Wow what a GREAT all star game…. I was on the edge of my seat……..but then I passed out hit the floor and slammed my head against the coffee table….. when I came back to consciousness, I awoke to this annoying low pitching humming in my head. But then I figured out that if I hit the mute button on the TV I wouldn't hear McCarver and Buck.
On that note, I know you all have been on the edge of your seats waiting to see who would win the illustrious JOKER of the first half. I can only hope that when YOU pass out from reading this boring crap, that you are surrounded by soft and non-lethal furniture……
GAMEBALL and JOKE
2009 First Half
JOKER
LEWIS
Booooo……Booooooo……
You remember when Lewis was a part time rookie, who sparkled in limited time?
You remember when Lewis, not Sandoval, was the first significant position player the Giants had produced since Clayton?
You remember when he took pitches because he was exhibiting patience uncharacteristic of most Giants hitters?
You remember when Bonds and the front office anointed this kid the next middle of the order Giants hammer?
Yeah, right….after a 1st half performance where Lewis exhibited the Batting Eye of Todd Linden, the power of Brian Bocock, the fielding ability of Cody Ransom, all combined with the mental toughness of Brett Tomko…. Fred Lewis has erased all those good feelings.. although getting a bit long in the tooth, Lewis is still immensely talented but out of options ……Fred is a square peg in a round hole……won't pass through waivers, can't trade him for anything of value, and would need to play him with the hopes of regaining value on a team with designs on the post season…..
Coming into this season, despite his unpolished Defensive ability I was a Lewis backer…..I didn't entirely buy the fact he would hit 25+ HR, but I certainly expected he would put up a line like 280/ 350 /500……and really he still could, but all arrows point south and if Lewis gets enough playing time to turn it around, that means the Giants are also headed south……..
SMACK OF THE STICK :
BURRISS
Talk about disappointment…… after jumping from Single A to do a decent job in the majors in 2008, Burriss had a dazzling spring which caused the Giants to make a surprise move and take away the 2nd base job from Frandsen. After getting off to a slow start with the bat, Burriss got hot for a few weeks just as a tease and then didn't just go cold, this kid was liquid nitrogen with the bat……with his glove and prospect status intact, Manny went down to AAA and started hitting again… until a foot injury took him down…..now he has an injury marred 2009, which will stunt his development…..he still may turn into something, but it won't be in 2009 and signs say it probably won't be 2010 either…….
VELEZ
If you have seen this kid in spring training any time over the past couple of years, chances are you fell in love….. when healthy in spring, this kid looked like a world beater… Quick bat, great speed, good base running instincts, and surprising power….but in the desert many things turn out to be a mirage……and Velez turned out to be Alex Sanchez all over again……..
HOWRY
Good god, Howry should have come with a warning label, "Contents Combust Under Pressure"……and Howry saved his worst moments for when the game was on the line……he still throws hard, but he loses control and his slider flattens out when under duress….17 appearances entered with a 0-3 run lead, allowed a run in 6 of 17……..16 other games, either behind or ahead by 4 or more, allowed a run 1 time……1 for 16
repeat
6 for 17 when ahead 0-3 runs
1 for 16 when behind or ahead by 4 or more
What the FUCK!
HINSHAW
Oh yeah, I remember you ……after beating out Taschner for the 2nd leftie spot in the pen, Alex proceeded to melt down….. always a bit wild, he still managed to punch out 47 in 39 2/3rds last year…… but this year it wasn't the same story…..as the Dodgers kicked the shit out of him twice before he was sent down to AAA to walk more people……
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And now for the part of this write up where I will likely win no friends……
HUNG JURY
And please, if you search Google Images for "Hung Jury," please have safe search ON!
ZITO
The target de jour after he got the shit kicked out of him by the Padres….yes…the Padres….in a game that should have completed the dominating sweep of the Pads and evened the season series…….but I spare twitter boy from the Smack and Joker…… sure he is an overpaid under talented self important douche…..but that was a given going into 2009. What was the surprise is that he might actually have some use as a Major League Pitcher……yes, his ERA is 5.01 but he has pitched better than that…well not MUCH better……but he is a passable 4th or 5th starter and I actually believe he will probably improve……seriously, quite giggling, I am trying to make a point ….…… His velocity remains better and his curve remains snappy….. you can see this where his K rates are up, his BB rates are down …Zito's big issue is he has a hard time shaking that big inning….Sure big innings count just as much as little innings…but to me that is an indicator of an immature pitcher (and here you thought he was a vet) letting the past get in his head……….Zito still has the tools to be a decent pitcher, but he has to conquer his mental demons…for an example, just look at his game log for the past 3 starts….
4 1/3rd 5 runs 7 K's…touched up in the 1st and 5th innings, while having stuff nasty enough to punch out 7
8 1/3rd shutout ball……quickly got out of what little trouble he got into……never tested
4 1/3 9 runs…. blasted 3 different innings for 3 runs each time….melting everytime he got runners on…….
And then look at his game score distribution…..
5 games > 60 (very good)
7 games 40-60 (decent)
6 games < 39 (crap)
And even if Zito doesn't improve in the 2nd half, he is still better than I expected……sure that 5.01 is ugly, but just one start ago it was a respectable 4.43… and I am willing to give him the benefit of the doubt……..for now
JOHNSON
Pitching like a bargain basement Zito……much was expected after the offseason signing, but the numbers aren't there…..like Zito.. Johnson has flashed ability…but unlike Zito, Johnson's wild swings have settled into a blah performance after blah performance…… the slider is still nasty and the fire is still there so I will hold out hope for the 2nd half……but I wouldn't be surprised if Johnson is out pitched by Zito in the 2nd half……
WILSON
So I went to the doctor yesterday and was diagnosis with something called Alopecia Douchiata, which genetic condition that causes hair loss and is triggered by having a Douche for a closer….. Brian has a nack for getting the saves, and is the best closer we have had since Worrell put together that amazing 2003 season……but three things drive us all crazy……the walks create opportunities that make our hair fall out……he has a mouth only matched in size by his ego…….and most importantly when he gets hit, he gets hit HARD…….he has crashed and burned in spectacular fashion looking at WPA (Win Probability Added) overall Wilson is a -.062……not a great figure, but not the end of the world…..but to get there, he posted a -6.63 in bad games (2nd worst next to Lidge) and a 5.91 in good games (6th among full time closers)…….
ISHIKAWA
After a scorching spring and a great opening day, fell flat on his face for a month and a half…..then suddenly the power started to come around …..but the contact is still lagging behind……jury is still out on this kid, I think he still has potential and is showing small signs of getting the contact in line……he better get that contact fixed because with a 30% whiff rate, Ishikawa will struggle in the long run to hit .225……and you need to hit A LOT of dongs to make up for that….
RENTERIA
Like Ishikawa, was a disappointment with the bat and glove…..but I hold out hope…..a rash of doubles in late June look like a tease…but there is a possibility he comes around…….but what really made me move him from Smack to Hung Jury was his defense…..do my eyes deceive me, or does it seem that his is moving a little better and is faster on the draw over the past week or so? Does Edgar need the heat of a pennant race for him to try to play defense? I dunno, but I hope whatever I saw was real and not imagined……
WINN
Dragging it from the Right Side……but still defending well and hitting from the left…….We expect more from Winn….and anything short of .300/ 350/ 430 is not acceptable……
MOLINA
Despite his hot start, it doesn't look good for Molina…..a ridiculous career low with walks… he never was one to take a walk, but he still could put up good numbers for a catcher……but this year any value derived from his power is counteracted by his low BA, even lower Walk Rate, and the worst set of Wheels this side of a side of a Yugo…..
A QUICK ASIDE
Man did anyone see Pujols v Costas today? I really hope Pujols is clean, he was invoking the God thing, and says he doesn't want to go to hell for using steroids…..MAN…..do you think GOD would really send you to hell???
And Costas….what a self important ass…..Pujols mentions that many records will be broken before the Single Season HR Record….where Costas slips in a "That 511 Wins by Cy Young is tough one too" and then smiles like he just dropped the most clever nugget of information ever…..and you can see Pujols looking like, "yeah duh…Bob"…while trying to be polite….Classic….Pujols comes out looking pretty good, and Costas…well, a jackass……..and I hope Pedro Gomez was watching…..Pujols just offered free room and board for anyone willing to follow him for 3 months……be careful what you wish for Albert……
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