…….this is still just 1 win versus a very very good team…..certainly a big win, but it kinda feels like winning the first game in a playoff series versus one of those Michael Jordan Bulls teams…..yes, you know you can play with them now…….but there is a long way to go, and you know they are going to come right at ya,……..but guess what G Fans……the Giants got some momentum and a real chance to get a real lead in this series with another W tomorrow……..ANOTHER BIG BIG Game…….but expect the Phillies to fight tooth an nail for everything……

GAMEBALL and JOKER ==> GIANTS at PHILLIES 10/16 NLCS Game 1

GAMEBALL

CODY

A mear 45 days ago I wrote these words…." that is simply a ball you must catch…….and our newcomer is the joker" …of course I was also smart enough to follow that skewering with this…."but I still rather see him play RF over the Sloth that is Guillen" Of course then I certainly knew that not only would he come up with big hits against the hottest pitcher on the Braves staff to send the Giants to the NLCS…….but he would also come up with a 2 homer game versus the Best fucking pitcher in the goddamn National League…….but seriously, this kid has done more damage in the last 2 games than Guillen did in a month of starting……and the way he is swinging the bat one starts to think of those unlikely postseason performances that have propelled champions of the past…..Lemke, Hatcher (Billy or Mickey), dare I even say Mazeroski???? Well getting ahead of myself a little bit here……but Ross is smoking hot right now….lets just hope this streak carries on for a couple more weeks……

TIP OF THE CAP :
BURRELL
Brings his A game to Philly……after being swinging wildly at strike 3 in his first AB…..he flared an single down the right field line…….but the real damage was in the 6th where he laced a Double off Ibanez wrist as he cozied up against the left field wall…..and then Burrell stand in scored the 4th run of the night on a Uribe 47 bouncer up the middle…..

URIBE
Hey, may not have been the prettiest single in the world, but it was well placed and did the job……..and at least he didn’t K…….remember kids, good things happen when you put the ball in play……at least with 2 down and a runner on 2nd…..

LOPEZ
Anyone still miss Bowker?

TIMMY
Man…….he looked like August Timmy out there most of the night……but you got to hand it to the kid…..when going was tough, he was fucking nails……just filthy nasty stuff out there……with control all over the place….with a fastball that seemed to be fading away…….he went back out there for the 7th and put an exclamation point on a solid outing that could have easily been a nightmare……way to gut it out…….

WILSON
As if taking a cue from Timmy's performance……Brian was wild as hell, but in the end just way to filthy to handle…..getting 4 outs with 4 K's with lots of torture mixed in

BOCHY
Sent Timmy up to hit in the top of the 7th and then back out there in the 7th when most of the Western World thought he was gassed…..a number of times when we have seen Tim dip below that 90 mark on his fastball, he has proceeded to fall apart…..but this time he came back out there and looked everybit the September Timmy we have gotten used to…….and then pulling Burrell for Nate with 2 down in the top of the 6th…..well that seemed to me a lot like going for a 2 point conversion when up by 5 in the middle of the 3rd quarter…..a little early to go into a defensive posture……but hell if it didn't work out…..Pat might not score that 4th run and the pen was able to hold off the Phillies and make that move look brilliant……..I still don't like it, but it worked…..so what can I say……if I was managing it would likely be tied 3-3 in the bottom of the 32nd inning right now

JOKER

CITIZENS BANK

I left Citizens Bank Park with 3 solid impressions……first, this park is a goddamn bankbox…..corners are short and the balls fly…….second, the park is very well designed for the fan, comfortable with nice sightlines and a wide open concourse…..and third, the female fans here dress sluttier than any baseball fans I have seen……Now two of those things I can appreciate…….but good god, this park is hitter friendly……I don't want to hear about your park factors and all that….I know what I see and the ball just fucking flies out of this park…….and tonight the Phillies took advantage with a couple opposite field wall scrapers that are maybe doubles in a fairer ballpark……but hey, that’s the park, thems the rules and the Phillies took advantage…..still doesn't change the fact that it pisses me off…….and on a side note, I do have to repeat that this is a really nice ballpark to watch a game in……and for the most part the fans were pleasant and friendly……of course the Giants were not the visiting team, and as I usually do……I cheer for the home team if the Giants or Dodgers aren't involved…..

SMACK OF THE STICK :
HALLADAY
Big Bad Roy…..lucky to get the ball out of the infield Roy……well, that hype machine sure did build THAT up…..sure Roy is a great pitcher, but far from infallible …and this is the kind of pitcher the Giants actually have a chance against…..its guys like Tim "I can't break a plane of glass with my fastball" Stauffer that drive us nuts……nah, if the Phillies were smart they would sign Rick White out of retirement……and let HIM throw a no hitter against us……..yes, I am still pissed about Rick White, thank you very much…….

COUSINS
Where exactly is the strike zone tonight??? just fucking clueless….and this is the best the umpires union can offer…..now to be fair, there didn't seem to be any rhyme or reason to his incompetence…..calls on both sides of the ledger were blown……

MANUEL
Yes, he still is a douche bag…….but thanks for that whole Lidge thing……the classic bringing in the closer to get work and then he falls apart…..well nearly, but still has got to help the Giants in a future appearance…….and got to love those back to back Utley Howard lineups……yes, I know that’s what he's done all year and why change now…..well sure, I guess……but it sure is nice when you have a weapon like Lopez……and you don't have to swap Planco and Utley like Manuel has toyed with…… you jhust can slip Werth into that 4th spot and Howard back to 5th…..and with Rollins in the 6th spot hitting well from the right side…..well……I guess Werth doesn't look like a cleanup hitter so that will never happen……and that’s fine by me if you keep those two lefties back to back …….

PHILLIES PHANS
First of all, whistles???? Like the Vuvuzella of Philadelphia…..the announcers saying something about whistling at Tim for the hair……ok, great I get it…..but can you fucking cut it out when Halladay is pitching and Tim isn’t even on the goddamn field??? good god, I swear half those fucks probably don't even know what the joke is……I guess Phillies Phans don't approve of Long Haired Athletes……that is unless it comes in the form of a Mullet accompanied by Gay Mustache

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(The fine print: There will be cussing and bad taste. This is written with the heat of the moment feel you may have during the game, with rational thought sprinkled in now and then. This is entertainment folks, sure there is a lot of truth and I am a genius, but this is all about having a laugh and enjoying the ride…….now lets go heckle Jeff Kent when he gets inducted to Cooperstown..)

by merkin

GAMEBALL and JOKER ==> BRAVES at GIANTS 10/10 NLDS Game 4

2010-10-11T23:17:00.000-07:00

Awesome…. just fucking awesome……after sulking out of ATT Park on Friday Night and dragging myself back home……sulking into work on Saturday…..knocking out the day before sulking back home………then the Rally on Sunday morning, telling myself if we can just win 1 in Atlanta…..just win 1……I headed into the City to take in the game at the Public House……ran into the crowd from McCovey Chronicles……Man……that was the BIG game……lose and you are on the brink, win and you are guaranteed to return home……the ups and downs of Hinske, Huff, and Conrad left me euphoric and drained……dragged myself home and passed out……into work today with a spring in my step…..knowing if we didn't put it away today, we would be back home in a couple days…….but fuck that, you want to finish it now…..and goddamn it if they didn't do it and put us through to the FUCKING NLCS BABY…….thats the REAL playoffs if you ask me…..That 5 game wham bam thank you Brooks Conrad, is like the Cliff Notes to the playoffs…..the 7 game series where the winner gets a World Series Berth and a Pennant……now THAT'S worth getting excited about……and I got to tell you, as the reality of it all is sinking in……I got a lump in my throat…..this has been one hell of a season……and pretty soon, it could be something really fucking special…….

GAMEBALL and JOKER ==> BRAVES at GIANTS 10/10 NLDS Game 4

GAMEBALL

CODY

Man, I just couldn't believe it when Cody made that roster instead of Guillen….could it be that the Front Office isn't filled idiots and ass clowns? And man has Cody been LARGE for the Giants, and tonight he broke Lowe's spell with a laser shot over the left field wall to put the Giants on the board and get the ball rolling on Offense…..and then an inning later….with the bases juiced came up with the hit to put the Giants in the lead for good…..loved what this guy did for the Marlins….and glad to have him on our side……

TIP OF THE CAP :
BUM
The "other" rookie stud on the Giants……A little shaky in the 2nd and 3rd, but kept the Giants in the game long enough to get the lead and hand the ball over the bullpen corps……

CASILLA
Mean nasty shit…….he was money once he got past that first 9 pitch at bat…..turning in 1 2/3rd solid in a high pressure situation….

LOPEZ
Man……in my book Bowker and Martinez were worth less than watching that 1 at bat of schooling the Phenom Braves right fielder…….

TIMMY
Always good for an on air F Bomb when the bubbly if flowing….this time with Flem on KNBR…….

COX
Class act, nice guy, hall of fame career……butt load of wins…..if you want more, I suggest Wikipedia

WILSON
Say what you will, but he was on the mound when the Giants advanced…..and that’s worth something

ASHTON
This is kinda cool, assuming you haven't already seen it….. Three or Four years??? Try fucking 56 years……but that being said, tip that cap to a well done vid…….

JOKER

CONRAD

Boo fucking hoo…..come on, man Brooks just flat out blew it……yeah, out of position….Heyward should called him off…..and all that shit……whatever man…..hey, the Braves fans are a forgiving bunch and Brooks had a good year so there is some love…..and more power to them…..but put this guy in Boston, Chicago, Philly, New York, or Boston and the mobs with torches and pitchforks are knocking down on the door……heck, put this guy in San Francisco and he is likely railroaded out of town…..being a nice guy and having one good year don't forgive shit like that….this is Major Fucking League Baseball man….there is plenty of time for forgiveness and appreciation 20 years from now…..there is something to be said for a fanbase that has Heroes to celebrate and Villains to revile…. ask Jose Cruz about that Gold Glove and his career year in 2003……and yeah honestly, I do feel for Jose……but in the same breath I am still cursing his name……and better Brooks than one of our own…..and I make no apologies……

SMACK OF THE STICK :
WILSON
Good god man……you are the best fucking closer in the National League……we are only asking for 1 clean inning……good god, do you have to torture us???? I guess we all know the answer…..

TORRES
Hey, I got mad love for Andres…..but 6 K's in 4 games and 1-3 in stolen bases ain't getting it done, and this team is going to need you soon…..so get it together and lets get it done my man……

URIBE
I was looking forward to a focused Uribe bearing down and giving us good at bats…..instead he gets worked on the outside half of the plate……and instead of going with the pitch, he just crowds the plate and yanks everything……yeah, I know that’s what he has done all year……but then again, I have seen him bear down and get long at bats and go the other way when the game called for it…..maybe I'm dreaming but I still think he may have some surprises left for us this year……..

HEYWARD
Wow…….in a meek Braves lineup, Hewyard could have been the game changer in this hard fought low scoring series…….instead, he racks up 7 K's in 12 hitless at bats……and in the final game when he finally breaks through with a couple hits……he is schooled in the 8th with the tying run in scoring position with 2 down…….

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(The fine print: There will be cussing and bad taste. This is written with the heat of the moment feel you may have during the game, with rational thought sprinkled in now and then. This is entertainment folks, sure there is a lot of truth and I am a genius, but this is all about having a laugh and enjoying the ride…….now lets go heckle Jeff Kent when he gets inducted to Cooperstown..)

by merkin

GAMEBALL and JOKER ==> BRAVES at GIANTS 10/07 NLDS Game 1

2010-10-08T00:19:00.000-07:00

Man, finally made it home…tired, voice is cracking and I got to get some sleep before work so this will be quick

GAMEBALL and JOKER ==> BRAVES at GIANTS 10/07 NLDS Game 1

GAMEBALL

TIMMY

I have watched opening days and his all star appearance with an eye towards how he might handle the adrenaline hit of a postseason appearance…..well, looks like he took to post season 100 times better….man, what a fucking performance, I was just hoping he would get out of the 1st and have a good start and give the Giants a chance to win…….but instead, Timmy was just lights out nasty…..and there was no way he was coming out……this was his game, and he was going to bring that mother home……

TIP OF THE CAP :
POSEY
2 hits and a "stolen base"…..I didn't see the replays and was too far away to see if he was out…..I know nothing

ROSS
The roster move pays off with an RBI single in a game where 1 run seemed like 10….

STEVE PERRY
For all the smack I talked, I admit when I saw him in pregame I did high five him and likely scare the crap out of him as I discussed my enthusiasm for the Giants…..but the tip of the cap …. Steve didn't depart for his Suite or even Field Club…..he was headed to Lower Box to watch the game with the masses……

FANS
On fucking fire…..man, the "PO-SEY'S BET-TER" clap clap…clap clap clap…..fucking cracking my ass up……classic…….

JOKER

COX

Congrats on your great career, and good luck on your retirement……so, what was that whole walking of Pablo about????.....yeah, that worked out…..

SMACK OF THE STICK :
ANKIEL
Had some fun heckling from the first row of CF bleachers….10 years and 4 days removed from the NLDS meltdown… Hey, it’s a great comeback story…..but fair game for heckle material

CONRAD
As an infielder, he is a great DH…….

GUILLEN
Finally, someone comes to their senses……thank you whatever, however this happened…..I was jumping off a bridge if his defense cost us in a close series…..

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(The fine print: There will be cussing and bad taste. This is written with the heat of the moment feel you may have during the game, with rational thought sprinkled in now and then. This is entertainment folks, sure there is a lot of truth and I am a genius, but this is all about having a laugh and enjoying the ride…….now lets go heckle Jeff Kent when he gets inducted to Cooperstown..)

by merkin

GAMEBALL and JOKER ==> Pads at Giants 10/03

2010-10-04T00:18:00.000-07:00

Man, what a fucking weekend……with Tons of Work due on Monday, I had it all figured out……Tickets for Friday and Saturday, and then work on Sunday…..Confident the Giants would clinch it Friday….and when that didn't happen, Saturday was a sure thing…….and then reality set in……Those Fucking Giants dropped the first two goddamn games of the series and now I was screwed……but determined to see the Giants finish the season, I went from Saturdays game into work overpaid for tickets to Sunday's game and then started plowing…..with the help of CL (thanks sweetie) we were able to knock out everything that was needed for Monday….and around midnight I headed home bleery eyed, just hoping my efforts and would pay off……and what a fucking pay off it was……man what a day, Giants clinch the West and setup a home field for the first round…..and then the Victory lap was the cherry on top……my splurge on front row seats paid off, as I got to press the flesh with the whole goddamn roster…..man, that was too fucking sweet ……just fucking surreal……I can't believe they took it all the way to the last day of the season and still managed to pull this shit out…….

GAMEBALL and JOKER ==> Pads at Giants 10/03

GAMEBALL

SANCHEZ

A friend who is in a position to know…told me that inside the bill of Sanchez's No Hitter Cap in the Hall of Fame there is an inscription which is hidden from public view….in Spanish it is written…."Just Another Fucking Game"……and that was exactly how Jon needed to approach todays game…..trying to pick up the team after 2 back to back losses…the Giants faced a 3 way tie that would have at best left a Giants roster weary heading into the post season……but instead Jon navigated through a couple innings before stroking a triple to the alley in Right Center to key a 2 run rally…..and then game back out in the 4th and shut down the Pads…..so for the Triple and the 5 shutout innings, Jon gets today's gameball…….

TIP OF THE CAP :
SANCHEZ
Got the base knock to pick up Torres who failed to score the runner on Third with 1 out…..

HUFF
Followed Sanchez's RBI Single, with a double to the left center gap out of the reach of Denorfia

WILSON
Came in the 9th with a 3 run lead and 42,000+ believers in the house……
BULLPEN
Just fucking shut down solid…….I can get used to this……

PABLO
Made the risky play to 2nd, but it worked out…..and I was just happy he thought to step on 3rd before throwing this time…..

POSEY
Not for the insurance homer, but for jumping higher than any white man alive while wearing catchers gear……

JOKER

EVERITT

What a fucking tool…..I was sitting about 15 feet from where the ball hit, and as I watched the ball hit the line and kick up chalk my first thought was to make sure no one touched the ball as I celebrated the double…..and then….hey why is Bochy on the field…..what do you mean he called it foul, it was obviously fair……what the hell??? man, the easiest call on the field…..Ball HITS line, you SEE white shit kick up…..good god, I was just shocked he could make such a stupid call….I am actually sitting here watching Tivo, and I see ball hit line, I see me leaning out over the wall making a fair call and watching the ball go by into the corner at the same time Everitt is making the foul call…..good god, this guy seriously needs to get his eyes checked…I mean seriously, this guy makes calls for a living…how can you blow such a fucking easy call……what a fucking tool

SMACK OF THE STICK :
LATOS
What a fucking ass clown…..first off, tanking down the stretch…..next he pops off about the Giants….and then with the Padres post season hopes in the balance, he gives it up to the opposing pitcher……man, just fucking classic….now I read how he "grew up" this year…..give me a fucking break, this guy has all the talent in the world, but unless he learns to shut his mouth and let his game do the talking….he is heading to Vicente Padilla land…..talented and hated by the opposition and teammates alike…..

Fuck Yeah Giants fans…..what a fucking weekend…..what a fucking ride…….and its not over yet….Already got my tickets lined up for the postseason…….but lets enjoy this moment just a little longer before the real business of the postseason begins……

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(The fine print: There will be cussing and bad taste. This is written with the heat of the moment feel you may have during the game, with rational thought sprinkled in now and then. This is entertainment folks, sure there is a lot of truth and I am a genius, but this is all about having a laugh and enjoying the ride…….now lets go heckle Jeff Kent when he gets inducted to Cooperstown..)

by merkin

GAMEBALL and JOKER ==> DBacks at Giants 09/29

2010-09-30T00:11:00.001-07:00

The days grow short and I must admit that I am kinda sorta glad the Padres won tonight…..yes, I certainly want this over and locked away……but with the Magic # now at 3 the Giants must clinch ON THE FIELD and Versus the last team to be eliminated….…..if the Padres had lost tonight there was a possibility the Giants could clinch with a Padres loss Thursday Night long after the Giants were on the field Thursday Day……hey, I will take a Division Title anyway I can get it……but part of me is glad that IF it comes, it will be sweet…….

GAMEBALL and JOKER ==> DBacks at Giants 09/29

GAMEBALL

PAT

Earl Weaver couldn't have scripted it better…..pitching, defense, and the 3 run homer…..and tonight that Homer was a BOMB in the 4th inning off the bat of Pat…..man, can you believe that Tampa just let this guy go…..and not just that, he signed with the Giants and agreed to prove himself all over again in AAA for a couple weeks……this guys bat and eye haven't aged a day as far as I can see…..sure he's not stellar in Left…..but fuck the damn defensive metrics, I will take that power bat in the lineup any day of the week…….good work Mr Burrell…..and now lets sew up this division……..

TIP OF THE CAP :
TIMMY
Bounced back from a leadoff shot by Drew to go 7 strong in what was likely his last regular season appearance at ATT in 2010……

HUFF
2 hits including a single in front of Burrells BOMB

POSEY
The work has ground down his bat speed, but still found a way to contribute offensively working a walk……something tells me an early clinch will do wonders for his bat in the postseason…….

WILSON
The man…..enough said

SANDOVAL
His swing is coming around……yes we have said this time and time again, but at least for the moment he is spraying line drives around the field…

JOKER

THE TEASE

You GOTTA love Giants fans…..as you look around baseball, fans of the teams heading to the playoffs are using words like Destiny and Believe…….but Giants fans???? no, this is a team that I think is even more jaded than the Cubs faithful……The mood of Giants fans right now is elated to be sure…..but as the Giants get closer to reality with the clinch, I think the mood of the Fans will shift to more along the lines of…..can we JUST get past that First Round??? man, I swear I wouldn't be surprised to see someone show up with a sign saying "HOW THEY GONNA SCREW US THIS TIME"……well the Giants haven't yet clinched the division…..but they have already assured us of one thing……this will either be the greatest year in the history of the San Francisco Giants……or just another in a long line of heart breaks…….but hey, I get ahead of myself…..enjoy these last few games of the Regular Season, and if the Giants get there…..enjoy the playoffs……they will come and go faster than you think, and one can only hope that it finally ends with that parade down Market Street…..

SMACK OF THE STICK :
LATOS
Back to the regular season for a moment…..lets enjoy the downfall of a team that has tormented us in the last few years…..and the Pads are sure making it sweet….. I assume you have read Latos comments this kid skull is as think as his arm is talented…..love to see the ace of the Padres staff follow his meltdown in September with sour grapes……..

AGONZALEZ
Man, this keeps getting better……them Padres aren't showing any signs of a last stand…. Hell their best hitter is already making plans to jump ship…... Hell Yeah you would be interest in offers….come on, who wouldn't…..but you are smart enough not to answer the question…..that is unless you are trying to help expedite your way out of town……so A Gon, ever consider San Francisco???

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(The fine print: There will be cussing and bad taste. This is written with the heat of the moment feel you may have during the game, with rational thought sprinkled in now and then. This is entertainment folks, sure there is a lot of truth and I am a genius, but this is all about having a laugh and enjoying the ride…….now lets go heckle Jeff Kent when he gets inducted to Cooperstown..)

by merkin

GAMEBALL and JOKER ==> DBACKS at GIANTS 09/28

2010-09-28T23:42:00.000-07:00

Man, its been a while… work is finally lightening up some, got my head above water and the brain is still functioning late in the day……but you don't want to hear about that……you want to hear about the GODDAMN GIANTS……Fucking Amazin…..right when the Padres and Rockies pitching staffs have gone south, the Giants staff has found its form and hung around long enough to peak their nose past the Padres as they close on the finish line…….that's 5 games left people, and I think I finally smell a Division Title and a Postseason in San Francisco…

GAMEBALL and JOKER ==> PADRES at GIANTS 09/28

GAMEBALL

NATE

Man, hell of a year for Nate…..all last offseason he was penciled in as the starting Right Fielder only to be beat out by Bowker in spring…..getting shots to play here and there he never put together a big enough hot streak to convince the brass he was the answer in right…..he has take up residence in Ishikawavilla by being reduced to Jose Guillen's caddy and pinch hitter…..and much like Ishikawa, he hasn't bitched or moaned, just gone out and made the best of his role…..and tonight Nate came up with THE hit of the night with a pinch hit 2 out RBI single to Left Center to plate the lead run that would prove to be the game winner……Bit hit on a big night, and way to keep your head in the game kid…..

TIP OF THE CAP :
FAN IN RIGHT
Fucking hilarious…..Cole Gillespie falls into the stands and drops the catch….the fan grabs the ball and pops up to show the Umpire no catch as the surrounding fans lobby for the call……of course Jose grounds out a couple pitches later….but that was a couple more pitches in the inning the Giants took the lead and chased Lopez from the game…..

TORRES
A welcome sight at the top of the order and flying around center field…..Got the Giants on the board with a Triple in the 3rd to get that 1st run of the game, always the hardest run to get…..

URIBE
Big Fly tied the game in the 4th to tie his career high with 23 dingers….not bad for a offseason afterthough "reserve" infielder

PABLO
Suddenly looks good with a pair of hard hit doubles…..don't think, just swing……

RAMIREZ
Came in with a dominant inning after the Giants took the lead

WILSON
with one of those throw back saves…..man this guy is a horse…..can we talk about him in the same breath as Nen and Beck yet? I think so……

SANCHEZ
Was a bit shaky at times, but he has at least gotten better at avoiding implosion….and that’s a BIG deal for a starter……

JOKER

LATOS

Man, the Ace of the Padres has lead the retreat in September……Big Bad Fucking Latos ….with his 15 straight starts with 2 runs or less allowed came into the Game versus the Giants in San Diego and got his streak broken and tagged with the loss…..the first of his new streak of 4 losses in a row……and during that time he has given up 20 runs in 4 games just when the Padres needed him most……and now Latos is lined up for one more start of the season…….the Final Day of the regular season in San Francisco…..and if that game is still relevant, is there any reason to believe that Latos will break that new streak, or will just continue the meltdown?......well either way, lets hope they clinch before Sunday and get a little rest before October…..

SMACK OF THE STICK :
COLE GILLESPIE
Looked like he might have had that Torres Triple gloved and looked like he had that Guillen foul gloved….and both times had the ball pop out of the mitt……dude, hire a professional to form that pocket for you, you got fucking skillet hands out there……

ROCKIES
Wow…..after a hard late charge…..with Tulowitski and CarGo in the middle of the lineup,…with Ubaldo leading the staff……with Street and De La Rosa back from injury to bolster the staff…..everyone thought that the Rockies were going to be there at the end……well, they pulled up lame around the last turn and were mathematically eliminated from contention tonight…..and that’s a good thing…..a hot Rockies team would have been feared in the NL Playoffs……now, if the Giants make it the only team to fear is the Phillies……I take my chances with anyone else right about now

PS
On a final note, not only did the Giants catch the Padres in the standings…..the Giants have now pulled into a tie with the Padres for the league lead for fewest runs allowed……all square at 571…….

And here is the updated graph…..

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(The fine print: There will be cussing and bad taste. This is written with the heat of the moment feel you may have during the game, with rational thought sprinkled in now and then. This is entertainment folks, sure there is a lot of truth and I am a genius, but this is all about having a laugh and enjoying the ride…….now lets go heckle Jeff Kent when he gets inducted to Cooperstown..)

by merkin

GAMEBALL and JOKER ==> BREWERS at GIANTS 09/18

2010-09-19T00:15:00.000-07:00

Pathetic, just fucking pathetic…..just when I thought the Giants offense might be back on track, we get this….. back to back nothing efforts versus the Brewers….the pitching has been brilliant and we aren't asking for 10 runs a night, but good god when the Giants scored their 1st run it was almost as if the heavens opened and angels decended to serenaded us with the Hallelujah Chorus ……..of course if the Giants had scored a second run a wild pack of rabid badgers would have flown out of my fucking ass…..and now, no one wanted to see that…….

GAMEBALL and JOKER ==> BREWERS at GIANTS 09/18

GAMEBALL

PEN

The bright spot of the night was the pen getting some work in and keeping the Giants in the game…..Ramirez, Ruzler, Romo, and Wilson all put in good efforts…….in my opinion right now this pitching staff from top to bottom is the best in baseball and that’s going to keep the Giants in the race even if the offense continues its slump……

TIP OF THE CAP :
BOCHY
For pulling Timmy after 5, was the right move for a team desperate for runs

JOKER

PABLO

Sure if the Giants could score some goddamn runs, maybe this wouldn't even be on teh radar.....and maybe you don't even agree, but there is no way Pablo made the right play in the 4th……now I have seen this a few times this year, and I am sure you have as well…..on every fucking pitch you got to think the situation…..in this case if it’s slow hit check home and go to first…..if its medium hit or hard hit away from the bag then go home…….but on a sharp hit ball 1 step from the bag, shuffle step and plant on the bag and fire to first…..I don't fucking care of Carl Lewis is running, on that ball you HAD TIME to shuffle and throw…..the mental error wasn't making the wrong choice, the mental error was not thinking BEFORE the play…..you don't have time to think after the ball is in your mitt, you react……and Pablo at times has no idea what he is doing out there……

SMACK OF THE STICK :
URIBE
Stranded runners at 3rd in two straight at bats
BUCKNER
One pitch doesn't make a game…..but that strike zone was moving all day…..and hell, by my count that looked like ball 5, not strike 2…….

BOCHY
For putting Uribe in the 2 hole and Ross in the 8th…somehow that seems upside down, and probably to them as well…..

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(The fine print: There will be cussing and bad taste. This is written with the heat of the moment feel you may have during the game, with rational thought sprinkled in now and then. This is entertainment folks, sure there is a lot of truth and I am a genius, but this is all about having a laugh and enjoying the ride…….now lets go heckle Jeff Kent when he gets inducted to Cooperstown..)

by merkin

GAMEBALL and JOKER ==> DODGERS at GIANTS 09/16

2010-09-16T23:57:00.001-07:00

FUCK YEAH…..1st place by themselves in September…..15 games left and anything could happen……but with the Padres fading, the biggest threat to Giants Postseason is the Rockies……and lost in the Giants take over of first place in the West is the fact they are now in a flat footed tie for the Wild Card Lead with the Braves……I don't want to jinx anything, but I got to say I like our chances…..and if we make it to the postseason, this team CAN do some damage…….

GAMEBALL and JOKER ==> DODGERS at GIANTS 09/16

GAMEBALL

HUFF

The Dodgers early lead was quickly answered with a deep shot into triples alley that turned into a run, and then next time around in the order Huff crushed one through the fog and over the bricks to give the Giants a lead for good……Huff has been THE MVP of this club, and talk about Posey or Torres is just that, talk…..no Doubt this 2010 Giants team revolves around Huff's all around game and clubhouse presence……

TIP OF THE CAP :
POSEY
Since his arrival, the Golden Child has been Huff's wingman…..Seems like when the Giants offense is going good, Posey is knocking Huff home anytime Huff doesn't bring himself home……and it was that way tonight with Posey's picking up Huff with 2 out in the 1st…..and then following Huff's 3 run shot with 1 of his own……and Man, Posey has LEGIT power, did I mention this before…..and love that Back to Back homer on the 5th pitch of the AB…..man, Posey worked that count so far it barely felt like back to back……

SANCHEZ, J
Close runnerup to the gameball…..Things could have gotten ugly quickly after Uribe's errant throw in the 1st…..but Sanchez went 0-2 on the next two hitters before striking them out and then got Loney 0-1 before a sharp ground out…..the Dodgers wouldn't msuter a threat until the Giants had a 5 run lead and perhaps Jonathan's concentration wavered a little……

RENT
The bunt ahead of Huff's bomb was a masterful sneak attack…..tack on 3 more hits for a 4 hit night in a romp, and lets hope Edgar gets himself a little hot streak going

SANCHEZ, F
Doubled to left in front of Huff's tater, walked with the bases juiced, and then doubled home a couple of his own to give the Giants a 10 spot…..

GUILLEN
With his lack of speed, shoddy defense, and garbage time numbers, I just haven't warmed up to the guy……but he hit the SHIT out of that ball……he would make one hell of a bat off the bench in the postseason…..but having him play right field on a day in day out basis is like having a Pit Bull watch your children….

JOKER

DOGGIES

Fucking Dodgers……yes they realigned the rotation to stack the deck against the Giants…..but now comes the Kicker…..they play 9 of their remaining 15 games versus the Rockies and Padres……and 6 of those are against the Rockies…….what are the odds that they even come up with a couple wins versus those teams……heck, we will probably field their B lineup just try to fuck us over……but you know what…..Giants have the lead, have head to head games with the Padres and Rockies and hold their destiny in their hands……

SMACK OF THE STICK :
JOURNEY
Yeah, we know……first the White Sox and then the Dodgers ….."I see her in a smoky room……" Fuck you Journey. I will kick you sorry turncoat asses in that smoky room…….Nope, the Giants have my approval on this one, the song they are playing after the Foghorn subsides and the Water cannons have shot their wad……Fuck Yeah, you don't hear a funky bassline like that from Neal Schon's boys and there is something about a funky bassline that says homerun trot…….good work Giants Inc……

URIBE?
Nah……fuck it, we can let that slide for the day……Juan has been a fucking clutch part moved all over the infield……15 more games my man, lets go get em

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(The fine print: There will be cussing and bad taste. This is written with the heat of the moment feel you may have during the game, with rational thought sprinkled in now and then. This is entertainment folks, sure there is a lot of truth and I am a genius, but this is all about having a laugh and enjoying the ride…….now lets go heckle Jeff Kent when he gets inducted to Cooperstown..)

by merkin

GAMEBALL and JOKER ==> DODGERS at GIANTS 09/15

2010-09-16T00:02:00.000-07:00

You may not have noticed, but many of the postseason races are pretty close to being wrapped up….according to the Baseball Prospectus playoff odds the Yankees Rays Rangers and Twins at least a 97% chance of making the playoffs……and in the NL the Reds are at 98% and the Phillies at 92%....which leaves the Padres Braves Rockies and Giants battling for the last two spots in the tourney……so as we head down the stretch, expect to see the Giants at the top of Sportscenter…..at least on the days that Clinton Portis isn't talking about 53 packages ….and I gotta think that Clinton would be a perfect spokesperson for UPS…..

GAMEBALL and JOKER ==> DODGERS at GIANTS 09/15

GAMEBALL

CAIN

What's left to say…..Matt Cain was quietly efficient and dominant…..going 7 strong on 91 pitches…..walking none and allowing just 3 singles……yes Cain was in control all night and he wasn't letting anyone near 2nd base…..which is about all he has in common with the Jonas Brothers…..wait….what does that actually mean??? What would be second base on a guy anyway ….and what does that have to do with Huff's thong…..all things I really don't wanna know…..

TIP OF THE CAP :
FONTENOT
For a moment looked like he had broke through with a drive in the 5th that brought Gibbons to his knees on the warning track……then was finally able to plate that 1st run of the night in the 7th with a fist shot over whoever the hell was the second baseman for the Dodgers……Hey, its September……it's all a blur……

ISHI
Pinch hitter extraordinaire with the 1 out double pinch hitting for Cain

HUFF
Double and nice slide at home to give the Giants a cushion they sorely needed….

ROMO
3 up 3 down, 6 pitches 6 strikes……I think he is on a roll…….

JOKER

GIANTS FANS

Yes, you heard me….. the Giants have only drawn 35K in back to back nights…..now that would be great for some teams, but in the heat of the race versus their bitter historical rival I expect better than that…………yes, it’s a weekday…..yes, school is back in session…..yes, ballgames ain't cheap…..but I expect these to be sellouts or very close to…..I admit I have been guilty as well, but unusual workloads have kept me into the evening with no chance of going…..I guess it’s the economy in general, it just surprises me that Giants Fans didn't show up large the last couple nights….hell we probably had more Giants Fans this past weekend in San Diego as we had in the stands tonight

SMACK OF THE STICK :
BOCHY
Yes, I understand you wanted to shake things up a bit…..but playing Velez on defense is playing with fire….this is a guy who despite his speed is a liability out there……Honestly, I would rather see Burrell in the leadoff spot with his ability to work a count and draw a walk….hell, give Ford a shot for a game or two….drop a bunt, take some pitches……but hey, I guess with Guillen out of the picture we had to have a butcher in the outfield out there somewhere…..and really a Velez Ross Schierholtz alignment is still probably better than Burrell Torres Guillen…….he just scares the shit out of me….

PABLO
Man he looks lost up there for the last week or so….and tonight was no different, and it seemed like every threat the Giants had ended with Pablo….but hey, at least he hit that last ball slow enough to avoid the DP and draw a throw that Huff was able to beat out…..

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(The fine print: There will be cussing and bad taste. This is written with the heat of the moment feel you may have during the game, with rational thought sprinkled in now and then. This is entertainment folks, sure there is a lot of truth and I am a genius, but this is all about having a laugh and enjoying the ride…….now lets go heckle Jeff Kent when he gets inducted to Cooperstown..)

by merkin

GAMEBALL and JOKER ==> GIANTS at PADS 09/10

2010-09-11T00:10:00.001-07:00

A watershed night for the 2010 Giants as they backed up their opening game with a second in a row versus the Southern LA Padres….yes, a great night but not the time to get overjoyed…..no, now is the time to put your foot on the throat of the Pads and take game 3……and every win is huge this time of year, and not just because it’s the Pads…..but because the NL Playoff landscape is in upheaval… The Braves, Reds, Phillies, Padres, and Giants are all within 2 games of each other and the hard charging Rockies are only 2 back of the Giants in the loss column…….

GAMEBALL and JOKER ==> GIANTS at PADS 09/10

GAMEBALL

HUFF

The battle of 90 feet was won by the Giants tonight…..and Huff snagged the 2 biggest chunks of 90 feet of the night….after being hit by pitch, got a good jump and stole 2nd on Gregerson….and then on a grounder to short gambled and just beat the tag at 3rd…….both pieces of 90 feet could be considered ill advised, but Huff got aggressive decisive jumps both times and as it turns out the gambles were exactly what the Giants needed and brought home the W……

TIP OF THE CAP :
NATE
For blowing up Eckstein like a Chinese Catcher (that was monkey) and likely taking some steam off the DP relay and allowing Huff to score…..

URIBE
For picking it clean at 3rd and legging out the run scoring Fielders choice….even though he got a little too creative trying to break up a home to 1st DP……

WILSON
Well…..not for his hitting…….and he's about 2 weeks of beard growth short of Joaquin Phoenix …..and about 50 cheezeburgers away from Zach Galifianakis

CASILLA
Man, when this guy is throwing strikes he is a big time weapon out of the pen…..and Santiago just notched his 7th win of the season…..which is 1 less than Zito……and since July 1st… he is actually LEADING the Giants in W's with 6 Wins compared to Cain and Bumgarner with 5………

JOKER

SANCHEZ

Man……hard to get too pissed off when a starter goes 5 scoreless…..and yes, I have to acknowledge he had nasty stuff and was able to bear down to get out of trouble……but good god, is this kid always going to be a head case…….since his infamous guarantee, Sanchez has been pitching fairly well with 3 great efforts out of 4 starts……but tonight was a joke…… asking Sanchez to find a consistent release point was like asking Burrell to have a bad hair day…..just not gonna happen….and what the hell is up with scrubbing the SD logo off the back of the mound…..great, another reason for the Padres to be motivated to beat your ass…..not a good move, anyway you look at it……certainly the Pads took notice, and who knows is they take offense…..but that’s a good way to get one in the earhole……and it certainly didn't do anything to help your game…..hey here's a thought…..concentrate on YOUR OWN GAME….and when you get that shit squared away you can bust out some trash talk and pull some TO celebrating on the 50 yard line in Dallas kind of shit all you want……

SMACK OF THE STICK :
TEJADA
Was Uribe's bitch on grounders to 3rd most of the night, especially on that Baltimore Chop Stumble…….and playing the ball deep in the hole and wide throw opened up 3rd for Huff and the Giants win…..

SANCHEZ
Yes, 2 hits……but with the Giants needing a bunt to set up an insurance run in a tense game…..well…….2 fouls and a swing and a miss and it was done……

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(The fine print: There will be cussing and bad taste. This is written with the heat of the moment feel you may have during the game, with rational thought sprinkled in now and then. This is entertainment folks, sure there is a lot of truth and I am a genius, but this is all about having a laugh and enjoying the ride…….now lets go heckle Jeff Kent when he gets inducted to Cooperstown..)

by merkin

GAMEBALL and JOKER ==> GIANTS at PADS 09/09

2010-09-10T00:10:00.000-07:00

Now THAT is what I am talking about….the Giants broke out the whooping stick to club 4 homers in a game in San Diego for the first time since 09/09/03 at Qualcomm….Yes that is exactly 7 years ago…..Kevin Correia was the winning pitcher for the Giants, and Bochy was the Manager in San Diego….and that was also the last time the Giants made the playoffs……the Giants actually had 5 Homers that night. Aurillia, Alfonzo, Snow, Grissom and Torrealba……Bonds? 2 singles and 3 walks……

GAMEBALL and JOKER ==> GIANTS at PADS 09/09

GAMEBALL

HUFF

BIG fucking game from Huff….already showing signs of life in the Desert….Huff got his 2nd homer in 3 days in the third inning to give the Giants offense a shot in the arm……man love that swing with the little flick of the wrists to hook that ball over the wall….and then the flick of the bat to start that trot……Glad the whole women's undies thing is working for you…..but honestly, some things you really shouldn't be sharing……you are now skirting that line between funny and a little disturbing……lets go ahead and draw that line right there……I don't want to be picking up a paper and reading an article about your lucky nipple rings or how you shaved Pat Burrell uniform number into your pubes…..and be careful with adventurous undergarments…..you are playing in San Francisco and it’s a slippery slope that leads from Huff Daddy to Leather Daddy……hey, anything to work in an Arrested Development clip…….

TIP OF THE CAP :
CAIN
Bet you Cain don't need no thong…….he just stands tall and backs up his stellar 2009 with a similar 2010…Walks falling, K's steady, WHIP Down…..and that BABIP is around .270 for a second year in a row…..looking more like ability that statistical artifact to me,…suck that Voros McCraken…..

SANCHEZ
3 hits…..sure not all the hard hit variety, but got the first run of the night home in the first and then singled and scored on Huff's Ding in the 3rd……

POSEY
I keep hearing the Giants announcers talking about Burrell's shot…..and yes, it was pretty bad ass……but that Posey shot was a fucking BOMB……a BIG HIGH ARCHING Tater into the San Diego Night…..any questions about his power???.....hell, my only question is when his first 30+ HR year will be……

BURRELL
Pile on runs always welcome versus the Padres…..
URIBE
Just to the right of straight away center…..right into the Padres' young'uns

JOKER

PADRES

Well that didn't work……and that was as big a game for the Giants as it was for the Padres…..Confidence shifts to the Giants side as they come up with their first win versus the Padres by more than 1 run……and the Padres, fresh off a losing streak snapping sweep of the Dodgers, now are back on their heels with the panic button firmly in the down position….LeBlanc and Correia out of the rotation, Stauffer and Luebke in their sted……couple fresh rookies shuffled into the rotation in September in a pennant race doesn't exactly send the troops a message of confidence……and surely the amount of orange and black in the stands doesn't help things…..and after drawing 20,000 a game for the Dodger series……how many of the 26,000 tonight were Giants fans….5,000? 10,000??.....bet it felt like 26,000 to both the Padres team and fans……

SMACK OF THE STICK :
REDS
Wow, inventive way to lose…..on a straight steal of home by a rookie off a righthander in the stretch…..DUDE….STEP OFF AND LOB THE DAMN THING HOME……HELL, DON'T STEP OFF AND LOB THE DAMN THING…..EITHER WAY HE IS OUT……good god……

PABLO
I thought he busted out of it……well……looks like he is deep in it again….bouncing into a pair of DP's on balls that were no where near the strike zone……

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(The fine print: There will be cussing and bad taste. This is written with the heat of the moment feel you may have during the game, with rational thought sprinkled in now and then. This is entertainment folks, sure there is a lot of truth and I am a genius, but this is all about having a laugh and enjoying the ride…….now lets go heckle Jeff Kent when he gets inducted to Cooperstown..)

by merkin

GAMEBALL and JOKER ==> GIANTS at DBACKS 09-07

2010-09-08T00:22:00.000-07:00

GAMEBALL and JOKER ==> GIANTS at DBACKS 09-07

GAMEBALL

TIMMY

Now that felt good…..Timmy got an early lead and was throwing strikes keeping hitters off balance with the Fastball Curve and Change and pounding the strikezone…..and there was something I hadn't noticed before. Looks like he may have added a 4th pitch to the mix….. PitchF/X is calling it his slider…. I don't think its really a slider, because it has similar velocity to his change….but does have slider movement down and in to righties,….pitchfx picked up 12 such pitches, of which 10 were strikes and 7 were swinging strikes……maybe its nothing unusual, but I will dig more when I have time……and I bet $20 that Monkey will say it’s a slurve…....but whatever it is….Tim looked solid through 6 but ran out of steam pretty quick in the 7th…..and sure he has found some success with diminished velocity, so this graph is more indicative of fatigue than loss of fastball……and good work Tim, whatever you are doing keep it up my man……

TIP OF THE CAP :
HUFF
2 run shot in the first was a welcome early lead and welcome thunder from a bat that needs to get back on track……

TORRES
The glove scraping double in the first……and went 5 AB's without a K..may not seem like much…..but that breaks his 6 game K streak where he has racked up 14 K's in 25 AB's

BURRELL
Man this guy can hit the ball a long way

GUILLEN
For stinging the ball multiple times….get that playing time in now…..I pray you are sitting on the bench in a couple days instead of trying to cover Right Field in San Diego……

VELEZ
For being alive

JOKER

PADRES

I didn't dare make them the joker during that streak…I wasn't going to be that jinx that helped them out,…..but man, just when the last of the Padres doubters admitted they were wrong…..they were right….and the Padres hit a skid for the ages….losing 5 games in the standings in 8 days……and ask yourself a question…..would you rather be in our shoes or theirs…..yes, they have a 2 game lead in the loss column…..yes, they still have their Anti Giants Mojo mostly intact…..but this is a team that must be struggling with confidence and with the Giants on their heels the pressure is on for the first time all year……and good god, did you see that game??/ there was NOBODY in the stands…..a 1st place Padres team in a beautiful ballpark on a warm September night versus rival Los Angeles Dodgers drew 20,000 ppl…..thats less than 50% capacity…..and the stands there are huge and spread out…..so it looks a lot bigger than the 44000 or so it holds….when you have a reported crowd of 20,000 which is more like a crowd of less than 15,000….the place looked like Oakland Coliseum…..but don't fret too much about attendance Pads faithful…..surely the stadium will fill up this weekend…….as Giants fans invade and make it ATT South…….

SMACK OF THE STICK :
BRAVES
A new entry into the Wildcard lottery….the Braves finally lost their grip on 1st place in the east and are now in danger of losing that wild card lead as well……and those last 3 games of the season when the Giants play the Padres could loom large for the Braves……if the race stays this close, it’s a godsend for the Bravos…..if they more than a couple games back, it could be a curse……..

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GB and JK ARCHIVES AT THE GIANTS BOARD BLOG

(The fine print: There will be cussing and bad taste. This is written with the heat of the moment feel you may have during the game, with rational thought sprinkled in now and then. This is entertainment folks, sure there is a lot of truth and I am a genius, but this is all about having a laugh and enjoying the ride…….now lets go heckle Jeff Kent when he gets inducted to Cooperstown..)

by merkin

GAMEBALL and JOKER ==> GIANTS at DBACKS 09-06

2010-09-07T00:07:00.000-07:00

GAMEBALL and JOKER ==> GIANTS at DBACKS 09-06

GAMEBALL

BUM

Bum picked a good night to be lights out….going 7 scoreless for the 2nd time in his career……yes, the teams in the race are coming up with inventive ways to get rest to their rookie arms….. the Reds put Leake in the pen and now on the DL…….the Pads had Latos miss time with a mysterious injury and now pushed back a day with the "Flu"…..but Bumgarner keeps right on pumping past his 2009 inning number of 141 up to 168 and counting……and with about 6 starts left he is likely to push 200 innings in the Majors and Minors…..and tell you what, I say go for it…. they have kept his pitch count at or below 100 for 8 straight starts….and he is far from a max effort guy and who knows when we will get this close again…..and flags fly forever……..

TIP OF THE CAP :
NATE
Came up with the big hit in the 11th to put the Dbacks out of misery…….

PEN
Lopez and Ramirez bailed Bumgarner out of a 1 out and a runner at 3rd situation. Affeldt and Casilla made quick work of their innings, and Wilson appeared in his 17th consecutive game for the save….

HUFF/ RENT
2 hits is a big game these days……

POSEY
The one his that fell in the 11th, and the one that was robbed in the 9th….

TORRES
Couple big time plays and a couple he made look easy……

JOKER

DODGERS

The big news in the NL West tonight was the Padres stuffing a pathetic Dodgers team into the wound and stopping the bleeding at 10 games…. with Latos pushed back a day due to the "flu," the Dodgers couldn't capitalize on emergency starter Stauffer and a band of 6 relievers…and Padilla was yanked early after giving up 3 early runs……and in an interesting coincidence Latos will now be facing Tim Lincecum next Sunday in San Diego……

SMACK OF THE STICK :
BATS
Sure Kennedy has been shutting down the league in general, but the Giants bats have been asleep for a week and managing just enough runs to support a pitching staff that has been pitching their balls off……guess it would be too much to ask that we hit and pitch at the same time……but hell, 1 game back in September is a good place to be and there is still time to get hot…..in fact, lets get hot in about a week and then keep it rolling right into the playoffs…….ok, that CERTAINLY was too much to ask……..

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(The fine print: There will be cussing and bad taste. This is written with the heat of the moment feel you may have during the game, with rational thought sprinkled in now and then. This is entertainment folks, sure there is a lot of truth and I am a genius, but this is all about having a laugh and enjoying the ride…….now lets go heckle Jeff Kent when he gets inducted to Cooperstown..)

by merkin

GAMEBALL and JOKER ==> GIANTS at DODGERS 09/05

2010-09-06T00:33:00.000-07:00

Unfucking believable….. after a torrid July, the Giants stumbled in August…..after allowing 3.70 runs per game before August, the Giants allowed 4.93 runs per game in August……The Giants scored enough runs to tred water, but they slowly watched the Padres pull away going from a 1.5 game lead on 08/01, to a 6 game lead on 08/28……yes…the Sunday morning a week ago, the Giants were 6 games back….. …….since then, the division has turned on its head…..the Giants narrowly avoided a sweep against the DBacks…add a 2-1 each versus the Rockies and Dodgers……good for a 5-2 mark since last Sunday……well, since then the Pads have gone 0-7….their starting pitches have averaged less than 4 innings, LeBlanc lost his rotation spot, and Garland has publicly called out his own team…….yes, all the little things the Padres were doing, all the bounces the Padres were getting……well, the fun has ended and the Padres are desperate…..the same thing could have happened to us in August when Timmy and Zito went south……but Sanchez and Cain kept us out of losing streaks…..and the Bullpen Quartet of Wilson Casilla Ramirez and Lopez have each put up Double Digit innings with ERA's below 2…and combined for 61 innings of 1.18 ERA…..

GAMEBALL and JOKER ==> GIANTS at DODGERS 09/05

GAMEBALL

SANCHEZ

Jonathan put together back to back stellar outings in the limelight of national TV……Jon had 19 of 25 first pitch strikes including the first 8 batters of the night…..Jon also did not allow a leadoff hitter to reach base and only issued one walk……despite the numbers, Jon's lack of control was on display at times, but the glances were brief and he was able to right the ship quickly……man, this kid has an arm that 97% of major league pitchers dream of….and despite the frustrations that comes with his inconsitencies…..he has been ON enough to notch his 10th win and post a 3.39 ERA which puts him second behind Cain in starter ERA…..

TIP OF THE CAP :
URIBE
"We're going to see Uribe in our sleep" -Joe Torre
Man, what the hell…..I was talking to my Buddy from Seattle over the weekend, and he commented on how lucky I was to be a Giants fan…..and he pointed at Uribe……how do you guys win with a Guy like Uribe at Shortstop……his answer, the team plays hard every night every inning…..and we have guys on the bench accepting of their roles and everyone is pulling in the same direction…….sure talent is always needed, but his impression is the Giants are a class organization and that everyone on the team plays hard whether they are 20 games back or 20 games up…….Yes cheering for the Mariners can skew your perspective on things, but he has a point…….besides a few Molina comments here, and a Benitez quote there, I can't remember a Giants team laying down even when things were getting ugly……..

SANDOVAL
Couple knocks, including one of those broken bat bloops that reminds me of the 2009 Pablo where he would get 3 hits and you just scratched your head…..

BULLPEN
2 innings……4 K's…….and no baserunners

JOKER

DODGERS

Man, the Los Angeles Times is perhaps one of the greatest reads for a Giants fan these days……despite a solid core of young Major Leaguers, the McCourt divorce has thrown the team into disarray……and it keeps getting better and better…….did you read this piece where the Dodgers now owe over $400 Million sure it may be posturing to hide assets going into court, be certainly if McCourt is looking for $25 million from anyone with a pulse, things can't be too good……and the divorce proceedings are worth watching……if McCourt's prenuptial agreement is found valid and Frank is allowed to keep the team, it will certainly be continued austerity for the Dodgers….if, however the Dodgers are community property, they will be forced to sell to an owner that almost certainly would be in a better situation……

SMACK OF THE STICK :
PADS
Pictures are worth a bunch of words…..

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(The fine print: There will be cussing and bad taste. This is written with the heat of the moment feel you may have during the game, with rational thought sprinkled in now and then. This is entertainment folks, sure there is a lot of truth and I am a genius, but this is all about having a laugh and enjoying the ride…….now lets go heckle Jeff Kent when he gets inducted to Cooperstown..)

by merkin

GAMEBALL and JOKER ==> ROCKIES at GIANTS 09/01

2010-09-01T23:50:00.001-07:00

The Giants got one back…… 2 days after a broken bat and a bad bounce cost them a win….. a seeing eye grounder up the middle, a curveball in the dirt, and a wild throw got the Giants enough offense to take the rubber match behind a rejuvenated Lincecum add that to a Padres swoon…..suddenly the Giants hit the road full of optimism……

GAMEBALL and JOKER ==> ROCKIES at GIANTS 09/01

GAMEBALL

TIMMY!

TIMMY IS BACK!!!...ok, well not the 2008-09 Cy Young version topping out at 95-97 MPH……his velocity remains down, as he topped out at 92.8 MPH and averaged just south of 91 MPH…..but the CONTROL was there, with Timmy pounding the strike zone with a tailing fastball, and his plus plus Curve and Change…..the Rockies were on their heels and Timmy was able to out duel Jimenez……so maybe his velocity comes back, maybe it doesn't….either way Timmy will need to learn to pitch with diminished velocity…….and tonight showed me that he CAN adjust……"Hitting is timing. Pitching is upsetting timing" -Warren Spahn …….and with control, that offspeed stuff Timmy can keep the opponents off balance without a 95 MPH heater….and oh yeah, got a big 2 strike bunt down to set up the winning run……

TIP OF THE CAP :
FORD
Now that’s a debut!......Darren, the token prospect received for Ray Durham…..revived his career with a solid showing in San Jose and then in Spring……Assigned to AA Richmond, looked like Darren was finally on the track to the show……and then the arrest……falsifying police report that he was robbed of his employers $300…..things looked Villalona-like for Darren…….but tonight, he made a unexpected splash in the show……flying around the bases to give the Giants the go ahead run…….and he earned about $2200 and a per diem too….

FARTNOTE
Came up with the big hit of the game, with a hard hit 6 hopper out of the reach of EY Jr…..and good thing it was a 6 hopper as a ground ball single that died in the outfield actually gave Guillen enough time to trudge around 3rd and score…….Farty also drew the 3-2 walk off Jimenez in the 9th that turned into the winning run…..

GUILLEN
Started the Rally that tied the game in the 5th with a hard hit single….and good god……I swear this guy runs like Bengie on the bases….only less jiggly……

WILSON
Love him, hate him……but the fact of the matter is, he is one of the top closers in the game……

SANCHEZ
2 hits and a game ending catch that I have never seen before……I don't know what he was doing…..Kuip says it was too low to catch over the shoulder……but to me it looked like he overran a little and/ or didn't want to spin and risk losing track of the ball……in the end…….he saw ball and made sure it went into mitt……and that’s always a good play

JOKER

BOCHY

Managers lose more games than they win……and I usually try not to second guess moves unless, they are obvious…….but Bochy tried to squander all the Giants scoring chances……first of all, with runners on 1st and 3rd and Timmy at the plate in the 5th….the key is preserving the opportunity……you can A) let him take all the way…..B) run a safety squeeze/ sacrifice…..instead Timmy is first pitch swinging???? Ubaldo walked Posey on 5 pitches a few batter earlier…..just gone 3-1 to Fontenot and allowed his first run of the game…could it be possible that he might not have his best control and might have a lapse of concentration??? good god, at least let him work a pitch or two…….And then starts the runner with 1 out and a full count to Pablo……not smart, as Pablo has 5 swings in on Jimenez and 3 of those were swings and misses…..the others were a weak pop and a foul……and when you start a runner on 3-2, you are not only relying on the contact ability of the batter, but also his strike zone judgments.,…yes, PABLO'S Strike Zone Judgement……that’s as much of an Oxymoron as Bochy's Managing Ability…..

SMACK OF THE STICK :
PABLO
Sure Jimenez is about as nasty as they come, but we had a secret weapon….Pablo owned a career 10 for 28 with a .986n OPS off Ubaldo…..so when big spots for Pablo came up, you might think Pablo would be the one to come through….but Pablo came up with runners on 3 times, and went down 3 times…..in the 2nd on a popup, in the 5th striking out on 3 straight fastballs, and in the 7th swinging at ball 4 into a strike em out throw em out double play…..

TORRES
Had his own share of troubles….he was completely owned by Ubaldo……going 0 for 4 with 3 K's….and this has been par for the course against Ubaldo, as Andres is now 1 for 14 with 7 K's and 1 walk…..

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(The fine print: There will be cussing and bad taste. This is written with the heat of the moment feel you may have during the game, with rational thought sprinkled in now and then. This is entertainment folks, sure there is a lot of truth and I am a genius, but this is all about having a laugh and enjoying the ride…….now lets go heckle Jeff Kent when he gets inducted to Cooperstown..)

by merkin

http://i51.photobucket.com/albums/f400/jackj0000/board/smileys/jack_bochy-1.jpg

GAMEBALL and JOKER ==> ROCKIES at GIANTS 08/31

2010-09-01T00:52:00.001-07:00

And you thought the Giants were going to let you off easy….. End of August, and they fold up shop on the season letting you deflate your hopes for the season and focus on more fruitful endeavors….. but that’s not Giants baseball…..nope, they will find a way to torment your soul until the final days of the season…..holding out hope that somehow someway this is going to be their year…..and the screwed up thing is, as painful as last night was…..they are still in this…..and with the Padres sudden swoon, the Giants are not just chasing the Phillies….but also the Padres for the division……the Giants are only 4 games back of the Padres and they still have 7 games to play against the Padres…..that only leaves us virtually 11 games back……

GAMEBALL and JOKER ==> ROCKIES at GIANTS 08/31

GAMEBALL

BUMGARNER

Brad Who? Think back to early in the year when Penny was dealing, Bumgarner couldn't break a plane of glass and Wellemeyer was getting torched…..well maybe Sabean knew what he had but maybe he didn't……but looking back seems almost silly to think about……and with all the fuss about the Super 2 status on Posey……that late year call up of Bumgarner almost assures him of avoiding that extra arbitration year……
Bumgarner bounced back tonight weaving in and out of trouble and pitching in a double smoked to Right Center for the go ahead RBI……yeah, this kid is a keeper……and yeah, Sabean probably didn't want to cough up more money for pitching, especially with Penny's injury history…..and yeah Bumgarner was talented……but he didn't know that Madison would be good so quick…….he got lucky…….

TIP OF THE CAP :
TORRES
Could have given the gameball here as well, with the Giants losing the late lead things could have turned for the worse VERY quickly…….but Andres answered RIGHT BACK with a sky shot over the wall in left…..and he is outhomering his house mate the Panda 14-10….and yes, still has a higher SLG than Howard .502 - .499

POSEY
And yes, perhaps the popular choice for the gameball……GUNNED down Gonzales in the 6th……and they gave the Giants the sorely needed 9th inning cushion with a 2 run double off the bricks…..

SANCHEZ
Man he turned that around quick….just 2 weeks ago he was on the pine sporting a .261 average and Big Head was talking about Freddy trying to "find his swing"….well I don't know who's swing he found, but its been good for a 23-48 stretch which has his batting average up to .289 and made what was looking like his worst full season into an average one for Freddy…..which is a hollow batting average with little speed, power, or on base ability other than his BA……so keep that BA up Freddy…..and lets see if we can add a few more points while you are at it……

RAMIREZ
Made quick work of the 7th after Bumgarner's exit

WILSON
Made quick work of the 9th….

JOKER

CORREIA

The Padres extend their season long losing streak to 6….and their starting pitching suddenly looking mortal…Latos is still dealing…Richard remains solid……Garland is still giving short solid outings……but at the back end of that rotation, it is starting to come apart….LeBlanc has been roughed up not getting past the 4th inning in 3 of his last 4……and Correia has laid 3 stinkers in a row…..giving up 20 runs in his last 3 starts……and with Chris Young on a rehab, Correia is the likely candidate to get bumped…….hey, I didn't say the Padres were falling apart, but that NL best staff is suddenly not so strong…….of course it means nothing if the Giants can't capitalize….

SMACK OF THE STICK :
PABLO/ URIBE
With the Giants up by a run in the 7th…..runners on 1st and 3rd……failed to get a single run home on back to back K's

MORA
I believe my exact words were…..MELVIN FUCKING MORA…..good god, is this guy still in the league?? it isn't just the marginal Haristons and Ecksteins……but the goddamn washed up vets like Garret Anderson, Giambi and now Mora???....fuck, and if I remember correctly he had a game winner against us early this year…….man, apparently its easy to hit Giants pitching……just make sure you SUCK versus everyone else and play in the NL West….

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(The fine print: There will be cussing and bad taste. This is written with the heat of the moment feel you may have during the game, with rational thought sprinkled in now and then. This is entertainment folks, sure there is a lot of truth and I am a genius, but this is all about having a laugh and enjoying the ride…….now lets go heckle Jeff Kent when he gets inducted to Cooperstown..)

by merkin

GAMEBALL and JOKER ==> ROCKIES at GIANTS 08/30

2010-08-30T23:52:00.001-07:00

Back again, this time it was Work, Illness, and going to Ballgames……I got to figure out this whole independently wealthy thing soon….hell I would settle for dependently wealthy if you know any rich cougars looking for some Merkin Love……but enough about me……

Was a perfect night for the Giants to make a move…..unfortunately the only movement they would have involved the 9th inning and their bowels……yes with all the playoff rivals losing, and Jonathan twirling a good ol' 1-0 gem, the Giants found a way to squander 9th inning lead at home…..the 2nd such loss on the homestand the first being last week's comeback from 10-1…and these exceptional last innings losses have just been the start of the inventive ways the Giants have lost this year…..I swear I must have thought at least 4 different times that we had just suffered our worst loss of the season……I swear I am still pissed off about Cuzzi's bonecrusher…..these are losses that PENNANT winners WIN NOT LOSE……..

GAMEBALL and JOKER ==> ROCKIES at GIANTS 08/30

GAMEBALL

SANCHEZ

Good god…..that game was the reason we keep him and the reason we want to trade him all rolled into one……masterful with nasty stuff all night…..but in the end, when the pressure is on he unraveled……after getting a quick 0-2 on Fowler……4 straight balls, of which the first 3 weren't even close…..and they way Sanchez wasn't throwing strikes and the way he doesn't hold runners, he forced his way out of the game……

TIP OF THE CAP :
HUFF
Couple walks a run scored…..and a deep drive to left in the 9th that might been out of here during the heatwave last week

POSEY
Had some ugly swings at offspeed pitches……but was able to come up with the only RBI of the night…..

JOKER

ROSS

I am just at a loss for words…..I want to defend and make excuses for Ross…..but I can't, that is simply a ball you must catch…..yes, it was hard hit…..yes, it was a broken bat ball that sailed……but you simply must catch that ball……yes, my first thought was it was falling in front of him, but I am watching on TV……and he is the professional….and the ball was ENTIRELY catchable…….add to that a MISERABLE night at the plate with 2 strikeouts and the only ball in play a Double Play that killed the only Giants rally of the night…….and our newcomer is the joker……..but I still rather see him play RF over the Sloth that is Guillen…….

SMACK OF THE STICK :
F SNACHEZ
Couple errors to bring his season total to 4…….and the game blowing error in the 9th with a 47 hopper that rolled it's way into Gonzales and out of play……he makes that throw on a line and they got him by 5 feet…….

WILSON
He got over in time, but was WAY too close to back up that play……you got to be further away from third than that, BECAUSE of the unexpected bounces……all you have to do is knock it down……you knock it down, Car Go ain't going anywhere, and we can go ahead and lose in 14th instead……

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(The fine print: There will be cussing and bad taste. This is written with the heat of the moment feel you may have during the game, with rational thought sprinkled in now and then. This is entertainment folks, sure there is a lot of truth and I am a genius, but this is all about having a laugh and enjoying the ride…….now lets go heckle Jeff Kent when he gets inducted to Cooperstown..)

by merkin

GAMEBALL and JOKER ==> REDS at GIANTS 08/24

2010-08-25T00:22:00.001-07:00

What the hell is all this about….double digit runs in back to back games…… the Giants left St Louis with the offense tucked between their legs…..now back to the shores of the bay somehow they are transformed into the goddamn New York Yankees…..this was the first back to back double digit games since May 2006 in Houston and…… according to my searching at Baseball Reference the first time ever Double Digit runs scored in back to back games at ATT/ SBC/ Pac Bell Parks and last time the Giants did it at home it was 1973…….man, that’s hard to believe……and although we know this team is not the New York Yankees, lets hope they can stay hot through September……that is as long as Pat Burrell doesn't start dating Kate Hudson……

GAMEBALL and JOKER ==> REDS at GIANTS 08/24

GAMEBALL

PABLO

Could go 15 different ways with this pick, but I will send some love the Panda's way….struggling from the Right side for most of the season smoked a 2 run single over the leaping shortstop to plate 2 in the first…..then after a hard hit out to the gap in left, he turned around to the left side and crushed an RBI Double and then scored on a Juan Uribe Homer to turn back a surging Reds team…..but he wasn't done…..in laugher time, Pablo his a BOMB OVER triples alley…..he rounded up the night with a whiff, but again more evidence that the Panda is back……sure, I have said it before……but I really want to believe it……Torres, Huff, Posey, Panda…….with a little Sanchez Ross Burrell and Uribe……suddenly, a lineup 8 hitters deep that can do some damage…..

TIP OF THE CAP :
SANCHEZ
Back to back 4 hit nights….first time in a career that includes……wait for it……a batting title and 3 all star appearances…..and what the hell is with the Homer??? man it musta been a hot night….but come on, that road trip through St Louis and Philly was hotter…..maybe ATT park is a bandbox after all…..just needs a little global warming….

URIBE
With the Reds knocking Sanchez out of the game and cutting that Giants lead down to two……Uribe followed Pablos double in the 5th with a soaring shot into the left field bleachers to give the Giants a 10 spot for the night

POSEY
Three run shot really sealed the deal…..and got Posey on the board…..

NATE
Got something in there somewhere…..its all a blur…..

BURRELL
Had no hits, but that 1st inning walk was instrumental in getting on the board early…..

ROSS
I like this kid……DL Guillen until healthy…..play Ross in right…with that range and a little pop…..Nate and Huff/ Ishikawa can spell him now and then……and he looked good tonight with a big 2 out RBI single to get first blood in the opening frame,….and then lead off the decisive 5th inning with a chop hit to 3rd…..

BULLPEN
Wasn't pretty at times, but allowed no runs to the Reds in 4 2/3rd innings of work……

ARAS
Our visitor from Korea is 2-0 and when he is here we average like 27 runs a game…..

JOKER

HOWARD

The Wild Card Leading Phillies….got Howard back and ready to pull away….well….ok, not just yet……..Oh Man……that's a tough night……0 for 7 with 5 k's…….and best of all got ejected in the 14th on back to back check swings called strikes by a Minor League Umpire…..in all fairness…..from the replays I have seen, pretty sure he got jobbed there…..and yeah, I probably woulda wanted to kick that Fucking Vacation Replacement umpire all the way back to Indianapolis……but still, with the Phillies out of position players, the move put the Phillies in a bad spot…..and then came up with an L in 16 innings at home versus the lowly Astros…….and tied with the Giants for the Wild Card Lead…..

SMACK OF THE STICK :
SANCHEZ
with 7 runs of support, got knocked out before he could qualify for the win…..

BAKER
Gotta tip your cap to Dusty for competing with this Reds team no one expected to contend……and doing it with pitching……and even more astounding, he has actually backed off his starters a little….2010 he has 21 games with pitch counts over 110…..36 in 2009….44 in 2008…..

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(The fine print: There will be cussing and bad taste. This is written with the heat of the moment feel you may have during the game, with rational thought sprinkled in now and then. This is entertainment folks, sure there is a lot of truth and I am a genius, but this is all about having a laugh and enjoying the ride…….now lets go heckle Jeff Kent when he gets inducted to Cooperstown..)

by merkin

GAMEBALL and JOKER ==> REDS at GIANTS 08/23

2010-08-24T00:01:00.000-07:00

Back from the dead…..much like the Giants on this last road trip, I was beaten up and tired over the last week…..I won't go into details, but my day job requires that I be a very (self) important man with lots of important responsibilities….but being a super genius, this comes with the territory ….. so enough whining and back to work……at least back to my real job, and that’s entertaining you shlubs…..

GAMEBALL and JOKER ==> REDS at GIANTS 08/23

GAMEBALL

SANCHIE

Today's 4 hit game was a nice reprive for our resident "Former All Star Former Batting Champ" ™ who is in the midst of his worst year of his career….coming of surgery he has posted a career low .261 batting average with a career low OPS of .642…..but tonight he was able to lace a big 2 run double down the left field line, collect a pair of singles only to get gunned down on a pair of failed sacrifices…..

TIP OF THE CAP :
HUFF
I think we can say for certain that mini-slump is done, with tonight's effort that is 2 homers 7 hits 4 walks and 5 RBI in the last 4 games…..Huff got the Giants on the board in the 1st, and then helped add on with a BOMB to the part of the Arcade reserved for the Big Boys….tough choice to miss the gameball, but had to give it to Sanchie with the 4 hits…..maybe if Huff makes one of the two missed great plays it would swing it back to Huff…..but something tells me that Huff still has a few more Gameballs coming this year

TORRES
A pair of walks in the 1st inning, and a two run tater in the bottom of the 3rd inning to answer the Reds 2 spot in the top half and to send this into laugher territory…….

SANDOVAL
The two leading men of 2009 have had a hard time following up their performances….and while Timmy's struggles seem to mount…..Pablo looks like he is starting to break through…..yeah, we have said it before, but I really mean it this time…..

CAIN
After a little hiccup in the 3rd, bared down and retired 57 in a row or something……and after 2 failed bunts, was able to get that 3rd one down……avoiding the Pink Sambero…..which is 3 failed sacrifice bunts…..and yes, I just invented that……

LOPEZ
Just for the 0-2 pitch on Votto that looked made him look like Jean Van De Velde hacking at the grass in 1999

SABEAN
For a team that still has its best days ahead of it, didn't break up the core in the majors or minors, and even kept basically every prospect of value……while adding spare parts in Burrell, Ross, Guillen, Lopez, Fontenot and Ramirez……

JOKER

ROWAND

Well, despite a decent performance in a reserve role, you have gone from a nice spare part to a complete waste of a roster spot….Ross is a better hitter, can play all 3 outfield positions, and is right handed…….basically making Rowand completely obsolete…….he's not even the spare tire in the trunk…..more like the shredded tire with steel belts exposed that is too beaten up to even be used as a tire swing……nope all this tire is good for, is costing you that damn recycling fee at the local dump……

SMACK OF THE STICK :
ROSS
Well, good news is he has a job……bad news…..lost a mostly full time gig, and was traded for nothing…….and I can't help but think back to your days as a Dodger……and your last play as a Dodger….When Omar turned a kick ass DP….and you were traded for PTBNL within a week……

MOTA
Got the Grissom Treatment…..DL'ed for a phantom injury…..and this time that injury was something called TI Syndrome…..apparently it means you are Butt Hurt…..sounds like the same injury Molina had when he didn't get a fat contract this offseason……

0-FER-RIBE
Well, someone had to take the collar…..and that was Juan, left out of the party and taking a big O fer

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(The fine print: There will be cussing and bad taste. This is written with the heat of the moment feel you may have during the game, with rational thought sprinkled in now and then. This is entertainment folks, sure there is a lot of truth and I am a genius, but this is all about having a laugh and enjoying the ride…….now lets go heckle Jeff Kent when he gets inducted to Cooperstown..)

by merkin

GAMEBALL and JOKER ==> GIANTS at PHILS 08/17

2010-08-18T00:10:00.001-07:00

After a disappointing series versus the Padres, the Giants get a 6 Game Roadie into fellow Wild Card hopefuls St Louis and Philly……Hoping for 4-2, could live with 3-3, but really just hoping we can avoid a sweep in either city…..

GAMEBALL and JOKER ==> GIANTS at PHILS 08/17

GAMEBALL

GUILLEN

Well, that bat looked pretty nice tonight, with line drive out to Right, a smash single to lef, and a BOMB that answered the Phillies 2 run 6th and pulled the Giants to within a run…… what a random collection the Giants have put together on offense……The Phenom behind the plate, a struggling Panda at 3rd…….and a bunch of vets on the wrong side of 30 that resembles the the Island of Misfit Toys more than a playoff lineup…and with what we saw tonight, looks like Jose's bat will be a perfect fit with the Giants despite the square wheels on his caboose…..

TIP OF THE CAP :
BURRELL
Got off to a quick start with a solo shot in the first to give the Giants a 2 run margin

POSEY
2 hits including a single that setup the Giants first run

CASILLA
With Runzler and Affeldt on the mend, Casilla is making a strong case for keeping a roster spot….and tonight he kept the Giants in the game getting out of the 6th with a runner on 2nd and no one out…..don't look now but that’s his 10th appearance in a row without giving up a run…..15 innings, 5 hits, 4 walks, 10 k's…….

BOBBY THOMPSON
What can you say, the biggest most famous Home Run in baseball history……and it beat the Dodgers….

JOKER

RAY

Ouch…..so THAT'S the bad Ray…..Chris saw his ERA fatten up quicker that a Retired Tony Gwynn….going from from 3.28 to 4.05 in 1 appearance……and he was hit pretty hard…..a couple hard hit balls through the right side. a walk with Victorino dancing of 1st, and then a Double by Ruiz that hit a wall harder than Tom Cruise's career

SMACK OF THE STICK :
RAMIREZ
Dind't do Ray any favors allowing all of Ray's inherited runners to score……and soon, Ramon might have a chance to show one his most valuable attributes…….he has options available (Marco, feel free to double check me, I am doing rules by memory)….and when Runzler and Affeldt return, the Giants are going to need this roster spot….

ZITO
Got an early lead, but wasn't able to hold it…..the big stat of the night is 0 K's……if Zito isn't missing bats, it's not going to be a good night…and he got 4 swings and misses in 91 pitches….4 swings and misses?

URIBE
4 swings and misses…that was an average At Bat for Uribe tonight

PABLO
2 boot in 2 games….

FART IN NOTE
0 for 3 with a boot

HUFF
And the Water Buffalo that stirs the drink……opened up about himself and Pat in the Merc…..and then proceeded to go 0 for 4 with 0 for 2 and a DP with runners in scoring position….

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(The fine print: There will be cussing and bad taste. This is written with the heat of the moment feel you may have during the game, with rational thought sprinkled in now and then. This is entertainment folks, sure there is a lot of truth and I am a genius, but this is all about having a laugh and enjoying the ride…….now lets go heckle Jeff Kent when he gets inducted to Cooperstown..)

by merkin

GAMEBALL and JOKER ==> PADS at GIANTS 08/15

2010-08-16T00:25:00.000-07:00

What the hell was THAT…..out team that is supposedly in the race, with new reinforcements, with the momentum from the night before……with our ace against the end of their rotation…..we get our asses handed to us….I mean we have gotten kinda used to losing to the Padres this year with our 2-8 record against South LA…but each of those ten games have been ones that could go either way and you weren't left with a feeling of defeat so much as frustration that the Padres stole another one…..in those 10 games the average margin of victory has been 1.5 runs and the largest margin of victory has been 3 runs…..so when you suddenly get down 8-2 and your ace is knocked out…..well, it makes for a drag of a game…and that’s a major understatement….

GAMEBALL and JOKER ==> PADS at GIANTS 08/15

GAMEBALL

POSEY

What can you say….the lone bright spot of the day….3 of the Giants 4 hits on the day including a 2 run shot that accounted for all the Giants runs…..what more can I say, this kid is gold……

TIP OF THE CAP :
URIBE
For the whiff on the Tip of the Cap yesterday for the walk off single

HUFF
No Hits, but had two defensive highlights on bases loaded home to first DP to keep the Giants in the game for a moment……and then on a diving snag of a Tony Gwynn smash that was ticketed for the Right Field Corner…..

JOKER

TIMMY

RED ALERT, WOOP WOOP WOOP, RED ALERT
OK You finally got me worried a little….. control still seems to be the big issue, and although he wasn't hit hard today….. I am finally able to admit that his velocity is a tick down……through injury, mechanics, or just wear and tear, who knows……but after breaking in averaging 91-95mph on the fastball……and then spending last year averaging 92-94mph…his velocity seemed in line with what I would expect….but over the last 6 starts, after the complete game shut out against the Mets…..his velocity has dipped back down and I think we have enough data points to call it a trend……see the velocity by game below with the green dot being the average and the grey bar the range……The start after the Shutout his fastball average dipped below 90mph for the first time in his career, and since then he hasn't been better than 92.5mph average…..these last 6 starts aren't the start of the pattern, but are the longest extended stretch of low 90's we have seen and really stand out as red flag, especially since there is a magical red box around those starts……
BTW, thx to Fangraphs for the graphic, but I had to update the last 3 starts myself….although not as clean as their graph……

SMACK OF THE STICK :
BATS sans POSEY
1 hit…..Wade Fucking LeBlanc?? Good god, this guy should be pitching in the PCL and you get 1 goddamn hit????

MOTA
Well, when Runzler and/ or Affeldt get healthy, there will be a roster crunch…..and I don't think you helped your chances today

PABLO
Airmailed a throw to score a run, add pitches to Timmy's count and help bury the Giants

GUILLEN
Down by 4 in the 4th, and the Giants got their only non-Buster hit…..a drive into the gap that had triple written all over it…..and about halfway to 2nd, Guillen found another gear…..the ground his clutch and stalled ….man, somewhere towards 2nd he slowed down big time……looked like me chugging out there……my bet is Guillen wasn't doing a whole lot of working out in the 10 days since he was DFA's…….

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(The fine print: There will be cussing and bad taste. This is written with the heat of the moment feel you may have during the game, with rational thought sprinkled in now and then. This is entertainment folks, sure there is a lot of truth and I am a genius, but this is all about having a laugh and enjoying the ride…….now lets go heckle Jeff Kent when he gets inducted to Cooperstown..)

by merkin

GAMEBALL and JOKER ==> PADS at GIANTS 08/14

2010-08-15T00:13:00.001-07:00

Great day at the yard, and there was something cathartic about today's win…… today was a day of frustration for the Padres, squandering the lead, hitting into a pair of double plays and going 2-18 with runners in scoring position….. but the Giants battled to the last out and the GIANTS were the team that did little things that win games and the PADRES were the team coughing up 90 FEET too many times……and tomorrow's game is very large…..not so much in the standings, but in the Psyche of the Giants……if they can bring home a series win against the Pads……well, that breeds confidence and well……don't make any plans for October that you can't change……so delay that trip to Hawaii to November….I got a feeling October could get interesting……

GAMEBALL and JOKER ==> PADS at GIANTS 08/14

GAMEBALL

POSEY

Posey was overmatched most of the day, with a soft single to left and a hotshot grounder being his best efforts at the plate……but he was the hero in the 11th, turning a comeback chopper up the middle into a leadoff double and scored the winning run…….I swear, this guy is fucking Midas, everything he touches turns to gold…….Jeter/Varitek hybrid? Well, That WAS his college coach talking…..but maybe he had something there…….

TIP OF THE CAP :
SANDOVAL
Just for the 1 At Bat……crushing a shoulder high 1-2 fastball over the wall in right and getting the Giants on the board and in the game…..

HUFF
Huff had the Hard Hit Out off Adams today…….and today he took his frustrations out on the other half of the untouchable Padres Setup men……Gregerson had held the Giants scoreless 47 consecutive innings (I think it was 47)……but apparently Huff didn't read the press notes, CRUSHING a slider off the wall in right sending Fontenot to 3rd and setting up the tie…..

BURRELL
0 hits…..and I think I actually considered a gameball…….after looking overmatched on the first few pitches from Gregerson, he took a high outside fastball to the right side for a game tying groundout……and take note of the 27 pitches seen in 5 AB's…..

BUMGARNER
Wasn't the sharpest, but got out of trouble all day holding the Padres to 2 runs over 7

BULLPEN
Large again with 4 scoreless and the win…..

FONTENOT
First inning double gave the Giants a early chance…..and the groundball single through the right side setup the win

JIM WOLF
In Film and Theater, when an actor turns and addresses the audience, it is called Breaking the Fourth Wall Well Jim pulled one on me today…..after we were all over the home plate umpire on a high pitch in the 1st……Jim was looking into the stands…..and always eager to engage the actors…..I said "Hey Jim"……of course he responded with a "Was that you giving my partner a hard time?"……I admitted guilt, but insisted the ball was high and that I would check my Tivo later…….he smiled, and I seemed to agree with my opinion and told me to "Tell my friends": By which I really don't know what he meant……as the game went on, we had a varied discourse covering the culinary arts, modern hairstyles, group psychology, waste management, and of course baseball…..he certainly likes to talk, likes to laugh, and I think was brilliant to engage the local loudmouth as to disarm any heckles I might have had in store for him…….

JOKER

LATOS

Yes, Latos……he pitched a great game, but he's the Joker for two important reasons….First, I don't like him, he's a fucking little bitch…..and second, he can't hurt us on Sunday, and I don't want the Joker Jinx to bite us in the rubber match on Sunday…….
The kid has tremendous stuff and a good idea of what to do with it…..and he was dominant again today……spotting his mid 90's fastball and throwing strikes with the slider and mixing in a change that made hitters look foolish…….but he's a little bitch out there….moaning and groaning about umpires calls and on National TV pouting about the pitch that Pablo put over the wall……shut yer yap you big fucking baby…..you got great stuff and shit happens, just pitch and forget the rest…….and stay the fuck away from my car……jackass…..

SMACK OF THE STICK :
ISHIKAWA
0 for 4 didn’t help his chances of retaining AB's with Guillen's arrival

MERKIN
OK, on TV it looked bad…..like a gross misjudgment of the ball as it hit off my forearm…..but first of all, the ball landed a good 10 feet from me and I DID NOT expect it to bounce my direction…….second, the ball was coming off a bounce from BEHIND me…..third, I was pretty much pinned in, without room to adjust and I thought the ball was coming down on my left shoulder......…..end result, it trickled away a couple feet and I picked it up off the ground……and yes, I gave it to the girl........and yes, it looks pretty fucking dumb on video…….

HEADLEY
Little bitch #2…….don't like em…….and his errant throw didn't result in runs…..but it sure pissed off Latos, and ran his pitch count up a little…..

J HAIRSTON
Got a little leather on Posey's ball in the 11th……and then didn't persue the ball as it trickled to the left fielder….. could he have chased that ball down? Maybe not, but it might have made Posey think twice…….instead Posey made a read on a ball just rolling into no mans land…….

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(The fine print: There will be cussing and bad taste. This is written with the heat of the moment feel you may have during the game, with rational thought sprinkled in now and then. This is entertainment folks, sure there is a lot of truth and I am a genius, but this is all about having a laugh and enjoying the ride…….now lets go heckle Jeff Kent when he gets inducted to Cooperstown..)

by merkin

GAMEBALL and JOKER ==> PADS at GIANTS 08/13

2010-08-14T00:28:00.001-07:00

I know that when you heard about the trade for Guillen and Cash for a Player to be named later, the first thing that popped into your head was……"What does Merkin think about this all"….well, I will keep you in suspense no longer…….I am in the HEY, OK….I can deal with it… sure he's played for 10 teams so far…..but that’s just 10 teams that wanted him…….and still just 34 years old, low risk move…..and as far as bad clubhouse guy…..well…..he's played for A LOT of shitty teams….and we heard the same thing about Huff and Burrell….well ok, maybe not AS MUCH bad stuff as we have heard about Guillen…..but I am willing to give him a chance……and really, it likely means AB's taken from the Right Handed Rowand more than anyone…..although he could impact Ishikawa some as well…….and the real wildcard is the PTBNL……if somehow we can just send Guillen back as the PTBNL and keep the Cash……well, THAT’S a GOOD TRADE……..

Now on with business….
"Baseball is a game of inches" -Branch Rickey…..well, tonight was more like a game of 90 feet….given up and lost…..the Padres weren't the most talented team, they weren't the best hitting or pitching team…..but they were the BETTER team by a longer margin than that 3-2 score would show you……

GAMEBALL and JOKER ==> PADS at GIANTS 08/13

GAMEBALL

BULLPEN

After a dismal Thursday blowing the lead for Cain, the unit bounced back with a solid outing….The Good Casilla showed up tonight with runners on 1st and 2nd and down by 1 and got his nasty stuff over for strikes and got out of that inherited mess….Santiago then came back for a clean inning, followed by Ramirez who kept it together for an innings and a 1/3 before walking Denorfia on 4 pitches……Lopez came in for the LOOGY our, and then Ray capped it off the 4 1/3 scoreless 1 hit 1 walk innings that really gave the Giants a chance to get back into the game…..that is, if they could put wood on the ball…….

TIP OF THE CAP :
HUFF
Pretty much the only player to get wood on the ball against the Padres Bullpen…..he hit that Ball so hard, it sounded like KRod having a conversation with his Girl Friend's father…….

TORRES
Started the night with a bang, taking the walk, and then 180 feet before a Huff RBI Double…..

JOKER

SANCHEZ

Jonathan couldn't put his money where his mouth was……although he did look focused and had good stuff out there, he gave up leadoff runners in the first 3 innings, ….but the JOKER is really not for how he pitched….it was the 90 FEET he failed to gain in the 2nd inning……with the first 2 runners on base and nobody out, a SIMPLE BUNTto the 3rd baseman would have advanced the two runners…..instead GODDAMN COMEBACKER to the pitcher for an out at 3rd…..the bunt was so bad that the throw from third almost doubled up Sanchez at first……that was the last real threat of the night, as the Giants wouldn't get a runner past first for the rest of the game……Way to back it up big mouth, we had a perfect chance to get back the lead and change momentum in the game, which is HUGE when a team is in your heads……

SMACK OF THE STICK :
ROWAND
I take back anything positive I said about Rowand yesterday……just fucking stupid today…….first on the Headley drive to Center, Rowand goes all Chevy Chase on the ball and gives up an easy Triple…..a 90 FEET mistake that turned into a run….and then trying to hard to make up for the misplay and Sanchez's sad bunt, the complete WHIFF on a steal of third……these are LARGE mistakes when playing a team like the Padres…..and how many of you thing that Torres woulda caught that Headley ball……

PABLO
For 1 single play……you THROW that ball, don't chase his ass all the way to the plate……you were given a gift, and you don't persue that far to the ADVANCING bag, if you get into a foot race, make it BACK to the preceeding bag……and PUT THE BALL IN YOUR THROWING HAND, don't carry it in the glove…..come on, you have been playing this game since you were a fucking embryo, you KNOW this shit…....that cost the Giants 90 FEET on the TRAIL RUNNER and ended up being the mistake that lead to the go ahead run……and christ, you were 2 inches from getting NOBODY out……

FP
Tried to tag that on Posey talking about getting his shoulders turned……yeah, wasn't going to happen, Posey chased him hard, had the ball ready to throw and chased him to within a couple feet of Sandoval…if anything, Posey chased too far……wait for him to turn his shoulders? good god, he coulda run him to the Left Field Foul Pole and that wasn't happening…….

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(The fine print: There will be cussing and bad taste. This is written with the heat of the moment feel you may have during the game, with rational thought sprinkled in now and then. This is entertainment folks, sure there is a lot of truth and I am a genius, but this is all about having a laugh and enjoying the ride…….now lets go heckle Jeff Kent in when he gets inducted to Cooperstown..)

by merkin

GAMEBALL and JOKER ==> CUBS at GIANTS 08/12

2010-08-13T00:21:00.001-07:00

Another long long day, tired as hell….but I am putting together a rally…..

GAMEBALL and JOKER ==> CUBS at GIANTS 08/12

GAMEBALL

PAT

Damn Pat, I used up all my material yesterday……but when you are the front side of a back to back and throw in a slam for good measure, hard not to give you that game ball even if that lead was given up by the pen……not only has this move worked out to near perfection, but the way Pat came to the Giants with little expectation and with Huff and Rowand on the roster, has allowed him to slip seamlessly into the Clubhouse and into Giants fans affections…..if he signed a lucrative Free Agent contract before the 2009 season, I think things might not have gone as smoothly…… the back issues he had in 2009 could have happened here, and with the burden of a fat contract, the fans would have much less patience……and fans gone sour, and a less friendly clubhouse to an outspoken newcomer, the Giants coulda very well be the team that DFA'ed him in 2010……but as things worked out, he is the right guy at the right place at the right time, and keep it rolling cause the Giants are putting something special together this year…..something that is no guarantee to be here in 2011…..

TIP OF THE CAP :
ROWAND
I always figured Rowand would go full blown Molina on us if put in a part time roll…..and I gotta tell you….I think for the first time in a Giant uniform, I actually feel a little warmth towards him…..that slide into 2nd during the 5th inning was Keeanu-esque, with the tag following Rowand's arm that kept moving, while Rowand's lower body comes into the bag and then hooks Castro's ankle to prevent an overslid…..….and then the ill advised dive into 1st to lead off the 9th, he hit the dirt so hard, that he could crap some replica Etruscan Pottery in the morning……

TORRES
1 swing……..1 swing baby……..

SANCHEZ
Well, looks like Fontenot is paying dividends already……and Sanchie was 2 for 2 with a walk and a perfect sac bunt in the 9th…….

POSEY/ HUFF
0 hits, 4 walks, 2 runs scored……

PABLO
The Triple would been outta most parks….and the Homer was out of this one……

CAIN
Settled down after a rocky first, but the pitch count got him after 6

JOKER

DOGGIES

Nothing goes better with a Giants Win, then a Dodgers Loss…..A great pair, like Mays and McCovey, Peanut Butter and Jelly, Abbott and Costello, Lasorda and Slim Fast, Matt Kemp and Apathy, Casey Blake and his Wife Rosie Palm…….ahh but tonight, was not just any kind of loss….no this was a gourmet loss complete with blowing a lead for their best starter, a temper tantrum in the dugout, a key boot from the biggest redass on the team, a lecture from the wise manager right before the death blow to a closer with no confidence…..ummm, Broxton… your tears are so delicious……and on a side note, congrats to Kemp back in the lineup after being benched got 3 hits and 4 RBI's …and of course one of those hits was a single that woulda been a double if he was running hard…….and get this stat geeks…..Matt Kemp is got 19 HR's and 63 RBI's…..and actually has a NEGATIVE WPA….in other words, despite his tools and individual numbers, he is actually COSTING wins, not adding to wins…..in other words, he is doing his damage in low leverage situations, when the game is NOT on the line……

SMACK OF THE STICK :
RAY/ LOPEZ/ MOTA/ ROMO
Blowing the 4 run lead and the Cain W was a true team effort…..the lone run by Ray, and then the Lopez Mota Romo combo in the 8th…..none of them earned a Joker by themselves, but together they certainly deserve at least a smack of the stick……

NATE
K in his only AB, and might have had a chance on that Hill Double had he broke the right way off the bat……but if he coulda made it would have been one hell of a play…..maybe not a smack of the stick, perhaps just a nudge……

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(The fine print: There will be cussing and bad taste. This is written with the heat of the moment feel you may have during the game, with rational thought sprinkled in now and then. This is entertainment folks, sure there is a lot of truth and I am a genius, but this is all about having a laugh and enjoying the ride…….now lets go heckle Jeff Kent in when he gets inducted to Cooperstown..)

by merkin

GAMEBALL and JOKER ==> CUBS at GIANTS 08/11

2010-08-12T00:21:00.000-07:00

GAMEBALL and JOKER ==> CUBS at GIANTS 08/11

GAMEBALL

PAT

In the giddy days of Pat in a fresh new Giants Uni, I went on a short limb to claim 10-15 homers in a Giants uni with an OBP north of .375 Well wasn't looking too good when Pat was on the Pine but after his 8th ding of the year in the Creamscicle and Orange, I will go back and point out that I am a genius…….Man, the more I see this guy, the more I like him……Yes, he has that Uribesque swing hard in case you hit it style at the plate, even with 2 strikes……but unlike Uribe, he works counts with 4.10 Pitches per Plate Appearance leading the team just a tick ahead of Torres 4.06 Pitches per PA……And then when he isn't in the game, you see him in dugout acting like he is one of the coaches, making the rounds to players and coaches alike……but tonight, the big contribution was on the diamond……recovering on a ball to the wall to hit Uribe with a good throw to relay, and then in the 8th, taking some off speed jumk deep to left for the go ahead run that would win the game and drive the girls wild…..its good to be Pat…….Glory…..Money…..and all the MILF a guy could want…….

TIP OF THE CAP :
ROWAND
I have to give a tip of the cap to Aaron….the Biggest red ass on the team, is all about team coming off the bench……and he has been contributing where he can, and tonight it was a go ahead homer in the 6th that gave the Giants a short lived lead…..

TORRES
Couple more hits, a walk and most importantly got the Giants started in the 1st inning with a single and steal

HUFF
Couple knocks to keep his average above .300……man, the bar has been raised for Aubrey……1 hit in 5 days and it’s a slump……hell for Rowand that’s a good week……

URIBE
Really made that play on the relay home, Dewitt had 4 steps past 3rd when the throw hit Uribe's glove…..quick release, strong arm, accurate throw, and Dewitt was out by 10 feet…….and extra thanks for accuracy, a little off target and it coulda been ugly…..a little high and it coulda been fatal…….

POSEY
Didn't do much with the bat…..but you gotta love this kid, seems to come out smelling like roses in every situation…..and the collision at home plate, stands firm but gives ground on a spin to help absorb the blow….and comes out the winner on the field, and in the clubhouse with Posey unscathed and Dewitt with a face full of catchers helmet…….

ROMO/ WILSON
This 1-2 punch is looking about as good as they have all year long…..

JOKER

BYRD

Marlon Byrd and Pat the Bat in the same game…..my mind drifts back to an afternoon in 2003…. a younger Merkin spent the afternoon in 1st row of Section 140 alternately heckling Byrd and Burrell……..Byrd was a rookie Centerfielder making the minimum and hitting around .300……Pat was playing his first season of a HUGE (back then) $50 Million contract and hitting about .200……you can imagine…….Hey Pat is this what they get for $50M????... Hey Marlon,.300 for minimum wage…….200 is $50 Million, quit trying so hard……and if you have been to a game with me before, you probably know I am a very very loud man……and I understand the importance of brevity and enunciation while heckling…well, Pat the Bat was the star that day hitting a game tying shot in the 8th, and a go ahead homer in the 10th to shut my ass up…….and Despite Byrd having a career year in 2010 and Pat clearing waivers earlier in the year…..Pat has racked up close to $70M in earnings compared with Marlons $9 Million…..Pat is still being paid MORE than Marlon for 2010…..and Pat overshadowed Marlon again today with a go ahead Homer in the 8th……some things never chance, Eh Marlon?

SMACK OF THE STICK :
DEWITT
Dumbass….goes into the catchers gear face first for the out…..fucking Dodger…

ZITO
For giving up a first pitch BOMB to a leftie on a curve…..and for giving proponents of the DH some lowlights with the bat

FONTENOT
Shades of the Sanchez trade last year where he just moved clubhouses…..of course this time it was DURING the series….and that’s gotta be weird….Mike is a play versus Lefties at your own risk, owning a career 0.235 BA and .348 SLG vs southpaws…..and his .284 in 2010 is almost exclusively versus righties….with only 7 Plate Appearances versus Lefties……but he did have 2 hits in those 7 chances……

FSANCHEZ
Big vote of confidence with the Fontenot acquisition…..and you can smell that platoon coming…..Freddy has traditionally Killed Lefties (.351) and held his own against Righties (.277)…..well this year, he is Killing Lefties (.350) and getting killed versus Righties (.232)…..even his solid glove work won't save him from a short side of a platoon if he cant get it going soon……

EVAN CRAWFORD
It took my brain about 5 seconds to register the trade of Infielder Evan Crawford as announced on KNBR….to recap my brain interpreting the announcement…..…."Fontenot for Crawford…..Evan, Evan….infielder?...they clearly said Evan….outfielder right? No they clearly said Evan…….that's the thin black dude in Arizona…..they wouldn't trade Brandon for Fontenot…..gotta be Evan….."

SAN DIEGO
One can't help but look forward to the series this weekend…..what are the chances I can get a BEAT south LA…BEAT south LA chant going?.....rolls off the tongue better than BEAT north Mexico…BEAT north Mexico……..

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(The fine print: There will be cussing and bad taste. This is written with the heat of the moment feel you may have during the game, with rational thought sprinkled in now and then. This is entertainment folks, sure there is a lot of truth and I am a genius, but this is all about having a laugh and enjoying the ride…….now lets go heckle Jeff Kent in when he gets inducted to Cooperstown..)

by merkin

GAMEBALL and JOKER ==> CUBS at GIANTS 08/09

2010-08-10T00:13:00.000-07:00

GAMEBALL and JOKER ==> CUBS at GIANTS 08/09

GAMEBALL

BULLPEN

6 Pitchers 5 1/3 innings, 2 hits, 1 walk, 8 K's…..and off course the BIG W…..The bullpen was simply kick ass after a shortish outing by Bumgarner…..Bowker Martinez and Turpen was a cheap price to pay for a couple middling arms that seem to have gelled the pen…..and throw in the trade of Molina for Ray and Micheal Main…you basically traded some spare parts for a bullpen depth and a prospect upgrade (Turpen to Main)……so the Giants get help NOW, and the prospect core is intact…..hell even the more fringe prospects are intact……anyway you slice it, that’s fucking good stuff……

TIP OF THE CAP :
POSEY
A couple early line drive outs, but then got the big double got the offense started for the Giants

TORRES
made up for his earlier K with the bases juiced, with a seeing eye single through the left side to tie the game

BURRELL
I am sure he was fuming when Trammel walked Posey to set up the game winner…..he was swinging at that first pitch and he was swinging hard…...yeah, you're right….. he always swings hard…..

RENT
Looks old on defense, but got 2 hits including the leadoff single to start the game winning rally…..

BUMGARNER
Punched dugout with his non-pitching hand……now that’s veteran savvy right there…..

COMMERCIALIZING the DEAD
You know what, I am ok with this……deadheads have long been Hippie Entrepreneurs with their selling of illict and non illict substances to fund following the band…..you can't blame the Giants for cashing in on a good thing……

JOKER

DEADHEADS

OK, Fucking crunchy hippes have every much right to be at a ballgame and cheer for the Giants as anyone……but a few things bother me…..first of all I fucking HATE Patchooli…..good god, Patchooli does not take the place of soap…..instead of BO, you just smell like Patchooli and BO…….second, I don't want to buy your vegan falafel pita, go peddle that shit somewhere else……third, quit huffing so much nitrous…..affectionately nicknamed Hippie Crack in my youth, that shit is straight up brain cell repellant…….and for the women….shave your pits……I mean good god, this isn't France…..fucking nasty…..like 10x nastier than hair legs……makes me cringe just thinking about it…….and lastly, you are not a hardcore Giants fan…sorry, if you have no idea where you left your Hacky Sack, let alone who Sergio Romo is, you are just not hardcore……

SMACK OF THE STICK :
FLANNERY
Tough one……after that bobble, with 2 outs….with Renteria coming up…..I think you have to take a chance and send him and hope for an errant throw…..was a lot closer than I thought it would be……but in the end he had no chance…..

SANDOVAL
RBI Double ticked off the glove and the error on the double clutch and short hop throw to 1st……

MERKIN
I grew up in the Bay Area and went to 20-30 dead shows while I was in High School and College….The Greek, the Coliseum, Frost, and Cal Expo were the venues, and I can say I was a Poser….well, at least in the sense I never really was a big fan of the Dead……but many of my friends were….and I loved to party and have fun and really the whole scene was a blast…..the Chemicals, the Music, the People, even some of the Women….all that shit was pretty fucking cool and I had as much fun as one can have and still be alive….but somewhere along the line I got old, cut my hair, grew up and moved on…..

WELLEMEYER
Sent packing after 1 appearance in the bigs…….gotta love it, the org has a sense of urgency and with the addition of a couple bullpen arms, Todd became the odd man out……

But Seriously, it's San Francisco and that means that everyone can do whatever the fuck they want as long as they don't disturb the rights of others…..and not all Dead Heads meet the stereotypes I portrayed……but stereotyping is a lot more fun to read and get excited about……wouldn't be too entertaining if I just went along with their hippieselvesand …….I really REALLY hate Patchooli

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(The fine print: There will be cussing and bad taste. This is written with the heat of the moment feel you may have during the game, with rational thought sprinkled in now and then. This is entertainment folks, sure there is a lot of truth and I am a genius, but this is all about having a laugh and enjoying the ride…….now lets go heckle Jeff Kent in when he gets inducted to Cooperstown..)

by merkin

GAMEBALL and JOKER ==> GIANTS at BRAVOS 08/06

2010-08-07T00:28:00.000-07:00

The Wise Hall of Famer Casey Stengel's has one of the best quotes in baseball. "Most ball games are lost, not won." and the Giants put that quote into action tonight, being just good enough not to lose…..but as much as this feels like a gift from the Braves, the Giants put themselves in a position to win by playing good clean baseball, and capitalizing on mistakes….you think the Cardinals are giving back those 2006 World Series rings after scoring 8 unearned runs in the series? Think the Mets are upset that Buckner was the focal point of the series in 1986? Its part of the game, and sometimes being the team that doesn't screw the pooch is good enough…..

GAMEBALL and JOKER ==> GIANTS at BRAVOS 08/06

GAMEBALL

ZITO

It may not have been the prettiest game he has pitched, and he may have been in line for the loss before some late innings….ummm…"heroics"…..but I have to give the Gameball to Barry for notching his 3rd 10 strikeout game of the year and holding the Braves in check only allowing Gonzales jack and Chipper's wall scraper….this was the first time he has notched 3 double digit strikeout games in a single year since 2001….and in a Giants uniform he had only notched 1 double digit strikeout game before this year……and honestly, not getting the win may be a good thing….as it seems that Barry pitches best when he has a big old chip on that shoulder…..and in the big picture, Barry doesn't need W's on the resume to get fans on his side, all that has to happen is Barry keep pitching like he did tonight and for the GIANTS to get those W's…..cause the more W's the Giants get, the more people stop thinking about that price tag…….

TIP OF THE CAP :
HUFF
Started his day with a pretty cool interview on KNBR ….then got a RBI Ground out in the 1st and then ended the day with the two biggest plays of the night…..a Hit By Pitch to lead off the 9th…..and a Walk to lead off the 11th…..both times coming around to score critical runs

TORRES
Was a 1 man wrecking crew in the 1st inning with a single, 2 steals and a run……and along with Huff, the Giants have 2 players in the top 20 in runs scored in the National League…….the last time the Giants had ONE player in the top 20 in runs scored was Bonds in 2004…..and the last time the Giants had TWO players in the top 20 was Bonds and Kent in 2002……Torres and Huff…..Bonds and Kent…..betcha were making those comparisons in spring training….

BURRELL
Never take that sac fly for granted…..especially in a extra innings tie ballgame on the road

BULLPEN
Romo, Ray, Wilson, and Lopez…..4 solid…..and suddenly with Romo and Ray finding their form, and Lopez looking more than a Loogy…..the Giants pen is looking better than it did even BEFORE the injuries to Affeldt and Runzler…..maybe those injuries turn into one of those weird positives where guys step up and find themselves when the going gets …..tough

LOPEZ
1 inning 3 lefties outs and a single to the right hander……he is looking like just what the Giants needed…..and sorry Bowker and Martinez, Lopez has already proven more useful this year to this team......as Lopez is plugging a critical hole, where Bowker and Martinez would be extra pieces without a role……

PABLO
Put the ball in play……which ….well…..lets just say that Pablo doesn't always put the ball in play

JOKER

LARRY

Oh man, gotta love that shit……the man with the go ahead homer……Mr Atlanta Braves (sorry Dale Murphy)……future hall of fame gamer……the best Braves Position Player since Hank Aaron (sorry again Dale Murphy)….blows the play of the night ….charging a Pablo grounder trying to cut the run down at the plate……he gives us that Ole' Bullshit to tie the game that the Braves would lose in extras……would Huff have been out on that play…..yes…..did he need to go the backhand on that play…..probably not…..with your momentum heading to the plate, with the play right in front of you in your field of vision, with the angle in fair territory giving you a natural throwing lane….that's the easiest throw on the diamond…..and with 1 out, Huff didn't get a good jump and WAS LESS than HALFWAY down the line……yes, the backhand is the natural most comfortable play for a vet……but he had time to hang back a little square it up and make a throw…..sure you see vets backhand that all the time, but you better be sure to catch it on a short hop, and not the in betweener that Chipper tried to come up with…..

SMACK OF THE STICK :
ISHI
Made a nice play on a Hayward one hopper early in the game……but with the bases juiced and the Giants in need of sac fly in the 9th…….hit into the DP……..never take those Sac Flys for granted…..

ALEX GONZALEZ
First of all……quit changing teams…….I lost track of which Alex Gonzales you are……are you the one that fields shitty and can hit a little that was with the Marlins? or the one who fields shitty and can't hit that was with the Cubs?…..well, after watching tonights game I am guessing you were the guy that was with the Marlins…….popped a Homer in the 5th…and by the way, that was probably the only homer that woulda been out of ATT of the 4 the Braves have hit in 2 days….and then bounced a throw to Infante to keep the 9th innings alive and setup Jones Miscue

INFANTE
And by the way, you HAVE to catch that ball……sure it was a throw in the dirt, but that’s a makeable play….you should get 1/2 of Gonzales Error on that play…..or at least 1/4………

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(The fine print: There will be cussing and bad taste. This is written with the heat of the moment feel you may have during the game, with rational thought sprinkled in now and then. This is entertainment folks, sure there is a lot of truth and I am a genius, but this is all about having a laugh and enjoying the ride…….now lets go heckle Jeff Kent in when he gets inducted to Cooperstown..)

by merkin

GAMEBALL and JOKER ==> GIANTS at ROCKIES 08/03

2010-08-05T00:13:00.000-07:00

The seemingly Invincible Giants are actually quite Vincible… all it takes is the unfriendly confines of Coors Field, the favorite for the Cy Young on the mound, and a team full of sluggers facing your rookie #5 starter……all that being said, I guess that’s why this loss have evoked very little discontent in a fan base notorious for running around screaming and flailing their arms about any time the teams losing streak reaches 2……so, yes we lost…..and I really don't feel that bad……in fact all I can think of is bring on the Braves….

GAMEBALL and JOKER ==> GIANTS at ROCKIES 08/03

GAMEBALL

HUFF

Well no one told Mr Huff that Ubaldo was unhittable…..Huff got a bloop and a line drive to go 2 for 3 off the Untouchable One……but perhaps most impressive was the out, where it looked to be a sure DP……but the "best athlete on the team" beat it out without an problem……

TIP OF THE CAP :
FSANCHEZ
Also Collected 2 hits, although he cheated a little getting one of his hits of the Mortal Matt Belisle

POSEY
Got the lone RBI……and named Bad Ass Fucker of the Month by Giantsboard.com…..might not be as cool as NL Player of the Month, but it comes with a pretty cool wallet

CASILLA/ MOTA
For not being related to Bautista….

JOKER

ANDRES

4 AB's…..4 K's……Andres was overmatched with 3 K's vs Ubaldo that included 5 swings and misses (ok, 4 but the umpire didn't have X-Mo on the K in the 1st)……this was Andres first career 4 strike out game and I don’t think anyone saw it coming…..coming off a 3 hit game and a hot July…….only 1 K off Ubaldo in 8 career PA's…..I will just write this off as a bad day……maybe he forgot his meds in Burrell's trunk……

SMACK OF THE STICK :
AROD
ARod got to 600…and congrats……but after taking so long between 599 and 600….and being the youngest player to get to 600…..all I can hear is debate on whether or not he gets to 762……..It should be a piece of cake, but when you production had fallen off a cliff to the point where not only is he 4th on his own team in HR's, he is actually being outslugged by…..wait for it…….Andres Torres……and its not that close with.512 compared to .467….

BOCHY
So I finally understand WHY Bochy has this Bautista fetish……He is using Denny because with the shortage of Lefties in the pen, Denny was the Leftie Specialist…..are you FUCKING SERIOUS???? Where the hell are you getting that??? is it because he throws a change up, cause I see NO evidence to support this "THEORY"…..Hey, I am all for subjective evaluation (check the sig), but come on Bochy, look at the numbers sometime……ok maybe THEORETICALLY he should get lefties out……but at this point he is an equal opportunity HACK…..

BAUTISTA
Hey, did you know he is a cousin of Pedro and Ramon Martinez??? I am guessing distant cousin……very very distant

BUMGARNER
Just because I have heard Wellemeyer's name invoked 20 times today

IANETTA
Do NOT try to "Cock Block" a fastball

PADILLA
No hitter into the 6th….Watching as Vinny told the feel good story, about how he was so hungry as a child he ate his brother or something……and after that line drive ticked of Loney's glove…. well, lets just say if you find Loney's body in the brush in Glassell Park … I bet I know who did it…..

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(The fine print: There will be cussing and bad taste. This is written with the heat of the moment feel you may have during the game, with rational thought sprinkled in now and then. This is entertainment folks, sure there is a lot of truth and I am a genius, but this is all about having a laugh and enjoying the ride…….now lets go heckle Jeff Kent in when he gets inducted to Cooperstown..)

by merkin

GAMEBALL and JOKER ==> GIANTS at ROCKIES 08/02

2010-08-04T00:27:00.001-07:00

Well that was strange…a game 97% free of Torture…..in Colorado no less…… you know this team is on a roll when an big win to start a big August road trip…..well….feels like a no brainer…..

GAMEBALL and JOKER ==> GIANTS at ROCKIES 08/02

GAMEBALL

J SANCHEZ

And the perfect pitcher for tonights game was Sanchez… the combination of easy delivery, swing and miss stuff and shaky control was enough to put everyone to sleep waiting for action…….you look up and it’s the 6th before he gets into real trouble and then he just wriggles off the hook…….This kid's arm is just freaking amazing…… and tonight he was on…..or as on as he is lately…..6 innings with 3 hits and 4 walks and 9 K's…..including those 7 in a row…..who is guy???? 27 years old and we are still waiting for his to put it all together and dominate the league……but really, do you expect him to get any better???? Trying to find leftie comps to Jonathan, I look at the two stats that stand out…..through age 27

JSanchez 541 1/3 IP got 565 K's (9.4 K/9) and 278 BB's (4.6 BB/9)……

Koufax 1442 2/3 IP got 1474 K's (9.2 K/9) and 616 BB's (3.8 BB/9)

The Unit 607 2/3 IP got 577 K's (8.5 K/9) and 375 BB's (5.6 BB/9)

El Sid 1212 1/3 IP got 1153 K's (8.6 K/9) and 491 BB's (3.6 BB/9)

OPerez 1065 1/3 IP got 1089 K's (8.2 K/9) and 586 BB's (5.0 BB/9)

Each of those pitchers had their control battles when they were young, and in the case of Oliver Perez he is still having those issues…….
The 1 thing that jumps out at me is each one of those players put together at least 1 FULL SEASON better than anything Jonathan has done so far……by 27 Koufax and Sid Fernandez had mostly conquered their control issues but both were only effective for a short time……
At age 27 Randy was "wild, but effective" until age 29 where he really came around…..
So what's the point of all this??? well, mental masturbation as always……but despite his continued struggles Jonathan is actually putting together a season BETTER than Randy Johnson did at age 27……and has BETTER CONTROL than Randy at this age……who knows if Jonathan finally puts it together……but despite our frustration watching all this potential……there is still a chance that he does put it all together…just who knows when, where, or if…..

TIP OF THE CAP :
TORRES
Got the party started with a single and collected 3 hits in total

POSEY
Came back from an 0-2 count in the first to run the count full before stroking a RBI single to right……Collected 3 hits and a walk

ISHI
The 3rd Player with 3 hits on the night including one of those RBI singles in the 1st

PAT
Blistered a RBI Single in the first and a BOMB to left in the 3rd

FSANCHEZ
HOMERED??? The humidor must be off…..and a fine play on a CarGo liner with the bases juiced to end the 7th….

LOPEZ
Picked up Ramirez and Sanchez in the 7th……

RAMIREZ
Welcome to the Giants

RAY
Clean innings

CASILLA
Limited the walks to 1 =)

JOKER

DODGERS…..

This keeps getting better and better……no write up last night, so I am ok going back to rehash…….How in the HELL do you go 5 for 5 and be the jackass??? So by now everyone heard Bowa ripping the Dodgers and Kemp……to which Kemp responded "There's more there," Kemp said. "I agree. It's something I need to sit here and think about and then change."…..Well, Kemp should do less thinking and more running as he became the goat of the Padres 10-5 rout when he failed to hustle on a would be RBI Single only to fail to score when Loney got tagged out going to third……the Dodgers had 7 hits in the first 3 innings and did not score…..and 0-0 going into the 4th, the Padres put up a 5 spot with the help of some shoddy infield defense……..The Dodgers walked around the field like a beaten team, and even Vin Scully had to throw in a comment……now this is I think after Kemps 4th hit of the night……."Its hard to believe that a player with Kemp's speed failed to score on that play"…which is as close as the Classiest Dodger would get to calling Kemp a jackass…..and Kemp's Mea Culpa? "I probably should have ran a little bit harder, and then we wouldn't be talking about that right now."…….Yeah, didn't we hear something like that BEFORE the game too…..talk is cheap……Kemp is one bad ass Mo Fo in the field and with the bat, but he is about 17 cheezeburgers and 5 gallons of ice cream away from being Andruw Jones…….You think Rihanna wants to hit that? Nah, at that point the best celebrity tang you gonna get is Nell Carter

SMACK OF THE STICK :
RAMIREZ
Welcome to the Giants, so walking people already? Did Rags get a hold of you?

RENT
Ended the streak of 5 straight runners on base, and the only player in the starting lineup without a hit…..and that INCLUDES the Jonathan who singled in the 1st…..

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(The fine print: There will be cussing and bad taste. This is written with the heat of the moment feel you may have during the game, with rational thought sprinkled in now and then. This is entertainment folks, sure there is a lot of truth and I am a genius, but this is all about having a laugh and enjoying the ride…….now lets go heckle Jeff Kent in when he gets inducted to Cooperstown..)

by merkin

GAMEBALL and JOKER ==> DOGGIES at GIANTS 08/01

2010-08-02T00:25:00.001-07:00

Great day at the yard…..as close as you can get to a playoff atmosphere in early August……games like this make me miss Candlestick, a win like tonight would have resulted in a post game where 58,000+ rabid Giants fans charged with Euphoria and Alcohol would wind their way down ramps and escalators and then fight their way out of those congested parking lots honking and screaming as Dodger fans did their best to hide any trace of blue…..would take close to an hour of sitting in exhaust fumes to hit 101 (not THE 101)…..but it was almost as fun as the game…….now the closest you can get to that experience is winding your way down the ramps like cattle while a few Beat LA chants break out right in front of unthreatened Dodger fans….but enough about the good old days…….this is today, and today was FUCKING AWESOME……yes, that is the absolute best description for a day like today……I am not ready to declare October Baseball in San Francisco just yet……but I tell you what, today went a LONG WAY towards building this teams confidence……with the hated Dodgers in town…..with sell out crowds every night……with the team riding a wave of success……just FUCKING AWESOME…..this is BIGGER than 3 wins in a row…..this was a clean sweep that has the Dodgers teetering on the edge of contention……and has the Giants feeling like they could take on anyone anywhere anytime…….well the Giants are taking that feeling on the road to Colorado where they have to deal with Cook and Jimenez and a hot Rockies team……but mark you calendars for August 13-15th….where the Giants face their next big test ……a 3 day series versus the Padres……..and even if the Padres don't have the same rivalry game going…..October will be on the line and you will want to be here……

GAMEBALL and JOKER ==> DOGGIES at GIANTS 08/01

GAMEBALL

CAIN

Off the schnide….big time……Cain was FUCKING AWESOME…..to look at the line score you wouldn't get the feeling for how dominant Cain was…until Carrol's liner through the hole in the 8th, the Dodgers 3 hits were all grounders…..and I am not talking 1 hoppers through the hole…..I am talking multiple bouncers hit in the soft part of the infield defense……..Cain had it all working….Fastball Change Curve…..getting everything over for strikes…..and getting tons of swing throughs……14 of Cain's 78 strikes were swing and miss……Cain was so good that after Renteria's triple I heard a few people boldly proclaim BALLGAME in the bottom of the 6th inning……and Kershaw's body language showed it as well because it really felt like the Dodgers would need to move the heavens just to score a single run…….

TIP OF THE CAP :
RENT
And the meek shall inherit the earth…….but before then Renteria will have a good game…..and he had that game tonight with a nifty play up the middle to take a hit away from Martin and then in the hit of the game laced a triple through the left center gap for a 2 run triple and the ballgame…..

ROWAND
Faced Kershaw without fear……fisted a single to center……legged out a groundball error and took an intentional walk and came around to score on Renteria's triple……but the Rowand highlight had to be robbing a single from Furcal on a sinking liner I was sure was going to be a hit off the bat……

POSEY
Well the Dodgers won the beanball war……but the Giants fight Fire with Bullshit……and gotta hand it to Posey for complaining to the Umpire about where Blake was setting up in the box…..if you notice the camera pans to Kemp on first saying something like "What the fuck…..mumble mumble fuck mumble….." and just a moment later Cain picks off Kemp….so despite snapping his 2 game hit streak, Posey found a way to contribute…..

LOPEZ
one hitter, one leftie, one out……Sabean = Super Genius

WILSON
After going full count on the first three hitters……finally sealed the deal with a Kemp fly out to center……

JOKER

DODGERS…..

Well…..lets see…..
Blake was dropped to 5th in the order,……was taunted by Posey and West in his first At Bat…….ended up going 0 for 3 with three BIG K's…..and left on the on deck circle to end the game……
Kemp…..picked off 1st…..took an 0 for 4…….and misplayed Renteria's ball into a triple…..with a better angle it is possible that Rowand woulda been held at 3rd……maybe…..
Furcal….took the collar…..and tossed in a couple throwing errors….
Theriot…..greeted his new fan base with a nice 0 for 4 with 2 K's…..
Manny….oh yeah…..in his usual spot….no where to be found collecting a fat paycheck,…….
Man this whole team is playing like they have October tee times reserved

SMACK OF THE STICK :
MARTY LURIE
So I when stuck on the Bay Bridge trying to go home, I will listen to Giants postgame…..and Marty may be a nice guy……but he is a asskissing jelly fish…..he was actually congratulating Bochy on leaving Burrell in the Saturday game to hit the homer, and not going to Nate as a defensive replacement…….WHAT THE FUCK……hey Marty…..the Giants were DOWN by 1……even Bochy pointed that out to you…..WHO THE FUCK MAKES A DEFENSIVE REPLACEMENT DOWN BY A RUN????? good god, even Bochy isn't THAT stupid…….

BOWKER
Don't get me wrong I like the kid…..but to all those wishing John well and talking about the Pirates giving him a chance…..well……the Pirates have better alternatives too…..and Bowker leaves Fresno for Indianapolis……..that sounds like a downgrade to me…….

JOE MORGAN (some gleened from Twitter, as I was lucky enough to be AT the game)
Joe Morgan is a man of many talents…..as shown tonight on ESPN……
"He (Renteria) knows where 1st base is, he doesn't even have to look" -The Geographer
"3 out of 4 is 75%, 2 out of 3 is 66%" - The Math Teacher
"If you walk someone with a 2-run lead, you bring the tying run to the plate" - The Strategist

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(The fine print: There will be cussing and bad taste. This is written with the heat of the moment feel you may have during the game, with rational thought sprinkled in now and then. This is entertainment folks, sure there is a lot of truth and I am a genius, but this is all about having a laugh and enjoying the ride…….now lets go heckle Jeff Kent in when he gets inducted to Cooperstown..)

by merkin

http://s51.photobucket.com/albums/f400/jackj0000/random/?action=view¤t=blakedouchesmall.jpg

GAMEBALL and JOKER ==> DOGGIES at GIANTS 07/31

2010-08-01T00:20:00.001-07:00

Little sun baked an with the picnic + game, tired as heck……

You know…..Sabean did exactly what I would hope he would do……not that I would complain about a big bat coming in for a decent price…..but I was just hoping he wouldn't screw the pooch on some dumbass fleece of a trade…..or give up something of consequence for nothing……and in the end, he basically got a couple arms for the pen that well…..they have arms…….but gave up very little….I mean lets be honest guys like Joe Martinez and Bowker are expendable…they are mid-20's guys who have had shots in the show and don't fit into the current plan……of course, there is a chance they could suddenly blossom, but they aren't exactly like some of the younger prospects where we don't yet know what we have…….and then there was Turpen was a Double A bullpen arm that had some promise….losing these players do not damage the long term value of the talent base, and they get a couple guys they can stick in the pen until Affeldt and Runzler get back…..and in the case of Lopez, just having a sidewinding leftie in the pen keeps the opposing lineups honest……and with those splits, make sure he is 100% loogy….

GAMEBALL and JOKER ==> DOGGIES at GIANTS 07/31

GAMEBALL

PAT

What can you say, he is a swing from the heels kind of guy who racks up the K's and the BB's…. and today he came through in the best spot so far as a Giant…..man, the crowd was quiet as hell into the middle innings, with our attempts at getting any sort of chat going meeting with only limited results……it wasn't as if the crowd was inattentive…no, the exact opposite…..they were so focused on the game at hand they couldn't be bothered with such frivolities as chanting…….as the innings moved on the focus turned to stress….and then after the Blake bomb that stress turned dred……and after Zito was pinch hit for and Bautista in the pen we KNEW Torres would have to come through or the game was over…….well, Torres didn't come through……and despite Denny's best efforts, it was still 1-0 with a runner on 1st and Pat at the plate with a 3-2 count……when Pat laced a line drive that looked to be right at Podsednik…..maybe it will get over his head for a double…….and it kept on sailing …….and once that ball cleared the fence into the 1st row of the bleachers…..the whole fucking place erupted…….

TIP OF THE CAP :
ZITO
Pitched his ass off…..other than the 4th inning, wasn't really in trouble all day…..

POSEY
Three line drives =- 1 double and 2 outs…….and then took one off the shoulder in front of Burrell's blast……

MOTA
Fucking Money…..pounding the strike zone with that nasty fastball changeup combo to notch the save picking up Bautista and Wilson

JOKER

COLLETTI

OK Lilly wasn't a bad deal…..but he's a 34 year old leftie coming off shoulder surgery and has seen his velocity fall into the mid 80's…….but Ned didn't give up much for Lilly and he is an improvement over what they have now…….but the Dotel deal was a bit over the top… a 22 year old.Lambo coming off a 50 day PED suspension is still a legitimate power hitting outfield prospect and James McDonald who despite being 26 has tools and is still developing as a pitcher having been converted from a hitter in 2006…..both players look like they would be contributors to the Dodgers of the future……but the real question is…..5.5 games out of the wild card, with Broxton burnt out and you offense on the slide……do you really think you should be buyers???? that farm system was already depleted by trades the past few years and now you are basically clearing out the cupboard to make a run of it this year????......if you were able to use Manny to replenish the system while getting Dotel and Lilly, these moves would make more sense…..but you got a core of Billingsley Kershaw Kemp and Ethier…and the way things are going, you won't have anything coming off that farm to help them out while they are still young…..yeah, Dee Gordon is still in the system……but surely Ned will trade him for an past him prime veteran this offseason…….good job Ned….keep it up…..

SMACK OF THE STICK :
BOCHY
What the hell is up with the Bautista fetish…….Mota hadn't pitched since Wednesday….which I made abundantly clear to everyone within earshot of me as we watched Bautista warming……Mota was the obvious choice…..I was convinced he must have some super secret injury to not be warming during the bottom of the 7th……

TORRE
Quit hitting our fucking players you jackass……you will get yours for sure

FOX
Kenny Albert, Chris Rose, and Eric Karros……I would rather have Tim McCarver and Joe Buck……ok, maybe I went a little too far there…..

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(The fine print: There will be cussing and bad taste. This is written with the heat of the moment feel you may have during the game, with rational thought sprinkled in now and then. This is entertainment folks, sure there is a lot of truth and I am a genius, but this is all about having a laugh and enjoying the ride…….now lets go heckle Jeff Kent in when he gets inducted to Cooperstown..)

by merkin

GAMEBALL and JOKER ==> DOGGIES at GIANTS 07/30

2010-07-30T23:49:00.000-07:00

GAMEBALL and JOKER ==> DOGGIES at GIANTS 07/30

GAMEBALL

HUFF

"Sabean is a devious genius…..he has wanted Huff on this team for a long time…..but instead of obtaining him last year, he traded for Garko throwing the media, the fans, and competing GM's way off his trail……and when the offseaon began, he didn’t start off handing Huff wads of cash……he went after Nick Johnson knowing he would end up a Yankee and then LaRoche, knowing he would never play in SF…..the whole time Sabean the Genius KNEW that after an off year Huff would be still be sitting there waiting for any chance at a starting job…..So in comes Sabean, with a "well, no one else wants my money" offer, the veritable Homely Chick at the bar at 2AM settle for kinda approach……ahhh, but like those cheesy teenage chick flicks, when Aubrey let down his pony tail and took off those glasses……he was a stunner……the stunner that Sabean knew all along"……..excerpt from the upcoming Authorized Biography of Brian Sabean…..How I Never Won a World Series, but Still Managed to Draw 3 Million Fans a Year……or …….We're In This
But seriously, what a find…..and with 20 HR's in 104 games, he is on a pace for 30 Homers a number only passed by Bonds Kent and Aurillia at Pac Bell/ SBC/ ATT Park…..

TIP OF THE CAP :
TIMMY
Had small bouts of control issues, but after getting out of trouble in the 2nd and 3rd, got a little run support and found his groove….not allowing a runner past 2nd base for the rest of the game……ok TECHNICALLY Furcal passed second……but never made it to THIRD……yeah……that was cool……

RAY
FUCK….at least RAY THREW STRIKES…….

URIBE
Homer got the Giants on the board and got those offensive juices flowing in the bottom of the 2nd...then Gunned Ethier at the plate in the plate in the top of the 3rd

TORRES
Two more hits and a steal……

SANCHEZ
Just for that Relay to nail Furcal……

JOKER

BOCHY

Joker two nights in a row eh???? Bautista….and Sanchez to close it out eh?......yeah, that’s gonna work……those two have as much control as Keith Moon in a Hotel room…..for the kids out there, think Lindsey Lohan in a Pharmacy After Hours……..What point were you trying to prove there Bochy…..yeah, Wilson was unavailable, but just go to Ray and get it over with…Hell even Mota woulda been an improvement over Sanchez and Bautista…was this a cry for help…QUICK SABES GET ON THE PHONE AND GET TREVOR HOFFMAN…….good god, it’s the fucking Dodgers, and you got 40,000+ rabid fans ready to kick your ass if you squander that lead…….and don’t expect Mattingly to bail you out this time…..

SMACK OF THE STICK :
SABEAN
And by the way……I am NOT a proponent of paying for the big fish out there…..but there has got to be SOMETHING you can do…..and a short term fix is fine by me…..you can leave the Major League Roster untouched and maybe move Pegeuro or Fairley or something……and shore up this pen….you got Huff and Torres and maybe Uribe with Career years…..this might not happen next year, and the way this bullpen is looking we need something NOW just to sniff October and keep the rotation from being just worked to death…….

TORRES
Misplay in center helped get Romo out of the game and bring in the clowns……

THE CLOWNS
Bautista and J Sanchez……meh……..

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(The fine print: There will be cussing and bad taste. This is written with the heat of the moment feel you may have during the game, with rational thought sprinkled in now and then. This is entertainment folks, sure there is a lot of truth and I am a genius, but this is all about having a laugh and enjoying the ride…….now lets go heckle Jeff Kent in when he gets inducted to Cooperstown..)

by merkin

GAMEBALL and JOKER ==> MARLINS at GIANTS 07/28

2010-07-29T00:28:00.000-07:00

That’s a fangraphs kinda game…..

Top Performers (+0.50 = a win because you naturally have a 50/50 chance to win)
Torres = +.291
Ray = +.129
Schierholtz = +.126

Worst Perfomers
Wilson = -.304
Ishikawa = -.088
Sandoval = -.060

GAMEBALL and JOKER ==> MARLINS at GIANTS 07/28

GAMEBALL

TORRES

4 hits including a shot into the water and the game winning walk off "single"……Andres has moved from feel good story, to great dumpster dive find….now, they way he keeps on hitting he is closing in on……STAR STATUS???? ok, maybe a little premature, but the little man is doing it all……with the glove with his legs….and my oh my with his bat…..in his limited playing time he is top 20 in the NL in Runs, Doubles, Steals, On Base, and OPS…yes OPS where he is #4 among NL outfielders ….and in a couple more obscure stats he is top 20 in NL in Runs Created and Isolated Power (slg-avg)
And the best part…..although he has bounced around baseball for years, his service time means that we have him under control for 3 more years, and he will surely make some nice cash in Arbitration…..but I have the feeling it still will come at a discount of what he could get on the open market……and for those that think its impossible for a 32 year old to suddenly become a successful major leaguer….I grant that it is very rare, but no unprecedented…..my mind drifts back to another speedster that bounced around until age 32……and My Man Otis Nixon went on to have 7 more solid seasons…(yes, I have used the comp before)..certainly not the same kind of skill set that Torres has shown this year…..Otis had no power and tons more speed…..but I think the comp shows that not only late blooming possible….but sustaining that success……and Otis' was able to hang on until 39 as a speedster……surely it is possible that Torres can hang on as a speedster with some pop, as bats usually age better than legs……

And I can't get enough of this……

TIP OF THE CAP :
URIBE
Was in line for the gameball in regulation…..singling in 2 in the 1st and then flashing some speed while tripling home two in the 3rd…..but after collecting 3 hits in 3 AB's……couldn't keep the magic going with a chance to win it in the 9th…..K's on a 1-2 curveball after going down in the count 0-2….but still 3 hits and 4 RBI…..hey……that’s not a bad day

RAY/ROMO
At least a couple pitchers showed up…..and they were both pivotal…..with Romo getting the ball to the 9th, and Ray setting up the win in 10

POSEY
Ho hum, just a 21 game hitting streak…….so I keep hearing people say something about 17-4 in the Giants last 21…..21…..wonder if there is any correlation?.....
let me calculate (BABIP/ UZR15 ^wRC ….. the answer is 42……and that’s not a Jackie Robinson Reference

ROW ROW
2 more hits….thats 6 hits in 4 game, easily his best 4 game stretch since he got tagged in the face……and keep in mind, as crappy as Rowand has been for the Giants he HAS had at least 1 scorching month a year….hitting .343 for May 2008 and hitting .320 in June of 2009……it looked like April was going to be that month before he got hit….maybe he has a month left in him……and maybe Bochy will sit him when its over……yeah right……

RENT
Rowand and Rent setup the 10th inning winner with back to back singles….and both were hard hit shots……and Rent got the benefit of a bounce of infield dirt that hadn't been dragged for 4 innings……

HUFF
Got the Giants on the board with a Single in the 1st….and crossed the plate 2x for his 64th and 65th runs scored of the year….which leads the Giants and is 6th in the NL….

JOKER

BOCHY
Facebookers will need to click Bochy's pic for the full effect

FUCK…..with the tying run on 3rd and Dan Uggla at the plate……with Wes Helms looming on deck……every Giants fan at the game or within 20 feet of a radio TV or computer….at once said…..WALK EM……as a reflex…….and you know why???/ BECAUSE THEY HAVE BEEN PAYING ATTENTION AND KNOW THAT UGGLA IS IN THE FUCKING ZONE……good god……I have Krukow say 1000x that before a series you pick a player on the other team that you don't let beat you…..and guess what…..THATS FUCKING DAN UGGLA……..Yes, I know it would have put the lead run on base……Yes, I know Uggla's the Righty and Helms is the leftie...but its not that simple my friends…..first there are 2 down so putting the lead run on base is not nearly as bad as 1 or 0 out….second Uggla is like 20 for his last 15…..And finally consider the head to head matchups which Bochy should have at his fingertips…… UGGLA tattoo's Wilson to the tune of 4 for 7 including a HR the night before…….Helms is only 1 for 6 with FIVE strikeouts off Wilson…..yes, FIVE strikeouts in SIX at bats……so guess what happened…….Uggla gets that double to go 5 for 8 off Wilson…..before Helms made it SIX K's in SEVEN AB's……I won't even go into the other issues I have with Bochy,……not enough time in the day…..fucking jackass…..

SMACK OF THE STICK :
JSANCHEZ
After being staked to a big lead…..JSanchez continued his backwards slide into Tomko land…….Millon Dollar Arm…..and don't know what to do with it,……lets just hope his wife is as hot as Tomko's……

MARLINS ANNOUNCERS
If you are fortunate enough to have MLB extra innings like me, you have heard these clowns…..HIS NAME IS DAN UGGLA……what the fuck…..I swear to god they are the only two people in south florida excited about marlins baseball…..guess I can't blame them for trying…..

FREDDIE GONZALES or GIRADI or whoever the Fucking Marlins Manager of the Month is……
Orange Fucking Shoes???? Man, you should play here on a Friday….if those shoes are worth $1000…… 9 of these on the field are like $900,000

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(The fine print: There will be cussing and bad taste. This is written with the heat of the moment feel you may have during the game, with rational thought sprinkled in now and then. This is entertainment folks, sure there is a lot of truth and I am a genius, but this is all about having a laugh and enjoying the ride…….now lets go heckle Jeff Kent in when he gets inducted to Cooperstown..)

by merkin

GAMEBALL and JOKER ==> MARLINS at GIANTS 07/27

2010-07-28T00:22:00.000-07:00

GAMEBALL and JOKER ==> MARLINS at GIANTS 07/27

GAMEBALL

URIBE

Man, tough choice but we got to give it to the man who always seems to hit his homers in key spots of the game…..and tonight was no difference, greeting the first man out of the Marlins Bullpen Brian Sanches with a solo shot to give the Giants the lead in a tie game in the 8th….that was his 14th homer of the year….and of those 14 homers, 8 have either tied the game of given the Giants the lead……for comparisons sake, that’s as many as Huff who has a team leading 19 homers of which 8 have tied the game or given the Giants the lead……so its not you imagination……Uribe reeks of clutch…..and has one of the best beginnings to a HR trot I have seen …….

Facebookers will need to click for this animation

TIP OF THE CAP :
RENTERIA
A day after receiving more verbal internet abuse of anyone since the star wars kid Rent responded with his first homer since his dramatic game tying shot in the bottom of the 9th during the home opener…..it was also the first time team trainers were able to detect a pulse since that home opener

TORRES
Man, he did everything he could to win his like 57th gameball of the year……getting a leadoff walk in the first against the big bad Josh Johnson…..then stroking a double to center to get the Giants going in a 2 run 3rd…..and then doubling in the 5th and scoring the 3rd run of the night on Johnson…breaking a streak of 13 starts in a row that Johnson had given up 2 runs or less…..and not only did Torres' 2 Doubles tie Werth for the NL Lead in Doubles….he also became the first player to have 2 doubles off Josh Johnson this year….not just in one game…..Torres is also 4th in the National League in extra base hits ahead of players like Ryan Howard, Matt Holliday, David Wright, Ryan Braun, and MVP Candidate Joey Votto……

CAIN
Pitched like he was on a mission, challenging the strike zone and matching Johnson pitch for pitch….. lost a couple challenges to Uggla and Ross…..but, kept the Giants in the game versus a tough opponent…

ROMO
Clean 8th inning for the W……and with the Giants pen thinned down by injury, ROmo is pitching his best stretch of the year….

ROW ROW
2 more hits and scored a run ahead of Renteria's Bomb…..and you might just be seeing Rowand getting Rowand on one of those patented hot months……which is fine by me, just remember to bench him when the party is over……

HUFF
Big time double the other way to plate the Giants first run of the game…

POSEY
Knocked in Huff for the second run before getting gunned going for 2……but with 2 outs against a tough pitcher, I will take that aggressive play

SANCHEZ
Two more hits…..including the RBI single in the 5th to give the Giants a short lived lead…..

JOKER

COGHLAN

The reigning NL rookie of the year had a forgettable 2010……barely hitting his IQ in April and May, and after a hot June, had cooled again in July…….Coghlan was a Kevin Frandsen type, who because their marginal power and speed, derive their value from high contact/ average and on base skills…..…..and when those aren't showing up you are looking at a major liability in the lineup…….now slot that lack of production in an offensive position of Left Field….and its even MORE of a liability……now mix in a fired manager and a organization full of outfielders with power speed skills……and you have a player who should be worried about his job……..so when you hear about Coghlan needing knee surgery after a shaving cream pie celebration……well, chances are that Coghlan has seen his last days as a starter, and now he is likely looking at a change of organization to get another shot at a starting gig…..and for players without speed or power, that chance will be hard to come by……..not everyone is as lucky enough to get a second chance like Kevin Frandsen….

SMACK OF THE STICK :
UGGLA
2 jacks and a L……well at least he shouldn't be complaining about the HR conditions of ATT

ISHIKAWA
The only staring offensive player that wasn't on the list…..and actually snuck a ground out into the middle of that 8th inning rally

BRIAN SANCHES
What the hell???? Spell check says you're an idiot…… is that supposed to be an Americanized version of Sanchez??? hey, you are in California….speak Spanish……Pelicula con queso por favor?

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(The fine print: There will be cussing and bad taste. This is written with the heat of the moment feel you may have during the game, with rational thought sprinkled in now and then. This is entertainment folks, sure there is a lot of truth and I am a genius, but this is all about having a laugh and enjoying the ride…….now lets go heckle Jeff Kent in when he gets inducted to Cooperstown..)

by merkin

GAMEBALL and JOKER ==> MARLINS at GIANTS 07/26

2010-07-27T00:11:00.001-07:00

GAMEBALL and JOKER ==> MARLINS at GIANTS 07/26

GAMEBALL

ROWAND

What can you say, in a reserve role Rowand WAS the offense tonight coming up with a fan aided clutch 2 run fence scraper to get the Giants back in the game in the 7th, and then hit a line shot single to center after working a 2-2 count to lead off the 9th…..the biggest red ass on the team seems to have accepted his role off the bench and looks to contribute when called upon…..and he actually DID contribute going 2 for 2 in that "sub role" which was an improvement on his 2 for 12 off the bench so far this year…..and with Torres more or less firmly entrenched in the starting lineup, I am OK with Rowand getting the gameball tonight…..especially when it means I can use this one more time……

TIP OF THE CAP :
FSANCHEZ
Collected 2 hits, including a single in the 9th to set up the would be tying run at 3rd with 2 down…..

TORRES
Wasn't the best game …after a single to lead off the first got caught leaning for the Caught Stealing (rules need to be changed that make that a pickoff if you ask me) …but threw in a walk and did his best to tie the game in the 9th (damn you Gaby Sanchez)….throw in a nice play in triples alley to rob extra bases from Cody Ross and I will put him on the positive side of the ledger……

URIBE
The Box Score says he had 2 hits…..I musta been making a snack

POSEY
Only 1 hit….overrated…….

BURRELL
Worked the walk ahead of Row Row's homer, and on a full count with Uribe on 1st in the 8th with two out and down by two… swung so hard, I think I felt the breeze 50 miles away……I approve…..full count, belt high change on 3-2….guessed fastball and missed……wasn't gonna shorten up with the team in need of a tater…….

JOKER

RENTERIA

Renteria was the man at the plate to end both of the Giants late inning rallies….both times with the tying run in scoring position…..and both times….a whiff to end the innings……score 3-2 with runners on 1st and 2nd in the 7th…..and score 4-3 with runner on 3rd in the 9th……something about this guy bugs me…something about him reminds me of Livan Hernandez…he quiet emotionless demeanor just seems to come off as lethargy and just not caring..…….even in big parts of the game you hardly see emotion from him…..the only time I recall seeing a reaction for Edgar is when the benches clear and he is ready to throw down…..or when they play that Marlins walk off World Series hit from many moons ago…..HEY I got it……those damn 97 Marlins that bumped us from the damn playoffs…Livan was MVP of that series…man I think my subconscious hates Edgar……

SMACK OF THE STICK :
MOTA
Gave up the run that was the difference in the game on two belt high fastballs to Ross and Stanton…..

CANTU
Ouch…..hit iron glove was on display as he clanked a foul pop off the mitt……I don’t remember who hit it, I ain't going back on Tivo, and I didn't take notes…..

ISHIKAWA
overmatched by Nolasco and pulled for a pinch hitter when a LOOGY was brought in…..and sorry Krukow…..the term was not invented by the Giants beat writers……its been around years, and first used by Baseball Prospectus…..and I won't bother looking that up to verify…..I will let Marco correct me if I am wrong….seriously, saves me work…..

FACE PAINT CHICK
Oh boy……so yesterday I broke down how chicks don't dig body paint….well times are a changing and women these days can do all kinds of things……paint their faces…vote….drive cars…..all kinds of stuff……and Sorry $9, she didn't she didn't sport the topless upper torso paint like our friend from yesterday's GB and JK…and for that….she gets a smack…..

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(The fine print: There will be cussing and bad taste. This is written with the heat of the moment feel you may have during the game, with rational thought sprinkled in now and then. This is entertainment folks, sure there is a lot of truth and I am a genius, but this is all about having a laugh and enjoying the ride…….now lets go heckle Jeff Kent in when he gets inducted to Cooperstown..)

by merkin

GAMEBALL and JOKER ==> GIANTS at DBACKS 07/25

2010-07-26T00:13:00.001-07:00

GAMEBALL and JOKER ==> GIANTS at DBACKS 07/25

GAMEBALL

POSEY

Rookie of the Year??? Screw That… MVP……OK, maybe I'm getting a little carried away……but can you blame me…..The newest face of the franchise got off to a great start to his Giants career with a fuck load of hits and RBI's during his couple weeks in the Majors……and honestly, many of those hits were grounders finding holes really he had Woody like luck for a while…….the luck ran out and he looked to find his stride playing part time…..and then on June 30th Molina was traded to the Rangers, and the job was handed to Posey, and he has taken over….. ….a goddamn line drive machine hitting .475 with 38 hits, 7 HR, 23 RBI, and 18 Runs….and today he notched his THIRD 4 Hit game of the MONTH…..Lets put that in perspective.... …..McCovey, Cepeda, Bonds, Kent, and Will never did this…. and only 5 Giants have done this in a San Francisco Uniform….Mays (06/61, 06/58), Matt Williams (05/95), Randy Winn (09/05), Ken Henderson (08/72), and Mike Benjamin? (06/95)…and so only Cepeda had three 4 hit games so early in his career……..and as excited as we all got about Panda's year last year……he only had three 4 hits games all of last season……so keep getting exicted Giants fans, and July isn't even over yet…….and try not think about Mike Benjamin….

TIP OF THE CAP :
JON MILLER
Congrats on the induction, and so glad you like fries……but mix in a salad now and then, we would like to listen to you for years to come……

ISHIKAWA
Has taken his pinch hitting success with him into the starting lineup with hits in 9 of 11 July Starts and his 5th multi hit game in those 11 starts……..oh yeah, got the go ahead hit in extra frames today as well……

RENTERIA
Doubled and scored the tying run in the 5th…..a tie that would last into Extras…..

HUFF
Ok lets see….Posey has 32 RBI's…….8 homers, means he has knocked himself in 8 times…so that’s 32-8….24……Huff has scored 24 runs on Posey hits this year…..math doesn’t lie……

ROMO
BLEW the coverage of 1st on a leadoff grounder in the 9th…..and after a sacrifice and a single to Right…..faced 1st and 3rd with 1 out……and Romo proceeded to nut up and strike out Gillespie and Young in back to back at bats……

TIMMY
Wasn't the Dominating Timmy we are used to, giving up the big double to the opposing pitcher….but otehrwise got out of jams to go 8 strong and give the Giants a chance for the W

WILSON
Clean 9th……few more years of this, and I think you can start mentioning him in the same breath as Nen and Beck…..maybe……

FSANCHEZ
Just for that sweet little dive play in in the 2nd

JOKER

BODY PAINT

OK, I am all for showing your colors….and especially admire it in enemy territory ….but there is a limit….half naked covered in body paint is NOT BASEBALL……this ain't fucking a Chicago Bears or a Nebraska Cornhuskers game…..and even there, no one looks at Body Paint Guy and says to themselves….."wow, there goes one really cool dude"……no their thoughts are more like……"I wonder if he is retarded or drunk"…well, my friends…..the answer is usually both……and don't think the cute girls are going to be impressed…….First of all, they usually don't fuck retards…..Second, they all know drunks are more likely to pass out than actually get a woody…..and Lastly, they don't want all that paint on their sheets let alone their body…..all the way round…..Body Paint, just a bad idea……and that's my public service announcement for the day……and if I helped just one kid avoid making an ass of himself, it was all worth it…….

SMACK OF THE STICK :
NATE
OK, not sure what that was all about…..in the 10th, with the go ahead runner on 3rd and 1 out.,….Nate gets gunned …..dumb play, missed sign….don't know what that was all about…..and to add inury to insult…..teh swipe tag right to the Junk....was in line for the JOKER..if wasn't for Ishikawa and Body Paint guy…..

DBACKS
Really…..Haren who is signed through 2012 for a reasonable contract…..traded for a end of the rotation starter and a couple decent, but not spectaular minor league arms…..and not only that, the trade was announced DURING the game…..good god, way to gut punch a team and its fan base WHILE the game is going on…..
UPTON
With the go ahead run on 3rd and 1 out,.Upton got doubled off first on a line drive to end the inning….just plain inattention…….probably wondering what it would be like to play on a winner…..

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(The fine print: There will be cussing and bad taste. This is written with the heat of the moment feel you may have during the game, with rational thought sprinkled in now and then. This is entertainment folks, sure there is a lot of truth and I am a genius, but this is all about having a laugh and enjoying the ride…….now lets go heckle Jeff Kent in when he gets inducted to Cooperstown..)

by merkin

GAMEBALL and JOKER ==> GIANTS at DBACKS 07/24

2010-07-25T00:32:00.001-07:00

Good teams get fat on the weak…..I have heard that 100x, usually when we are losing to the weaker teams…..so figured I would say it when the Giants are actually getting the job done, going 9-1 in their last 10 versus teams under .500, and are a NL best 27-9 versus teams under .500……of course they have gone 5-2 versus teams above .500 during that same timeframe….well 6-1 if you ignore Cuzzi's vision impairment…..

GAMEBALL and JOKER ==> GIANTS at DBACKS 07/24

GAMEBALL

BUMGARNER

The Big Leftie keeps on dealing and tonight he breezed through 5 throwing strikes and challenging the DBacks to swing….a couple doubles a single and a bunch of strike outs……then after a solo shot in the 6th, the Giants lengthened their lead and after a Sac Fly Madison handed the game over to the pen with just 2 innings to pitch…..which was critical for a Pen missing Affeldt and Runzler, and with Romo going 30 pitches the night before……

TIP OF THE CAP :
URIBE
Chase Field plays like Coors Field Light….and with the state of the Giants pen, scoring runs and then more runs was critical…..and Uribe did the piling on tonight golfing a first pitch fastball into the left field seats for the granny

POSEY
2 MORE hits 2 walks and a RBI……and tied some guy named Cepeda on the Giants Rookie hit streak list with 17 games……and list no one has talked about since Gladden hit in 15 straight in 1984…..3 years before Buster was born…..I just made half of you feel really really old, didn't I…….

HUFF
3 hits….but the run scoring ground out in the 1st was the most critical piece…..the team that scores first, won't be shutout……that’s a fact

RENTERIA
Double in the corner to start the party…..and the box score says he had another hit, but at this point its all a blur…….

TORRESS
2 hits for the little man as well…….and a rocket to the plate to keep Young from tagging in the 1st……big play too keep the DBacks off the board in their best threat of the first 6 innings……when it was still close……

ROWAND
Didn't do shit at the plate, as usual…..but ran down a couple shots deep in center that looked like they were gonna fall……not the fastest guy on the field, but good instincts and sure hands……

JOKER

ROCKIES

The Rockies are the team that most people were looking to as the West favorite….and when they are hitting on all cylinders, they are a legitimate World Series threat……but so far this year, they have been a 1 cylinder engine going 16-4 when Ubaldo starts and 35-41 in all other games……Hammel, Cook, Francis, Smith, and de la Rosa all sport ERA's above the league average with only Chacin just a hair better than average…..So the Rockies owe most of this season success to Ubaldo…..garnering not only Cy Young talk, but even perhaps an MVP…..and rightly so as he has been nearly untouchable in 2010….but things have turned and in five of his last six starts he has been touched more than Macaulay Culkin on a long weekend at Neverland ….and today his 2 innings was matched his career shortest outing from 2007 when he was just getting his feet on the ground…..but don't count Ubaldo out quite yet, as he is still throwing as hard as ever and throwing strikes…..but lets hope it takes him a little while to get straightened out….

SMACK OF THE STICK :
LIFE
Man, always full of bummers…..Velez's unfortunate incident is a good example…..I hear the damage is only a concussion….."ONLY" only applies if its not your head…..ouch…….glad to hear you are otherwise ok…….

PABLO
I don't know any details, and shouldn't pass judgement on people…..then again, that never stopped me before…..sounds like Pablo hit the big time, and decided to upgrade to a new woman……too bad the old woman didn't like being the trade in model…..good luck in Venezuela……and hope its just a simple case of love gone wrong…..

GIBSON
score is 7-2…..7th inning…and you ARE PLAYING THE INFIELD IN????? yeah gotta hold it to 5 runs, cause its hard to come back from 6 down……dumbass…..single past the drawn in infield and a few batters later its 10-2…….

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GB and JK ARCHIVES AT THE GIANTS BOARD BLOG

(The fine print: There will be cussing and bad taste. This is written with the heat of the moment feel you may have during the game, with rational thought sprinkled in now and then. This is entertainment folks, sure there is a lot of truth and I am a genius, but this is all about having a laugh and enjoying the ride…….now lets go heckle Jeff Kent in when he gets inducted to Cooperstown..)

by merkin

GAMEBALL and JOKER ==> GIANTS at DBACKS 07/23

2010-07-24T00:10:00.001-07:00

Loooong day at the office…..that really isn't over yet as team India is working on the servers……forgive me if this is a bit short and tired……

GAMEBALL and JOKER ==> GIANTS at DBACKS 07/23

GAMEBALL

HUFF

Freaking Huff picked a great place to go nutz…..with 2 solo shots setting the tone for the Giants offense……very often losing out a free agent turns into a good thing….losing out on Juan Pierre and Gary Mathews are two that jump out in recent memory…..of course neither of them worked out quite as well as losing out on LaRoche……as Mr Second choice has been trouncing LaRoches production, and guess which one is on a winner…..and sure LaRoche's wallet is a little heavier……but not only did LaRoche lose out on a bigger payday with the G Men…..he is basically watching Huff work his way into at least the same offer from the Giants this offseason…..sure Aubrey might be tempted to mention that to LaRoche….but he was too busy running around the bases to stop and chat……

And, although this was a work in progress from the other day, think its good enough to share on its own…and after a night like tonight, he deserves it……

TIP OF THE CAP :
TORRES
Hits Ball, Catch Ball, Run Fast

ISHIKAWA
Could be following in Torres footsteps… well, maybe a few years earlier…..

PABLO
Well, even when he only get 1 hit, he doesn't look nearly as lost up there……

WILSON
Ain't always pretty, but he is having a solid solid year……

JOKER

E JACKSON

Edwin Jackson the Dodger Phenom…..made his major league debut on his 20th birthday beating the Dbacks…..that same year Felipe Alou guided the Giants to 100 wins, Tim Worrell had 38 saves, Joe Nathan had 12 wins out of the Pen, and Brian Sabean won executive of the year from the Sporting News and Baseball America…..seems like a lifetime ago…….in that time Edwin has gone from Phenom, to Scrub, to Journeyman, and now the Tease…..yes, that 2009 Campaign was a career year and Edwin brought great expectations to the desert as a major part of the rotation…..too bad he didn't bring composure with him, as he airmailed BACK to BACK bunts in the 7th, giving back the lead he was just handed and ultimately losing the game…..

SMACK OF THE STICK :
CASILLA
Soooo nasty……soooooo scary…….I guess the 6th inning is the perfect spot for him……but even there……

JSANCHEZ
Same old Jonathan…..and perhaps even a little exaggerated tonight with his 5 walks and 10 k's and 109 pitches over 5 innings……man, I think this is good as it gets…….but with pitchers…..hell, they can figure it out anytime……I was hoping for Teddy Higuera….thinking it maybe Sid Fernandez……but I am afraid he may never be better than Oliver Perez…….

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(The fine print: There will be cussing and bad taste. This is written with the heat of the moment feel you may have during the game, with rational thought sprinkled in now and then. This is entertainment folks, sure there is a lot of truth and I am a genius, but this is all about having a laugh and enjoying the ride…….now lets go heckle Jeff Kent in when he gets inducted to Cooperstown..)

by merkin

GAMEBALL and JOKER ==> GIANTS at DBACKS 07/22

2010-07-22T23:26:00.001-07:00

GAMEBALL and JOKER ==> GIANTS at DBACKS 07/22

GAMEBALL

CAIN

Who needs offense when you throw a mound ace out there every night? Well, the Giants in the desert only managed a 3 spot but that was MORE than enough for Matt….going 8 solid allowing 3 hits and 3 walks….were they all to Upton??? seems like it……mixing a low to mid 90's heater with Changeups Sliders and Curves, throwing everything for strikes……Matt looks like he has caught a second wind with his second dominant start coming out of the break …and this time he mixed in 9 K's in 8 innings to help appease the Voros BABIP crowd…..so good work Matty and keep it rolling

TIP OF THE CAP :
TORRES
One of the big difference makers in 2010….and tonight he did it with the bat hitting turning around an offspeed pitch off Rodrigo Lopez over the Los Dbacks sign (Merkin refrains from injecting political commentary here) in Right Center….and then just a 1/2 innings later he stole extra bases from Chris Young…..

HUFF
After giving the Ump some entertaining body language in the first, Huff walked on 6 balls….and the proceeded to do pull a sneaky steal of 2nd…..and come around to score the first run of the game…….

POSEY
2 more hits for the newest Phenom for the Giants, including a 2 out single in the first to plate the Giants first run……yes, we have said a Right Handed Will Clark……but I will go one further…..give him some time, and a little bulk……and I am thinking Albert Pujols….without the juice, of course…Am I crazy? Perhaps, but it had to be said……

URIBE
2 hits including a double and run scored in the 7th…..

ROWAND
Singled in Uribe, and then swiped a base perhaps more entertaining than Huff's

JOKER

MLBPA

You have probably noticed that I have made some items on the Cafepress site mostly to promote the site, and provide items that would not normally be available to Giants Fans…..Sure I have pushed the envelope of what may be considered acceptable……Now I can tell you I have been my own best customer, buying items and giving them away to help promote the site, and really just cause I can……Now I can assure you I have not made a dime off the Giants or the Giants players……this site COSTS money and TIME to run and the promotion I have done for the site has also COST me money…..so when I get an email from Cafepress telling me that they have been contacted by the MLBPA about some of the items I had listed and they were being taken down……well, I understand they are completely within their rights……but I still think its bullshit …..of all the things to be concerned about, they are worried because I have sold 10 fucking shirts, and then taken whatever proceeds to buy more stuff to give away…..right now I have a bunch of buttons I just printed up, and I can tell you that I plan on giving them ALL away, and probably buying some more…..this is HURTING their bottom line? Fuck they probably paid that lawyer more for 20 minutes of work than any revenue I could have cost them…..all this while people stand outside of ballpark hawking counterfeit merchandise for profit to an audience larger than I could ever hope to sell to……not to mention all the shit on Ebay are obviously for profit…...its all fucking bullshit if you ask me……what's next, a lawsuit? ….. yeah, take my fucking house that is $100K underwater and all my money…..maybe then I could give up my season tickets and the money I spend on Giants shit all year long…Yes, you are completely within your rights, and you WIN…fucking jackasses

SMACK OF THE STICK :
PABLO
You have heard that baseball is a game of adjustment, and you can see it in action if you just watch a few at bats from Pablo a night…….the high fastball was the weakness……and he finally started to lay off the pitches that were too high to hit, and punishing the ones he could get to……so what happened……a steady diet of curveballs …..with a good number of them in the dirt……now it looks like he started taking more curves and forcing pitchers to throw them for strikes……so what does he see…..Curveballs in the dirt…..Curveballs in the zone…..Fastballs high……he is doing the best he can to adjust, but he's having a hard time trying to lay off the Curveball down and Fastball up…..At this point I don't think he is going to see anything hard for a strike….so sit back, and think Curve and go the other way…..let it get it deep on you so you can see where its going…….and don't even think Fastball until 2 strike protect mode……easier said than done……

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GB and JK ARCHIVES AT THE GIANTS BOARD BLOG

(The fine print: There will be cussing and bad taste. This is written with the heat of the moment feel you may have during the game, with rational thought sprinkled in now and then. This is entertainment folks, sure there is a lot of truth and I am a genius, but this is all about having a laugh and enjoying the ride…….now lets go heckle Jeff Kent in when he gets inducted to Cooperstown..)

by merkin

GAMEBALL and JOKER ==> GIANTS at DODGERS 07-21

2010-07-22T00:22:00.000-07:00

With Dodgertown reeling from the embarrassing loss on top of a losing streak, today was the perfect day to twist that knife into the Dodgers gut…..all the elements were there….a Fan Friendly lineup (ie no Rowand or Rent) a struggling Billingsly on the mound in front of a battered Dodger bullpen all being managed by MattingLOL (tm Baggs)….instead we got 9 innings worth of blah……Both teams played without incident, which probably did wonders for the Dodgers as they focused on the game rather than their Machismo

GAMEBALL and JOKER ==> GIANTS at DODGERS 07-21

GAMEBALL

ZITO

Barry did just about all we could ask, pitching well enough to keep the Giants in the game versus a still potent Dodger lineup…he was a little shaky in the 2nd allowing a Blake homer, and the back to back singles before getting a comebacker Double Play to end the innings….he then breezed through the Dodger order for 3rd-7th innings, without allowing a Dodger runner past 1st base…..but then in the 8th after a leadoff single, a sac bunt and walk, he left the game swearing at no one in particular like a crazy homeless man on Market street….without the urine stench or cardboard Vietnam vet sign…..so, despite being tagged with the L, Zito turned in a solid performance, and the fire that has been indicative of the good Zito…..errr, I mean less sucky Zito…….

TIP OF THE CAP :
GIANTS FANS IN LA
I don't know how you do it….I just plain fucking hate LA and that goddamn stadium…..the sprawling concrete with little vegetation, the traffic seemingly on every street and at most hours of the day…..the people, who are more conscious of how much money you make and what you drive than who you are…..and then there is Dodger Stadium and Dodger Fans…..you don't really notice the smog unless….you look at the horizon……you are landing or taking off in a plane……you go to Dodger stadium……and man, when the heat starts to rise in the Summer and you get that inversion layer compounded by the Ravine compounded by the Stadium…..well, you get a big bowl of smog…..and you can not only see it as you look across the field,….you can feel it…..with the sun and the alcohol and the microscopic dirt clinging to your body as Dodger fans display what happens when you dilute the gene pool……it all makes me feel like Travis Bickle praying for a real rain…..perhaps a rain of 10 % bleach would do the trick

NATE
1 for 2 with a walk in 3 PA's…..really the only bat that didn't squander an opportunity of some sort …

JOKER

BATS

Shut down, and held to 5 hits….but they never seemed overmatched by Billingsly, getting chance after chance to tie the game but coming up short…..0-8 with runners in scoring position, including 0-4 from Sandoval and Uribe, but you cant hang it on those two as Torres and Posey and Sanchez had their chances as well….The Giants only struck out 3 times, and did not strike out at all with runners on base…not only that they didn't hit into any DP's and didn’t really make any blunders……but in the end, they couldn't find any holes, and only a handful of hard hit balls…..but still it was the kind of game where you felt like you were hitting……but still manage to put a big fat goose egg up on the scoreboard…..

SMACK OF THE STICK :
UMPS
Looks like you fucked up last night too, at least it was to our benefit……

ROMO
After getting Kemp, gave up a humpback liner to Blake to hand a 2nd Earnie on Zito

TASCHNER
What a man will do to collect a big league check…..yes, he is a officially a fucking Dodger…..whats the matter Colleti,. Felix Rodriguez not available?

So, that’s it for the Dodgers for now, as today felt like a letdown game…..but the Giants travel to the Desert where they have hit well recently…so I don't expect a hangover from this emotional series……and they can afford to, as the DBacks pitching can be taken advantage of and despite a managerial change they are still blowing chunks with Gibson 6-10….and the Giants get a little lucky too, missing the Ace in Haren by a day, and facing that bullpen, which is not only historically bad, but pitched 13 innings in 5 days including 8 innings in a game that just ended…..

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GB and JK ARCHIVES AT THE GIANTS BOARD BLOG

(The fine print: There will be cussing and bad taste. This is written with the heat of the moment feel you may have during the game, with rational thought sprinkled in now and then. This is entertainment folks, sure there is a lot of truth and I am a genius, but this is all about having a laugh and enjoying the ride…….now lets go heckle Jeff Kent in when he gets inducted to Cooperstown..)

by merkin

GAMEBALL and JOKER ==> GIANTS at DODGERS 06-20

2010-07-21T00:29:00.000-07:00

PERFECT….Just Fucking PERFECT…..I couldn't dream of a better way of winning in LA than what happened tonight…..for all the bullshit meltdowns we have dealt with the last 6 years starting with the Ransom Boot, to being swept at home to end the season, to Ellison letting one roll to the wall, to Hennesey tossing a pick off into center field…..to Romo's gopherball this year....the Giants have found a way to lose to the men in blue over and over again, and usually in the most embarrassing fashion…..but none of the meltdowns the Giants have had over the years was as completely stupid and embarrassing as what those fucking blue ass clowns did to themselves tonight…..yes, this was the perfect win……a game we did not deserve, but won because the Dodgers just plain fucking SUCK…….

GAMEBALL and JOKER ==> GIANTS at DODGERS 06-20

GAMEBALL

TORRES

Well the opportunities presented were just opportunities…..and ANDRES CASHED HIS IN BIG TIME with a ringing double into the gap to plate the tying and go ahead runs…..you gotta love this shit…..jumping on a belt high fastball down the plate to deal the game winning blow….for his only hit of the game…add to that hit, gunning of a freshly bruised Kemp trying to go to third…man, nothing should piss off a hit batter more than getting gunned down on the bases…....hope you are all believers by now, he can hit, he can catch, he can throw and Andres don't look like he is stopping anytime soon…..just keep it rolling Andres, keep it rolling into October…….

TIP OF THE CAP :
BOCHY
Rarely does a manager get this much love, but sorry….I can't give a gameball for that…..big sure, but Torres was the one that came through…..with Torres' swinging a hot bat and Broxton cold as of late, you can't say that Torres wouldn't have come through either way...but on top of that I do have Bochy credit for getting 3 1/3 while tempting fate with Casilla and Bautista, and then sticking with Affeldt in the 9th with Romo warm…..

PANDA
Well, another game in the books, and another walk and came around to score the Giants 1st run and then he laced a shot down the left field line for a big 2 out 2 run double in the 6th to bring the Giants with within 1……

AFFELDT
Was the man again tonight, coming in for the save getting Ethier to K as the tying run at the plate

POSEY
Singled in the insurance run, and singled as part of the 3 run rally in the 6th….

BAUTSITA/ CASILLA
Neither was in control, but when you look up at the score board……They Did Their Job…

URIBE
Couple singles, including legging out an infield hit to start the 9th……he's a lot faster than he looks when he needs to be……sure Furcal had to charge and field it in the hole, but with his gun, I thought he had a shot…..I was wrong, it wasn't even close…….

ROWAND
Laid one down and took one in the ass……oh yeah, he also had a good bunt and hit by pitch…..

LINCECUM
Not really sure where to put him…..probably in line for the smack of the stick…..but the way things turned out, and for being the one on the Giants who FINALLY had the balls get some fucking revenge…..well, tip of the cap to you little man

JOKER

MATTINGLY

Managers have few ways to affect the outcome of the game…..the roster and the game decide most of the moves in the game, and honestly there are more ways for a manager to LOSE the game than win……and Donnie Baseball showed us a new one tonight…and not only did he completely blow it with a "Manager Balk"….. but when the Umpires called him out, he stood there like a 8 year old girl being scolded…..he coulda thrown a tantrum and gotten tossed and bought time for the pen to get ready, instead he let Blake be the vet on the field and do the arguing for him……as it stood, Sherrill barely had time to finish his Wal Mart job application before coming into the game

SMACK OF THE STICK :
TORRE
The whole bean ball thing took over the game…..after Lincecum hit Kemp and both benches got warned, it seemed the Dodgers were more concerned with getting ahead in the HBP department then winning the game…..and furthermore, how the hell is Mattingly in line to manage…..after warnings were issued and the bench coach was ejected, the #3 guy actually having to manage became a very real responsibility…with the game on the line Bowa has to be in charge, sure Mattingly is your guy and you want to groom him to follow in your footsteps…..but when Mattingly thinks turn those footsteps into a pitching mound polka…..well, you are a jackass

KERSHAW
With the state of the Dodgers bullpen and starting staff, you are counting on big innings from your ace…..but Kershaw decided it was more important to get ahead in the HBP war and put the tying run on base to lead off the 7th, after only 6 innings…..yes, the pitch count was up to 103, but Kershaw coulda easily finished 7 innings, and handed the Dodgers pen a lead with 2 innings to go instead of 3…..and that coulda been huge…..

PAUL
And of course, none of this woulda been possible without our Rookie Manny replacement, doing his best Manny imitation out there in left……perhaps thinking the Burrell's ball was gone, let it hit off his glove to set up Sandoval's 2 run double……

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(The fine print: There will be cussing and bad taste. This is written with the heat of the moment feel you may have during the game, with rational thought sprinkled in now and then. This is entertainment folks, sure there is a lot of truth and I am a genius, but this is all about having a laugh and enjoying the ride…….now lets go heckle Jeff Kent in when he gets inducted to Cooperstown..)

by merkin

c

GAMEBALL and JOKER ==> GIANTS at DODGERS 07/19

2010-07-20T00:27:00.000-07:00

Why in the hell do I watch this shit….this isn't fun, this is exactly as Kuiper described……sweating palms, sinking feeling in my stomach…..man, I can't handle this ….but when the high flying circus act is done I look up and the scoreboard and we won……man, the way the Giants played I feel like we lost…… sloppy sloppy play…5 walks, gaffes in the field and on the bases and we still got the W……man, if they played like they should, this wouldn't have been a contest……But instead of putting on their game faces and playing focused championship ball, the Giants backed into the win relying on Houdini acts inning after inning…..the Giants are lucky that the Dodgers are cold, cause they played like shit…..some one needs to take hold of this locker room and give them some focus…..they play like they are all playing their first goddamn game in the majors……Your rival should bring out YOUR BEST, not this shitty brand of ball they have played…. I don't know what's going to shake them, but they sorely need some confidence against the Dodgers……and I don't care how many times you beat LA, if you play like you did tonight, you are still going to play tight sloppy ball….

GAMEBALL and JOKER ==> GIANTS at DODGERS 07/19

GAMEBALL

AFFELDT

Well someone had some fire and announced his presence with authority……Thrown into the fire …nursing a shirnking lead with the bases juiced to perhaps the most clutchy active player in the NL…..and with zero room for error, he stemmed the time getting Ethier to bounce out to end the threat…..and then came back out for the 8th and got the ball to the closer only giving up a 2 out bouncing single to Kemp….and in my favorite at bat of the night, just plain broke down Loney on a curveball for strike three….and as Loney walks back to the dugout, he glares at the mound looking pissed off at Affeldt for throwing something so nasty…..

TIP OF THE CAP :
NATE
The BOMB that extended the lead in the 4th was huge, lets hope the bench did for him, what it did for Ishikawa

BUMGARNER
The youngster in enemy territory had ice water in his veins….kept the Dodgers in check for 5 innings, but fell victim to the pitch count and was pulled in the 6th……but you know he woulda loved to stay out there for 200 pitches…..

WILSON
On a night where nothing was easy, why would Wilson be any different…..with a little help from a moving strike zone, alternated base runners with strike outs for the bases loaded save…….

PABLO
BIG double to score the games second run, and speared every line drive in a 4 block radius….

TORRES
Doubled and scored the Giants first run of the night

SANCHEZ
Got the ball in the air this time, and converted a BIG insurance run in the 8th…..

ISHIKAWA
Got on base ahead of Nat's Bomb, and walked and scored to lead off the 8th….

POSEY
Single to plate the first run of the game, and made the heady play getting on the umps to end the 8th on Belliard's swing and miss…..

JOKER

ROMO

Romo is no stranger to the Dodgers…..his bomb to Manny from early in the year is a staple of Dodgers television, working its way into highlight reels and commercials and the like…..so I am sure the Dodgers were salivating at the prospect of facing Romo again with the game on the line…..and he didn't disappoint…..turning a 2 out and man on first, into based loaded and the Dodgers "Captain Clutch" come to the plate…..INEXCUSABLE….how the FUCK do you walk JAMEY FREAKING CARROLL to load the bases???? and not only that, but on 4 straight pitches…..the game was over right there……just handed to the Dodgers on a silver plater……I walked away from the TV, feeling as if Romo had just screwed my girlfriend and kicked my dog……or maybe kicked my girlfriend and screwed my dog……whatever, that doesn't matter….all I know is that Romo's stuff isn't good enough to get by without control……and I don't even mean throwing strikes…he has to LOCATE his pitches…..and good god, how can he LOCATE his pitches, when he barely knows where homeplate is……sorry, but until Romo gets it worked out, and/ or Runzler comes back, the bullpen is now the weak link…….

SMACK OF THE STICK :
PABLO
And on the other side of the ledger, made one of the biggest boneheads of the night going for the tag instead of the force, handing the Dodgers a run…..yes, the run shouldn't have scored, but Loney coulda easily started a rundown…..and sorry, the throw to first is more of a sure thing than ANY rundown……you see that play a fucking billion times, and a billion times the infielder throws the ball to first, like they are supposed to…..well, I guess Pablo found out why tonight…..

TORRES
Taking a page from the bonehead playbook, Torres forgot how many out there were in the 8th, getting doubled off first and ending a prime opportunity to put the Dodgers away….

FUCKING UMPIRES
Well, that strike zone wasn't as bad a Cuzzi, but it was moving big time…..to the benefit/ detriment of both teams……but the in the daily screw the Giants call of the day, they gave the Dodgers their second run on the tag play……good god, are any if these idiots paying attention????? are the just tired??? man, these umps are fucking killing us…lets just hope that Good Old Frank Robinson cracks some skulls….

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(The fine print: There will be cussing and bad taste. This is written with the heat of the moment feel you may have during the game, with rational thought sprinkled in now and then. This is entertainment folks, sure there is a lot of truth and I am a genius, but this is all about having a laugh and enjoying the ride…….now lets go heckle Jeff Kent in when he gets inducted to Cooperstown..)

by merkin

GAMEBALL and JOKER ==> METS at GIANTS 07/18

2010-07-19T00:26:00.001-07:00

GAMEBALL and JOKER ==> METS at GIANTS 07/18

GAMEBALL

ISHIKAWA

Playing time has been hard to come by, but Travis has made the most of it when he is in there……and today, in a clutch pinch hit at bat he laced a 2-2 fastball to center to to plate 2 runs to tie the game, and then game around to score the run that beat the Mets in the 9th……just a few months ago Ishikawa was an afterthought, a useless part, a vestigial organ like the Appendix of the Human, the Wings on an Ostrich or Eyes on an Umpire….Good job bringing home the victory…….

TIP OF THE CAP :
TORRES
Big double set up the winning run in the 9th…..

JSANCHEZ
Pitched erratically, but well enough to keep the Mets in check and give the Giants a chance to win

URIBE
missed some early chances, but came up with a big single in the 9th inning rally

PANDA
Yes, good news is that he IS looking very good all of a sudden…..and took 2 walks today including a BIG BIG walk to start the 9th……maybe the stories of working with his brother during the all star break is more than just a fluff piece……

JOKER

CUZZI

Man, this guy is a fucking clown…….the ever shifting strike zone was pissing both teams off…..expanding the zone early in the count and then tightening it up late in the count……and then as tempers got heated, he let the emotion of the game cloud his tiny fucking brain, blowing an OBVIOUS call…..I mean come on, you don't get calls easier than that……I assume you know where the plate is……all you have to do is watch the glove and the tag…..and if you WERE watching the glove and the tag you woulda seen that not only did Ishkawa TOUCH the plate, his foot was PAST the plate……and yes the Giants won 3 out of 4, but that has nothing to do with it…..the Giants battled and came back and won this fucking game……and its bigger than just one game……it’s a L instead of a W…..and its about momentum into a HUGE series in Los Angeles…..Fucking Umpires NEED to be held accountable……dock their pay for missing big calls, or something……they just go back to the clubhouse and call it a bad day and move on, while the teams involved live with the consequences of their mistakes……and umpires like Cuzzi, who have a history of blowing calls under pressure need to be sent to AAA, just like a player who fails…….but what can you expect from an idiot like Cuzzi, its genetic……here is a photo taken with his two brothers……no, that’s not Larry Baer on the right……

SMACK OF THE STICK :
WILSON
After getting Davis 1-2, he threw 3 straight slider things, and the last one was belt high…..and by that time Davis had a real good look at that pitch…….the fucking tard was overthinking it……don’t throw that shit back to back, it AINT that good……you reach back and throw hard and then do it again, then mix in the slider…..you don’t feature the fucking slider…..jackass

SABEAN
13 pitchers coming off 3 off days……yeah, that’s bright….and after your starters AVERAGED 8 innings over the last three games, that looks even brighter…..and then with the roster hamstrung, and you can't pinch hit in a crucial spot in the 10…..well, you are the jackass…….tell me you wouldn't rather have Bowker hit in Whitesides spot in the 10th….or have Nate hit with Bowker on deck to force them to pitch to Nate……either way…..fucking stupid….

BOCHY
OK, how the FUCK do you NOT get thrown out of that game…..good god, even Felipe Alou woulda woken from his perpetual coma and gotten run there…..let the fucking UMP HAVE IT…EMBARRASS HIM OUT THERE…..its the only reprimand an ump will get…. ..so show some passion and some fight…..if not for your team, for the fans……

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(The fine print: There will be cussing and bad taste. This is written with the heat of the moment feel you may have during the game, with rational thought sprinkled in now and then. This is entertainment folks, sure there is a lot of truth and I am a genius, but this is all about having a laugh and enjoying the ride…….now lets go heckle Jeff Kent in when he gets inducted to Cooperstown..)

by merkin

GAMEBALL and JOKER ==> METS at GIANTS 07/16

2010-07-17T00:11:00.001-07:00

A day after a late run made a 1-0 into a 2-0 victory, the Giants finally broke through with a 1 run win……and I mean a win with pitching pitching pitching…… this team was built to win 1-0, 2-1, and 2-0 and like I said yesterday uwe did not have a single 1-0 victory until tonight….……the kind that harkens back to the days of Gibson, Marichal, and Koufax……the Giants are now 3-6 in games that ended with 1-0, 2-0, and 2-1…. for comparisons sake the Padres are 9-3 in those same type of games……I will leave that stat up to you for interpretation……

GAMEBALL and JOKER ==> METS at GIANTS 07/16

GAMEBALL

ZITO

Man, what the fuck was that all about…..after an early exit in his last turn, Barry comes up LARGE with 8 shutout innings with 10 strikeouts…..and if not the walk to Turner with 2 out in the 8th he might have stayed in for the duration…..It was his best start of the year, and the second time he has gone 8 scoreless and hit the 10 K mark this year….The only two games he has gone 8 with 10K's in a Giants uniform was this year, and before this year, he only hit double digit strikeouts once since donning the French Vanilla……man, that was just fucking filthy…..I don't know how much of it was the Mets sucking, the Ump giving calls, or Zito dealing……but I tell you one thing…..you don't have a game like that without kicking some serious ass…….to put this into a little perspective lets look at the Bill James game score…. Tonight's start was an 86, the ONLY start in his career that was higher was August 20, 2001 vs the Indians….where he notched a 88 in a 4 hit shutout….maybe I am wrong and maybe that ace we saw in April is still alive somewhere in there…maybe he did come out of the all star break fresh and recharged….… or maybe he has a new pre game meal whatever it is……I would be the happiest wrongest man on the planet if that turns out to be true…..

TIP OF THE CAP :
HUFF
3 singles and a walk…..and scored the lone run……and much like Huff it wasn’t the prettiest collection of hits…..and neither was the dash home as he looked more like a beer league softball player about to blow out a hammy after having a few too many and pushing that old body a little too hard…..well, it turned out to be the only run of the game, and was good for the W…..

WILSON
came in, got two quick outs before a single and an umpire aided 3-1 call…..hey, the zone was wide for both teams…..and a Save means we Won……

POSEY
After bouncing into a DP with a runner on 3rd, he set up another runner at 3rd with less than two out…..and this time he scored……

BURRELL
Lost a pop up in the lights, but had the game winning groundout??? Hey, you take what you can get…..and when you don’t give UP anything, you don’t have to get much……

JOKER

TORRES

Hard to get two down on this team, despite the lack of offensive production……but of all the candidate for Joker, it has to be Torres…..back in the lineup was nice to see, but pulling in a 0 fer 4 with 2 K's versus the Leftie leaves to door open to a possible platoon…….good to see him healthy, but when you are a too old to be a prospect, and have no major league track record to speak of, the leash is short….you need to stay healthy and stay hitting, or you might get displaced by an overpaid jackass…..or worse yet, Sabean could see it as a need and overpay for someone like David DeJesus……..so get it in gear Andres……we don't want to see the alternative…..

SMACK OF THE STICK :
FSANCHEZ
Right after I start singing your praises, you go missing……just the flu?...ok, I will cut him some slack….unless Flu is code for Knee or Shoulder…..wouldn't be the first time the Giant org misled us…..

PABLO
Wasn't even in the lineup versus the leftie….and didn't really do much to earn more time with 1 hit 4 AB's with a total of 9 Pitches……

URIBE
Just as hacky as Pablo taking the 0 fer…..

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(The fine print: There will be cussing and bad taste. This is written with the heat of the moment feel you may have during the game, with rational thought sprinkled in now and then. This is entertainment folks, sure there is a lot of truth and I am a genius, but this is all about having a laugh and enjoying the ride…….now lets go heckle Jeff Kent in when he gets inducted to Cooperstown..)

by merkin

GAMEBALL and JOKER ==> METS at GIANTS 07/15

2010-07-15T23:47:00.001-07:00

So baseball is back…..but that was weird……almost a ho hum game, with both offenses not doing much with the bat…….that sucker sailed past, ....innings just flying by…..and in the end…..222 total pitches from both staffs…….and a 2-0 victory……now these are the kinds of games we should be playing…….pitching pitching pitching……but this was only the 3rd victory from the Giants scoring 2 runs or less…..the other two….a 2-0 shutout on 04/24 vs the Cards and a 2-1 victory vs the Astros on 05/15……
and for the record the Giants have not won 1-0 all year, and are 0-16 when scoring less than 2……

GAMEBALL and JOKER ==> METS at GIANTS 07/15

GAMEBALL

TIMMY

Now that’s what I am talking about…..Timmy coasted through 9 shutout innings for his 10th win…..really there were only a couple threats…..in the 1st David Wright lost his challenge to ATT's Center Field wall in the first, and in the 5th the Mets got the first 2 men aboard……the stat line looked nice and neat with just the 1 walk, but something felt a little strange…..despite having all 3 pitches working, this wasn't the dominant high strikeout game……and no, the lack of strikeouts had nothing to do with velocity, as he was hitting 92-93 all night…..more of a function of the Mets trying to stay out of deep counts…….and if that gets you 9 quick and clean shutout innings….I will take that any day……heck throw in a leadoff single and some hustle in the 9th….and Timmy has got a gameball

TIP OF THE CAP :
PABLO
Crushed a double off the wall to plate an early run…..and that woulda been a homer is pretty much any other park…a couple more hard hit outs, and nice play on a foul ball and solid defense…..and you can smile about the Panda tonight

POSEY
Singled to scored the first run of the night…..and then knocked in the second run…….and of course he gunned down Betran trying to steal in the 4th

ROWAND
Pair of infield singles…..and the hustle play to beat the force at home in the 9th to give Timmy a little cushion…..

SANCHEZ
Man, this guy has much more range than I expected…..age and knees and all….he's got the fucking Inspector Gadget extendo arm in both directions……almost getting Tejada on a ball up the middle in the 3rd and then behind 1st to get Davis to end the game….

JOKER

MINAYA Mets GM

So this is what $126 Million will buy these days? Santana, Beltran, Reyes, Wright, K Rod, Bay…..man, they got their own all star team....but looks like getting production out of these guys is a 50/50 proposition….and with Beltran getting surgery on his own, and then letting the team know……and Reyes strange thyroid affliction, and then Wright questioning Reyes' health and judgement……who the hell is running the show???? Good god, add that list of players to some of the nice homegrown talent like Ike Davis, Angel Pagan, Mike Pelfry, Jon Niese…..and this is the kinda team that just needs to stay motivated and get a few solid role players to round out the roster…..instead they are basically just drifting sideways, with the exception of a nice 8 game streak in June…… right in the hunt for the division……but with little bullpen, and mismatched underachieving roster…..another September implosion awaits……..

SMACK OF THE STICK :
MANUEL
The 5th inning…..down 1-0 in what looks like it will be a 1 run game……1st and 3rd and 1 out with the pitcher at the plate…….and you bunt…….WHAT THE FUCK?????......ok sure it’s the pitcher, but he IS hitting ..333 career with 7 hits in 21 at bats……and the chances of a chopper or a weak grounder or a flyball to score the run well outweighs the chance of the Double Play…..yes Pagan has been a hell of an RBI man, but with a runner on third with decent speed in Bay, you gotta take a chance…..Hell, if you are THAT worried about the DP….do the damn suicide squeeze in that position…..cause if it works , you get a run…..if it doesn't, the runner on 1st moves into scoring position with 2 out and you still give Pagan a chance…..dumbass…..

NATE
Has gotten the last three starts out there, and done nothing to really impress…..

BURRELL
I know it's only 2 games on the bench, but I don't like the trend here……

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(The fine print: There will be cussing and bad taste. This is written with the heat of the moment feel you may have during the game, with rational thought sprinkled in now and then. This is entertainment folks, sure there is a lot of truth and I am a genius, but this is all about having a laugh and enjoying the ride…….now lets go heckle Jeff Kent in when he gets inducted to Cooperstown..)

by merkin

GAMEBALL and JOKER ==> GIANTS at NATIONALS 07/11

2010-07-11T23:11:00.001-07:00

GAMEBALL and JOKER ==> GIANTS at NATIONALS 07/11

GAMEBALL

BUMGARNER

Man, this kid is looking good….just a few months removed from talk about how he was likely hurt and a waste of a pick, he has turned that story around with a strong follow up to his best career start……I have a hard time believing what I am seeing…..low 90's with movement from a low 3/4rs extreme leftie angle from the left side of the rubber…looks like he is out of control, but when you look up……well, he's a strike thrower with 0 walks on the day and a total of 8 walks and 31 K's in 38 career innings…..that's less that 2 walks per 9, and over 7 K's per 9…..so he throws strikes and don't walk people…..yes, and he is also a GROUNDBALL pitcher, as evidenced today with two well timed Double Play balls to snuff would be Rallies in the 1st and 2nd and get him setlled in……his Ground Out/ Fly Out ratio is just about 1.00 in the bigs this year, but he has a career minor league ratio of 1.23 and a ridiculous ratio of 1.60 in Fresno this year……which is critical, cause when you look at Madison, the one thing we HAVE seen in the bigs so far is coughing up the big homer…..keep it on the ground, keep the walks to a minimum, and punch out a decent amount, and you got yourself something special……and the kid can't even buy a beer for another month……hell, he's so young he doesn't even know who Francisco Liriano is…..and maybe he can make me forget…….

TIP OF THE CAP :
ISHIKAWA
Tough pass on Ishi…..came up with the big single to get the early jump on Livan….but I don't feel so bad, cause the way things are playing out, I think Travis might win a few more gameballs before the year is through…..

POSEY
I think this says it all

FSANCHEZ
Sac bunt in the first…..may have seemed strange, especially since he 4 for 10 lifetime versus Livan…..but he knows just like we do…..believe in Buster and he will set you free…..

WILSON
The man who drives us nuts, has turned into Mr Ace in the Hole of late……

ROMO
Great sequence to get Willingham……but that second slider to IRod was a location mistake across the belt and IRod had it timed…..and a little juice to that swing and its long gone…..

HUFF
All he does is score runs……

URIBE
Got the 2 out base hit for insurance and a change of momentum in the 8th

ZACK WHEELER
Nice inning for the kid…..and I do mean kid……95-96 on the gun…..what the heck is he dong in the futures game anyway? 8 career pro games…..well, he didn't embarrass himself….

FRANCISCO PEGUERO
1 for 2 against much more advanced competion….

JOKER

PABLO

Been a year since Pablo was an All Star Snub, and his second half last year was even better than the first as he found his power stroke and was working counts while maintaining his ridiculous batting prowess …..Alongside Timmy, he became the face of the Giants with Camp Panda in the news all offseason, his own bobblehead day, commercial spots, and thousands of Panda Hats sold…….here was the budding star spraying the ball around the field picking it at 3rd and bouncing around the dugout…..well, today is was the ball through the wickets…another 0 fer… no power to speak of……and his lowest batting average since opening day……Keep this up and we will be in the market for a 3rd baseman, and all those Panda Hats for sale will end up in the Rubber Chicken warehouse collecting dust……

SMACK OF THE STICK :
AFFELDT
Got Dunn to reach for one, but went all Xavi on the ball for a run scoring single and bring the tying run to the plate

RAY
Not untouchable……I say we file a complaint about the trade to the commish office

NATE
With Ishi hitting and Huff in left, you got to stay ahead of Burrell for at bats……and sure the D is superior, but you gotta hit sometime, or we are looking at a lot of Huff in right……and nobody wants to see that, especially at home….

BURRELL
Man, you've been sitting for awhile…..guess when Posey is on fire, we can afford a defensive piece out there in the outfield…but don't get too comfortable, have the feeling some playing time is comin your way soon

JSANCHEZ
Who's my #5,…..yes, you are…….with the emergence of Bumgarner, ….a solid Tim and Matt…..and a less than sucky Zito……well, you my friend are the last man on the totem pole ……sorry Jon, keep those bags packed…….

PS Bumgarner as a Control Strikeout Groundball Pitcher? That’s more rare than Pablo eating Salad

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(The fine print: There will be cussing and bad taste. This is written with the heat of the moment feel you may have during the game, with rational thought sprinkled in now and then. This is entertainment folks, sure there is a lot of truth and I am a genius, but this is all about having a laugh and enjoying the ride…….now lets go heckle Jeff Kent in when he gets inducted to Cooperstown..)

by merkin

GAMEBALL and JOKER ==> GIANTS at NATIONALS 07/10

2010-07-11T00:04:00.001-07:00

GAMEBALL and JOKER ==> GIANTS at NATIONALS 07/10

GAMEBALL

BUSTER

Well I guess it wasn't just Wisconsin….Buster is smoking hot right now, and man you gotta love the way the kid stings to ball to all fields……4 more hits including a single to get the rally started in the 2nd down by 2, a ringing double to set the table in the 6th down by 2, and a 2 run shot to put the game away in the 9th….but lets go back to the sequence that flipped the game for the Giants…..Bottom of 6th, with the Giants down by a run, Buster made the aggressive play on the bunt with no one out and gunned down the runner at 3rd…..and then after Desmond stole second, he gunned Desmond at third to rack up his second assist of the inning and change the momentum of the game……move to the Top of the 7th with Posey in his biggest At Bat of the game hit a hot shot two hopper through the right side in the 6th to plate the go ahead run after fighting off 2 straight 3-2 pitches…add to that…man, in just his first few months of the majors Buster has already become a fan favorite, a the new savior of this team……and with his youth, and talent its hard not to go overboard with enthusiasm…..and looks like the Giants Org have also fallen victim to Busteritis…….here is a shot of the newly erected statue across the water from ATT Park…..

TIP OF THE CAP :
URIBE
After a 1 pitch DP in the 2nd, I admit I was cursing Uribe…..but he turned that on its head quick…..converted the runner at 3rd with a sac fly in the 6th…..and then in the 7th, after Clippard was knocked from the game, on the first pitch from Slaten…Uribe split the gap in right to plate 2 more runs to give the Giants some breathing room

ROWAND
Plays well off the bench??? Hey a leadoff single to start the game, and then yanked a 3-2 fastball out of the park to tie the game…..not sure which is more surprising…..Rowand came up with a bit hit, or Rowand had a 3-2 count in an at bat

HUFF
Even when he isn't getting the big hit, he is doing damage with 2 walks and single and 3 runs scored…..

NATE
Somewhat lost in the 8 runs, was the quick response to the Nats early 2 spot……Nate doubled home the first run of the game, and set the table for Sanchez's single that tied the game….

BULLPEN
With a few assists here and there…..put up 5 1/3 scoreless…….and special tip to Affeldt, Romo, and Ray…..with Runzler hurt, and Mota Casilla and Bautista struggling with control…..these three are the bridge to Wilson…..they need to come up large for the Giants to compete……and I just scared myself…..

PABLO
Great play in the 6th to nail Bernadina on the errant throw from Posey….and 3 walks….you sure only 1 was intentional??? Was Sanchez Pitching to Pablo too?:

GIANTS FAN IN BLEACHERS
Nice Assist on the homer from Posey….I don't know the ground rules in DC, and.I don't know how soft that wall was, and how much backspin was on that ball….but it is possible that coulda hit the top of the wall and then spin back onto the field….well, when he caught it, the doubt was gone…….

JOKER

JSANCHIE

Well, he sure can hit…..on the 1 year anniversary of Sanchez's coming out party……well……the party looks to be over…..whatever corner he turned last year…..well, he turned back again…..the control isn’t there…..4.6 walks per 9 ain't gonna get it done….and when the opposition is teeing off on anything offspeed you throw up there……well, just get the pen going in the first cause its gonna be a quick night…….lets hope Sanchez gets it figured out soon, cause a few more starts like this and we couldn't get Cory Feldman back in a trade, let only Cory Hart…..

SMACK OF THE STICK :
THAT PANDA LADY
Good God, she's fucking Waldo……She gets more airtime on home games than most of the players….and now she on a road trip to DC too???? Pretty sure that’s a violation of her parole……

RENTERIA
Didn't miss ya…..and I swear Uribe has more range…..hell Rick Reuschel could probably play a better shortstop…..

SABEAN
So hows that whole Super 2 thing working for ya…dumbass…Posey was ready with the bat in spring, and so you sent him to AAA when the Giants coulda sorely used this offense all year…….all for the sake of saving a few bucks in a few years…..well, as it turns out you called him up too early anyway, and who knows what the CBA will be in a few years anyway……and even if you do pay him that Super 2 money….good god is that so bad?....a better use of money than 90% of what you squandered on lousy free agent signings that are still on the fucking roster…….jackass……..

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(The fine print: There will be cussing and bad taste. This is written with the heat of the moment feel you may have during the game, with rational thought sprinkled in now and then. This is entertainment folks, sure there is a lot of truth and I am a genius, but this is all about having a laugh and enjoying the ride…….now lets go heckle Jeff Kent in when he gets inducted to Cooperstown..)

by merkin

GAMEBALL and JOKER ==> GIANTS at NATIONALS 07/09

2010-07-10T00:14:00.001-07:00

GAMEBALL and JOKER ==> GIANTS at NATIONALS 07/09

GAMEBALL

TRAVIS

Travis……this guy is the cockroach of Giants first base prospects……usually they come and go quicker than the Fiddle Faddle and Choco Taco stash in Timmy's locker after a couple bong loads ….but Travis has gone from prospect to suspect to prospect to 4A player to starter to pinch hitter and is still on the roster……and actually flourishing in his role of pinch hitter and spot starter….Travis is looking relaxed at the plate and who knows why……I can't imagine that’s its easier coming off the bench…..and who knows what he does in full time play…..but with 2 hits tonight he is hitting .345 with a 939 OPS….with pretty even splits between starting and subbing……could he do the same playing full time???? well, with Torres and Uribe out and Nate relegated to the nether regions of the 25 man, we may just see a few more starts for Ishi…..

TIP OF THE CAP :
TORRES
All he does is score runs in the first inning ….with 16 of 46 runs scored in the first….…and sometimes he drive in himself

CAVS OWNER
Nice Letter…..Mix in a couple F Bombs, and you can sub for me sometime…..

FRANDSEN
Doing well in a small sample size with the Angels…..and a small dart thrown at the "Vets" in the Giants clubhouse that didn't like him being outspoken,….I like to think he is talking about Rowand……

JOKER

SABEAN

I'm not one that enjoys rehashing the past…..but I do it all the time anyway……so as the Giants get their asses handed to them by Adam Dunn…yes the same Adam Dunn that plays the outfield like a manatee with down syndrome, but he also a force in the middle of the lineup with an OPS of .900+ only every fucking year….and guess what, he played about 40% of the time at 1st in 2009 and in 2010 he's a full time first baseman and loving it……I flash back to the offseason of 2008-2009…..where we had the whole….I talked to him, I never talked to him….he won't play first, never asked about playing first……what the fuck was that all about…..you don't FUCKING ASK him if he is open to it, you MAKE AN OFFER and mention he might play some first….. if he takes the offer or counter offers, then great……if he ignores you then forget it……but just blowing the whole thing off cause you supposedly talked to someone that didn't want to play first……I doubt he talked to anyone, probably had Bobby Evans email the agent and ask if he liked playing first or some shit……so as Dunn blisters Cain to the right center alley, I can only think of how many more games we could have won last year, and which Giants prospects Sabean is considering on trading to get him this year…..fucking jackass…..

SMACK OF THE STICK :
CAIN
Well……got the shit kicked out of him by Dunn as mentioned……but also gave the Nats their first run with that Jamarcus Russell Spiral to Pat Burrell in the 1st….and then with the Mighty Strasburg on the verge of being lifted, he got a big time nibble going in the 6th after a Dunn Rocket…..with back to back walks and a bloop leading to a couple runs……and then of course the hinges came off in the 7th….

BOCHY
You know, did you really need to leave Cain out there to be devoured? That can't be good for the kid…..he got lucky to get out of the 6th on a throw behind the runner at 1st, and then the first 2 runners in the 7th got on base……and then a couple outs later ……BOOOM…….8 runs…..thats always good for the confidence……

TORRES
Torres has had a reputation of getting his wheels banged up……and groin tightness is actually worse than it sounds…..cause this means we get more Rowand……

HINSHAW
Well……6-8 weeks for Runzler?....that sucks……now Affeldt is the lone leftie in the pen, and the door might open for Hinshaw……but lets hope not, cause he is walking like 15 batters an inning in AAA….

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(The fine print: There will be cussing and bad taste. This is written with the heat of the moment feel you may have during the game, with rational thought sprinkled in now and then. This is entertainment folks, sure there is a lot of truth and I am a genius, but this is all about having a laugh and enjoying the ride…….now lets go heckle Jeff Kent in when he gets inducted to Cooperstown..)

by merkin

GAMEBALL and JOKER ==> GIANTS at BREWERS 07/08

2010-07-09T00:13:00.001-07:00

After losing their last 5 series in a row, and coming off a horrible ending to the series in Colorado…the Giants entered Milwaukee for a 4 game set……the scene of two of the most embarrassing losses of the 2009…..you had Wilson getting the shit kicked out of him losing a newly minted 2 run lead on a walk off Fielder double….and then in the last regular season meeting you had the infamous Fielder proclaiming himself a Beautiful Flower Blooming walk off homer celebration…..so who saw this coming???/ A four game sweep in their house???... come on now, this is pretty fucking sweet…..Fuck the Brewers, Fuck Milwaukee and their miserable city, Fuck Miller Genuine Apple Juice, and Fuck Laverne and Shirley……the only thing I can think of that would be better is if we mixed in a Fielder bean ball and Huff ending his home run trot in the 3rd at home plate by pulling down his pants and dropping a steaming deuce on homeplate while pointing at Fielder at first……now THAT woulda been sweet

GAMEBALL and JOKER ==> GIANTS at BREWERS 07/08

GAMEBALL

HUFF

Well, I can forgive him for not dropping a deuce…..pretty sure that would garner a suspension…..but perhaps he could parlay that into a Charmin endorsement …what he did drop was 4 RBI's including the first 3 runs of the game….and man I can't believe this guy……0-2 pitch in on the hands and he short arms it over the fence in right…..man, either the ball is flying or this guy has insane power…..lets hope it’s the later……and ever notice that the cheaper the contract the better the signing……1 Year…$3M……he keeps this up and I would be happy to give him a 3 year……just not a Rowand type contract…..

TIP OF THE CAP :
SANCHEZ
The second half of today's offensive attack….Set the table with a single in front of Huff's two run shot, and then knocked in a couple of his own with a 2 run double in the fourth….and then scored on a Huff Sac Fly……like Huff, better than I expected on both offense and defense……and doing a good job of making the Glass Freddy tag a memory…..

POSEY
He wasn't quite done in Milwaukee……and hit a bomb to Right Center on a 85MPH fastball, that easily cleared the fence…..man, this guy has WAY more power with the wood bat than people gave him credit for……now I just wonder where we are going to put the statue…..

TORRES
Have I mentioned…..I love this guy

RENTERIA
Another multi hit game……maybe Baggs should challenge his manhood more often….

RAY
So far so good, and a big 2 innings today…and the first pitcher of the day to throw strikes consitenly…..

JOKER

ZITO

Zito dropped at least 4 on camera F Bombs in the 5th….which is about 0.0001% of the F Bombs I have dropped watching him pitch the last 3 1/2 years…..The two biggest barometers to watch is fastball velocity, and walk count…..well the velocity has been there all year and was there again tonight……but the control was all over the place walking 6 through 4 2/3rd….this is the 3rd time he has had at least 5 walks in a game this year…..and his walk numbers are high, but not quite as bad as they were a couple years ago……..no, he's not ace we saw in April….and honestly, I am glad he was pissed off coming out of that game……the last thing I wanna see is a player like him brush it off like its no big deal……

SMACK OF THE STICK :
LABRON
Come on seriously??? The biggest waste of airtimes since Al Capone's Vault…so I watched…..and good god, can someone hire him a PR guy…..FANS….remember to mention the FANS…..NOT what YOU DID for them, but what THEY DID for you……repeat that you love FANS over and over and over and over…Miami and Cleveland alike….all fans…..you LOVE FANS….got it?? ok, that'll be $14 million dollars for my services……

RUNZLER
Got out of the pickle in the 5th, only to turn in easily the worst At Bat of the year…..

BRIDE
Few more cocktails? Anyone?

FORD
Dude…..I can spot you a few hundy if you needed it……jeeeezuss……

SABEAN
Don't even TALK to me about Corey Fucking Hart……talk about Buy High Sell Low……..what's the matter…Cory Snyder won't come out of retirement???.......fuck…I Talk a bet right now that Burrell will out OPS Hart the rest of the year…..

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(The fine print: There will be cussing and bad taste. This is written with the heat of the moment feel you may have during the game, with rational thought sprinkled in now and then. This is entertainment folks, sure there is a lot of truth and I am a genius, but this is all about having a laugh and enjoying the ride…….now lets go heckle Jeff Kent in when he gets inducted to Cooperstown..)

by merkin

GAMEBALL and JOKER ==> GIANTS at BREWERS 07/07

2010-07-07T23:42:00.001-07:00

OK, back from a short "vacation" and then a couple days of sickness and ……lets just jump right back in….

GAMEBALL and JOKER ==> GIANTS at BREWERS 07/07

GAMEBALL

POSEY

BUSTER POSEY IS A GOLDEN GOD!!! Well, so much for not hitting for power…..the kid had a BIG day with 2 bombs including his 3rd opposite field shot of his young career…..hey, if a kid this young can go oppo with power this well……well don’t worry about the power…..look like he has righted the ship after scuffling with the bat for a few weeks…..balanced approach and quick bat with plate discipline and now some POP…..this kid is better than I could have even hoped,….sure he will hit a snag here and there, but I will jump to conclusions right now and call this kid a right handed Will Clark….now how about a single up the middle in game 5 of the NLCS to send us to the series?? too much pressure???

TIP OF THE CAP :
TIMMY
Timmy was a little shaky through 3, but really turned it on once he was staked to a double digit lead…..after that, it was lights out only allowing 1 baserunner after the 3rd……

FSANCHEZ
2 hits including a back breaking 3 run triple in the 4th…..

TORRES
Got the whole thing started with a Homer in the 1st, and added a late 2 run double

HUFF
with 1 out in the 1st got the Giants 2nd run with a SHOT to right…..

RENTERIA
Feasted on the battered Brewers staff with 3 hits in a get well game…..

JOKER

BREWERS

First of all, I have to say this is the team outside our division….we hate the Dodgers, because they are the Dodgers….we hate the Padres, because they are pesky little fucks…..but these Brewers….a bunch of over talented cadillacing assholes who play the game the wrong way……slugging for the fences, and that they do well……but while they are admiring there solo shots in garbage time, they should be thinking about fielding and pitching……good god…..I watch A LOT of baseball, and I have watched the Brewers quite a bit….usually scouting pitchers for my deep NL Fantasy team…..and this is one of the worst defensive teams in the National League…I have never seen so many groundballs find holes, and double plays bobbled…...sure you saw it this series, but this is nothing new……Weeks, Fielder, all butchers…..Mcgehee has no range and Escobar has hands of stone…..good god I would hate to be a groundball pitcher on this team….and here is the fangraphs stats to tell the story but honestly, I think they are even worse than that…..add that defense to a pitching staff that is below average, and you got a lot of high scoring games….and with no bullpen to speak of, that’s why this team is so down this year…….so trade a couple bats for some pitching, move Weeks to the Outfield and get a couple glove for the middle and maybe you can compete…..you got more bats in the minors you can call up…..as long as this team stays so unbalanced towards sluggers, they will go nowhere…….

SMACK OF THE STICK :
HOFFMAN
The all times saves leader brought in down by 14 and you give up a single to a pitcher…..well…..I think retirement may be your best option

MOTA
On a night where the Giants had one big party in Milwaukee…..Mota decided he wanted to "impress" the coaches with a 33 pitch inning with a couple back to back walks

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(The fine print: There will be cussing and bad taste. This is written with the heat of the moment feel you may have during the game, with rational thought sprinkled in now and then. This is entertainment folks, sure there is a lot of truth and I am a genius, but this is all about having a laugh and enjoying the ride…….now lets go heckle Jeff Kent in when he gets inducted to Cooperstown..)

by merkin

GAMEBALL and JOKER ==> DODGERS at GIANTS 06-30

2010-07-01T00:28:00.000-07:00

Gotta love Giants fans…. on the day the Giants were shellacked by the hated Doggies for the sweep, sprits are high…..because of the "misfortune" of one of our own….sure I could bag on Bengie…and have bagged on Bengie……but that time has past……now is time to reflect on the good Bengie brought and wish him luck in Texas where he will hopefully "be appreciated" (ok, a little sarcasm, couldn't help it)

GAMEBALL and JOKER ==> DODGERS at GIANTS 06-30

GAMEBALL

BIG MONEY

Back in 2006 Matheny went down, and the Giants were left with Eliezer Alfonzo as the starting catcher…..and when Matheny retired that offseason, the Giants were left with few in house options and the proceeded to scrap the bottom of the free agent barrel……and the bottom of that barrel was Bengie Molina….Now Bengie was fresh off a disappointing free agent experience a year earlier where he was left unwanted until February when he signed a 1 year contract with the Blue Jays….after hitting a career high 19 homers in Toronto, there was little demand for his services…..so here we are……the Giants in need of a catcher and Bengie desperate for work……so in swooped Brian Sabean with a 3 year deal for $16 million….of course Brian made sure this contract market value…..and by market value, I mean what Molina thought he was worth, not what was being offered…….but even though we probably gave him more than was needed……he was still worth the money…..hitting for surprising power and nurturing a young pitching staff…..and these were shitty teams Molina had to play for……losing 90 games two years back to back while crouching for 130+ games ain't no fun and is less fun when you are losing……and with the aging offense crumbling around him…..Bengie became miscast as a center piece of the offense for the first time in his career…..add that new role to his already large pride and the 24/7 media and the age of sabermetric and the internet……well…..as time went on Molina lost favor with the fans …..add the fortuitous opportunity to draft Posey…..well….that took things to a whole new level……after some dumbass comment from Sabean, whiny Bengie was born…..the aging catcher with limited offensive skills and slowing defense had an exaggerated sense of self worth and wore his heart on his sleeve……Hey, he's honest and I can't blame him for that…..but he was his own worst enemy….Its hard for the average fan making less than $50K, and forking out $100 just to go to a game to feel sorry for someone playing a boys game for a living, and with career earnings in excess of $30 million……how the hell can you feel sorry for THAT……in a different day and age, none of this would be an issue......but forget all that bullshit for a minute and remember what he DID do…..he had some big hits……he took the reigns of an offense that had nothing, and did his best…..he trudged through some dark days and helped develop what we have now…..and for that he has been handsomely paid and hopefully well remembered……

TIP OF THE CAP :
CASILLA
For buzzing Padilla

ROWAND
Got 3 hits and a revenge dinger in a lost cause

SABEAN
For getting something of actual value for Molina……so I hear there might be a GM dumber than you……probably just a rumor

JOKER

SANCHEZ

Man, when did our whole starting staff forget how to pitch…..the last turn the best effort came from Zito and Bumgarner…..whereas Cain, Tim, and JSanchez….the 3 most talented guys on the staff…..aren't getting it done……and that’s reason 1 the Giants are riding a 5 game losing streak…..

SMACK OF THE STICK :
CASILLA
For buzzing Padilla and NOT hitting his fucking stupid ass in the fucking noggin

MOLINA
OK, one more thing……my theory……Molina has been sulking and this has poisoned the clubhouse and his performance on the field has been contagious….now that he is gone, the dynamic will change drastically…I really see two things that could change the clubhouse….…1st Pablo gravitated to Molina because of the mutual defensive position and common language….now Pablo will likely look more towards Uribe as a big brother figure,…Uribe is the opposite of Molina…..fun loving and all about team…..this can't be a bad change…..the 2nd change is Molina and Rowand are the resident red ass serious players…..with Molina gone and Rowand mostly out of the lineup, players like Huff, Uribe, and Burrell are going to have more influence on the rest of the team…..this includes players like Posey and Torress and some of the younger pitchers….These guys are looser and more fun loving…..and all about getting a team W……again, I think this is for the best…….so lets hope this is a turning point for a Giants team that hasn't looked good since they swept the A's over 2 weeks ago….plenty of time left to turn it around….but you cant dig that hole too deep……

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(The fine print: There will be cussing and bad taste. This is written with the heat of the moment feel you may have during the game, with rational thought sprinkled in now and then. This is entertainment folks, sure there is a lot of truth and I am a genius, but this is all about having a laugh and enjoying the ride…….now lets go heckle Jeff Kent in when he gets inducted to Cooperstown..)

by merkin

GAMEBALL and JOKER ==> DODGERS at GIANTS 06-29

2010-06-30T00:20:00.001-07:00

OK, this team is playing like shit……I am pissed off, frustrated, and don't even want to watch this crap…..can't hit, and the starters… the supposed strength of the team are just average…….BUT sitting at 40-36 with 23 games left against the Padres and Dodgers is a little early for a Russo Rant……

GAMEBALL and JOKER ==> DODGERS at GIANTS 06-29

GAMEBALL

THE BAT

Well at least someone looks like they want to beat LA…..Pat continues his hot hitting ways in a Giants uni with 2 hits and a walk in 4 Plate Appearances including his 5th HR in 61 AB's….You know I am getting sick of hearing about his defense….its not gold glove for sure, but he does fine out there and if he is hitting I don't really give a fuck….you need to actually SCORE runs to win games, and god forbid you fall behind the opposition……you can have 50 webgems out there and still lose 1-0…….so ride the hot hand and keep running him out there every goddamn day…..and if he cools off…..well let him hit his way out of it…..he has earned at least as much leash as Rowand was given……..

TIP OF THE CAP :
TORRES
All he does is score runs in the first inning…..just wish he could do something in the next 8……

PEN
Great effort for naught again…. 4 innings of shutout ball from Mota, Runzler, Romo, and Affelt…….

JOKER

PANDA

Man, I was one that thought the whole camp Panda thing was a bad idea…you don't make someone's personal shit public……..if you are going to get him to work out to make a media spectacle out of it…….thats why fat chicks invented Curves……so they can be fat and sweaty in private…….now the whole thing looks like it backfired…..I don't klnow if Pablo is really heavier……but I know the worse Pablo hits the fatter he looks……now you got Pablo dropping his nightly Deuces on the bases…this kid better have a thick skin, cause the fans are going razz him…..self doubt is gonna creep in…..and the whole thing could implode…..…I said it yesterday and say it again today…..the Giants don’t go anywhere without Pablo…..and not only has Pablo got a .234/.290/.345 line since May 1st…..but despite that, I do have faith he will turn it around……but who knows when…..maybe not even this season……but if he continues to play like this, you got to consider benching him in favor of other alternatives……at least losing playing time might motivate him to shed some weight and refine his game……you can try to coach and talk all you want, but actions speak louder than words…….

SMACK OF THE STICK :
CAIN
Man, we needed Cainer to nut up and give a performance worthy of an all star berth……but instead on the 5th, he makes a bad location mistake to Loney grooving a belt high fastball to Loney for a 2 run single that changed the game…..good god, why is it every time there is a big moment, Giants pitchers miss location and leave one on a tee for the hitters???

MOLINA
Looking slower and slower every day,….and not on the bases, I mean behind the plate….I swear since the Posey call up, looks like Molina is just going through the motions……time to play Whiteside or Posey behind the dish and let Molina try to get work elsewhere….hey, I hear Just My Sizeis looking for a new spokeswomen for their new line of sports bras…..

RENT
Dropped the ball that woulda nailed Manny in the 1st, and got the GIDP before the Giants could even try to put together a threat in the 7th

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(The fine print: There will be cussing and bad taste. This is written with the heat of the moment feel you may have during the game, with rational thought sprinkled in now and then. This is entertainment folks, sure there is a lot of truth and I am a genius, but this is all about having a laugh and enjoying the ride…….now lets go heckle Jeff Kent in when he gets inducted to Cooperstown..)

by merkin

GAMEBALL and JOKER ==> DODGERS at GIANTS 06-28

2010-06-29T00:28:00.000-07:00

Little shorter than usual…..just cause im pissed

OK, so I am in my car and radio station is still on KNBR… which is one of the only clear real stations I can get out here in the boonies…..well "Mr T" was going over the stats comparing the Padres and the Giants and wondering how the Padres were in first ahead of the Giants…..well, since you know nothing about baseball and obviously aren't paying attention let me break it down for you…..THE GIANTS PLAY LIKE SHIT VERSUS THE PADRES …..yes, you heard it, you seen it, you know it……both teams have their warts, but when you are 1-7 versus the Pads…..well….we know who the first place team is there….……Now in the 4 game we have played against the Dodgers…..well the Giants are 1-3 with 2 heart breaking losses…..2 losses that stick in your craw….2 losses that SHOULD motivate…..Giants still have about 14 games left versus the Dodgers so the head to head series hasn't really even started……but if the Giants don't find a way to beat the Dodgers and continue their losing ways against the Padres….NO WAY they make the playoffs……this isn’t a bad team, but this team isn't strong enough to overcome losing that many division games…..SO BEAT THE FUCKING DODGERS ALREADY

GAMEBALL and JOKER ==> DODGERS at GIANTS 06-28

GAMEBALL

SANCHEZ

2 hits including the tying single in the 6th…..and most impressive….27 pitches in 4 at bats…..on a hacky team, this is a godsend…..

TIP OF THE CAP :
HUFF
2 hits including an RBI Single in the first and a great play in Left giving up the body…..gotta love the Huff

BURRELL
2 hard hit singles and a good chew on Torres after his bonehead in the 3rd…..gotta love this guy, he seems to be all about winning…….

ZITO
Wasn't great, but I am happy with just less suck…..and honestly was even better than that…..

ISHI/ NATE
Both came through with pinch hits…Ishi came around to score his…..Nate gave us hope in the 9th……

JOKER

PANDA

Obvious choice…..man THE bonehead move of the game, the week, the month…..its been hashed and rehashed…..bottom line, he had a brain fart…..hopefully he learned from it……this has been a strange year for Pablo as we are used to him making that heady sometimes amazing plays in the field and on the bases….this year….well, he has been in Full Panic Mode too often…..lost in this gaffe was 2 hard hit balls and a walk looking like the hitter we saw last year……but after the gaffe he had taken from him the only thing he likes more than Lasagna ….At Bats…….probably the first time he has been pinch hit for with the a game on the line in his life…..lets hope that’s a wake up call, cause without Panda, this team is very limited in how far it can go……he is the only hitter on the team with MVP potential….he needs to be the hitter in the middle everyone fears……

SMACK OF THE STICK :
RENT
2 DP…..well 1 GIDP….and 1 failing getting the runner in from 3rd with 0 out……

TORRES
bad angle on Manny's ball in the 3rd lead directly to a run…..2 out there, slim chance to make that catch…..gotta cut that ball off……negates the grind it out run in the 1st……

POSEY
Its kinda rough to drop the kid here, but one thing bothers me on this AB….8 pitches 7 fastballs ….and Kou couldn't get the slider over to save his life…..against this limited arsenal he still chased ball 4 with 1st and 3rd and one out..;…yeah, would love a extra base hit there, but know the situation….a single or a walk gets the tying run into scoring position…..when you get to two strikes shorten up and battle….you don't try to jerk a head high fastball off the plate away over the left field fence….even if you are a golden god……don't be greedy…..

CASILLA
Great stuff……but he pulled a Romo… when you groove a belt high fastball on a 3-2 count with 2 out….well, you just close your eyes and pray……and praying didn't help…..

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(The fine print: There will be cussing and bad taste. This is written with the heat of the moment feel you may have during the game, with rational thought sprinkled in now and then. This is entertainment folks, sure there is a lot of truth and I am a genius, but this is all about having a laugh and enjoying the ride…….now lets go heckle Jeff Kent in when he gets inducted to Cooperstown..)

by merkin

GAMEBALL and JOKER ==> RED SOX at GIANTS 06-27

2010-06-28T00:04:00.001-07:00

OK folks not much time, so here it is quick

GAMEBALL and JOKER ==> RED SOX at GIANTS 06-27

GAMEBALL

PEN

Masterful performance kept the Giants in this game…..Runzler was ridiculous and Affeldt Mota and Bautista all put in solid performances….combining for 5 innings 4 hits 1 walk and 10 K's….only Romo continued his Gopher Ball ways with a first pitch fastball on the inside half…..with the depth of the Giants rotation the bullpen hasn't gotten as much work as the rest of the league….wtih the Giants in 2nd place in innings by Starters, only behind Arizona who are on pace to have the worst bullpen ERA is years…..but the pen is strong and needs work in games to stay sharp….and although the result of the game was not good, the guys in the pen, especially Runzler and Affeldt could use today to build on…..

TIP OF THE CAP :
TORRES
2 steal in 1 inning?? that’s a Giants record right?

RENTERIA?
Since he's come off the DL that’s 10 hits in 20 AB's with 4 walks and 3 doubles???.... that’s a .583 OBP…..and .650 SLG

JOKER

TIM

Giants ace in a Sunday rubber match versus the Red Sox….time for a 1 hitter right????
nope only got 3 innings…. what the fuck???.....And something a bit scarier then wildness happened…..he lost his fastball….

Today

Last Week

Now many it was too many pitches in too short of a time…..maybe it was the heat……but I am thinking something went very very wrong with his mechanics that nipped his fastball in the tail……someone get Chris Lincecum down here NOW…..last thing we want is Timmy to screwup his mechanics even more…

SMACK OF THE STICK :
BATS
Pretty sad performance all the way around…from Posey to Pandy…..from Sanchez to Schierholtz…..Giants got down early and just couldn’t come back…..

V MART
Ouch, bummer about that thumb……and this is a lesson for Posey…..he has a gun, soft hands and isn’t slow……3rd base? 1st Base? Right Field, Left Field…hell even SS…..but if you expect this guy to be one of the big offensive contributors to a team starving for offense,….well…….move his ass off Catcher…..

PS Fuck the Dodgers, Fuck them in their Stupid Asses….

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(The fine print: There will be cussing and bad taste. This is written with the heat of the moment feel you may have during the game, with rational thought sprinkled in now and then. This is entertainment folks, sure there is a lot of truth and I am a genius, but this is all about having a laugh and enjoying the ride…….now lets go heckle Jeff Kent in when he gets inducted to Cooperstown..)

by merkin